Top Shelf - Gator Days

Utterly unbothered by the mess on his vest, she simply nudges a bottle towards him after pouring her own glass. "Alright?" Simple question and nothing to deep. He ain't gonna fall over is he? Because that would be an inconvenience.

Her fangs grinding slightly with irritation she eventually sighed. "A family thing? Fine then a parting word of advice your majesty before I go find several things to stab repeatedly. Do not trade a curiosity for what you already have. Just because some one is deemed strong in one way does not

Pinching the bridge of her nose she shook her head. "everyone thinks they're God until they get something ripped off...or stabbed in the back.. or beheaded." A deep inhale she clasped her two hands together, her pointer fingers of each hand touching length wise. "Satan has a temper problem.

"And you can not fathom that as a problem? Here. In the land of bad choices, regret, jealousy and envy..to name a few. How big of a target would you like on this poor sods back? I'm asking for the betting pool."

Don't worry about it? At least you didn't add your pretty little head in there. Question can he come and go or is he just here like the rest of us?"

"Care to elaborate or shall we jump right into 20 questions mime edition? Because as it stands a mortal being in hell is rather...shit.. for everyone involved."

"May I inquire as to why he is on your mind so much?"

"I know that. I'm being a smart arse. Satans adoptive son or something yeah?"

'...Gesundheit...'

Small look of surprise at seeing his actual face she did realize he probably couldn't eat through the mask on after thought. "It's always odd to see someone else with a more human face besides myself." Taking a sip of her tea only she shook her head softly "Consider it apology donuts for the

"So you have tried it"

Leaning against the counter she looked at the sinner running it and simply asked. "Local or imported" Answered with local she shook her head and grabbed their donuts and two tea's. Moving past him she motioned for him to follow to a little table by a window. City to be looked at while they could eat

"Have you considered putting up like a giant bug zapper to keep them out? Because we've tried nothing and we're all out of ideas"

"well now that's just false advertising... Is it the Christians? They do seem to have a raging hard on for blaming you for everything."

"You would be surprised considering the majority here were humans. We have this odd and rather bad habit of avoiding change. Now if you wanted something topped with flesh you would need cannibal alley" The donut shop was fairly clean even for hell standards, the glass cases filled with large

".......THE KING HAS DECLARED RENT IS FREE IN HELL"

She has no self preservation what can she say. A scoff given she rolled her eyes. "I don't do cowardly killing. If Im going to off you I'll make sure you feel and see every second of it. So no. I won't poison you and this place is actually good. If you can hold your tongue

A brow raise she took a step closer with a bright smile "You're too soft for Hell if mere words get you this riled up and no that wasn't a fat joke. As for your God may he infinitely go fuck himself. The day he looks my way is the day I throw myself in the lake of fire. +

"That would probably involve running at the minimum..well for you, for me it would be skipping at most. Sure you're up for that? I mean I can skip in the direction of the donut shop if you would like."

Hot stuff? "I ask because this is Hell and we don't do miracles here. Seems rather pointless."

"Now why would they do that?"

Lifting her sunglasses from her eyes she squinted up at the sun before lowering them back down as she turned her gaze towards him. ".....No habla Ingles....." Siiiiiiiiip sip sip from the Hellbucks in her hand.

Whatever is in that bag is a color beyond black, sludge consistency, swirling and possibly sentient.... And straight into the arm it goes! : D Full body shudder followed by the flames flicking at the corner of her eyes, she's awake now and that's everybodys problem "Now what were you saying?"

"Shhhh. Daddy hasn't had her coffee yet" She's just prepping an IV line

Blinking at him she eventually let out a laugh, covering her face in her hands, her shoulders shaking from it all. Her right one coming out she took one of her own knives that glowed with the same angelic material and looking him in the eye sliced off her left at the wrist.

"Oh I'm sure he would. For a price. And frankly it's not one I'm willing to pay but I can't hold that value judgement for others." A small shrug given she glanced up at him "If but I could make it easier for you I would but the best I can offer you is a promise that I have nor will ever

"In Hell?...Yes. It's why you don't ask for it. You take it." A small hand wave to the area around them "They don't care about your happiness, they only care about their misery. You don't come here by being the best version

And opened bottle goes into pie hole. "Hold it yerself. I can't drink my own otherwise." She prefers simple things although she wasn't sure petting and getting an imp possibly drunk was on her list for the day.

A shrug given she slipped the blade away muttering about maybe salvaging it into arrow heads. "It's Hell. I blame religion and lazy is being generous. If this is what they're using no wonder that chode uses that piece of junk tin toy"

"I mean it will. The day arse's learn accountability....so..when this place freezes over?"

'...What? No. Not Hell. This blade. Its pure garbage. The edge it too thin, the handle is crap, what the hell is up with shape? And look at this shite balance!" Laying it flat on its side on her finger she watched it tilt back and forth. Peering at him for a second she raised a brow

"All right then. You've never given me a reason to want to kill you, keep doing whatever that is and I can't see it being a problem. Still getting shit for the first sinner thing?"

"So? My mother would scream that she was also the King of Hell on the daily" Looking down at the blade she turned it over in her hand examining it. "Make it into a less shitty one for starters. The quality of this is abysmal"

"What are you, the cops? My lawyer? Did Steve quit?? That asshole is always tapping out."

Looks at the angelic knife in her hand, looks at him, back to knife, back to him. "..........Maybe. Who wants to know..."

"And what have I exactly done to you?"

The hiss didn't phase her really. Leaning back she pulled a few beer bottles from a portal, flicking the top off with her thumb. A very long pull of the amber liquid, she continued to scratch the imps head as she sipped. "Want one?"

"... siiigggh. Come here." And que gentle behind the horn claw scratches

Just looking at the imp tiredly. "........If Timmy fell down the bleedin well again he can stay there..."

"Honestly didn't know anything about it but if he had amnesia sounds like he would have made good use with some water wings..."

"Rip Mr. Quakers. The duck who didn't know how to duck...Why in the here didn't he know how to swim? Isn't it like basic instincts?"

Thinking about it a moment she squinted. "No. If you go southeast you have to cut through my section of woods in the forest of woe but it keeps you from going into the city proper. There should be a path that runs through it up to the barrier. If you meet a ....well...

Blink. Ok it wasn't the age that was the problem just...where has he been living ...walking around? "..........You know those taller buildings that have all the windows dotted around town? Those. It's a building that houses many sinners and hellborns. Think a very big house but every has their own

"It's a duck..that went into water. Are you telling me Mr. Quakers couldn't swim?"

A card coming into view she handed it to him. "Honestly you would be moronic to not be cautious. Not too far. It's still in Pride just past the south side of the city proper right past the city line, think of it like the suburbs of Hell. Modest apartment complex. If you go the front or back door

Smile on her black and pink lips she leaned forward to peer into his eyes. "Only the most fantastic of deals~ Ready?~ You supply an address with decent produce from your orchard and in return I give you ...money~" Blink blink. Smart ass. Leaning back against the tree trunk she grinned at him

🩸 Ima go to bed, but yall do this for me, and I'll see in the morning!

"because you never know what's being grown in Hell." Simple enough answer given she used a leaf to mark her page as she closed her book. Her ankles crossed one over the other as she sat with her back against the trunk of the tree and stretched out over the branch she looked at him +