What an unfortunate time to only have Heineken 0.0’s in the fridge

Anyone know if the Real Housewives are back for the Thermal race this year?

My favorite part of NASCAR coming to Phoenix in March is everyone getting confused by the very typical rain for this time of year

I sure would like to know who has been buying the dips right before Trump announces he has changed his mind and reverses a tariff. Seems like valuable information in the markets to know when he announces a tariff and when he’s going to rescind it.

I’m not sure threatening to detonate the entire charter system if NASCAR doesn’t get their way and then counterclaiming “I know you are but what am I?” are the best arguments they could make here

I bet people who don’t realize Ron Swanson was satire are having the time of their lives right now

Has anyone told the stock market Lent doesn’t start until tomorrow???

I’m hearing that DOGE has fired The Men Who Stare at Goats

Wait, I was told explicitly other countries paid those????

Okay I’ll bite, what is a tariff

It’s an incredibly frustrating time to have even just a rudimentary understanding of audits

Elon must have rolled out FSD to TSLA, cause it keeps crashing

You can watch the market reaction live in the ticker, and yet they’ll blame it on “Biden’s economy” and the base will believe it

Blaney looking in the rear view on this restart

Denny collecting on old debts, love the commitment to sponsor activation tbh

Mentally preparing for the Blaney stays out for stage points ending in calamity later in the race

Can I offer you a Zilisch passing Ty Gibbs in these trying times?

Someone should straight line T6 and see what happens

NASCAR going for an unprecedented 36/36 having rules confusion during/after the race

So are we just not enforcing track limits today? Aside from the one for Bubba?

Stop trying to sell splitting the stage caution as interesting strategy I beg

Only took one corner to get real fucking dumb

Can’t wait for Hendrick to not get called for track limits today

If I were running the broadcast, I would simply not air the Hate Activist’s invocation live on my sports broadcast

Hey at least that bullshit wasn’t followed up by a questionable anthem and Chris Myers talking to producers on a hot mic

Incredibly refreshing to see a race with multiple strategies play out naturally and not have back markers wrecking sending it 4-wide after the first two weeks of NASCAR

I see why Chip bailed on NASCAR. It’s nice watching a series that understands the sport of racing includes the strategy elements and not just “how many times can we have a four-wide restart within this tv window?”

IndyCar remains unmatched

NASCAR races are official at the earlier of the end of stage 2, 50% distance, or the third PD commercial

Elon could have just kept his mouth shut and made the $25k Tesla. Instead, he gave us the Cybertruck, oligarchy, and Ebola.

A little timeline cleanse, doing our relaxation exercises.

I was hoping to ask my republican congressman about a few things, but I’m sad to report he postponed tonight’s tele-town hall.

As it turns out, the savings were the friends we made along the way

You know you’ve messed up when Ross Chastain is giving you a talking to

Greatest driver in the world* *with walls at his disposal

More Hocevar terrorism

Hope they didn’t have a title loan on Gragson’s car

I completely forgot Custer was in this race

Hocevar is the king of putting drivers in terrible spots in order to gain absolutely nothing

A plague upon the Liberty University car

Return of the Penske train

Clint Bowyer jump scare on Blaney’s scanner

With his background in stealing from poor people Brett Favre would be a fitting guest of Titlemax or one of the other loan shark sponsors

I bet Pete Hegseth thinks 300 is historically accurate

Don’t mind me, just getting my political shitposting done before the NASCAR race later

“We trust Elon to self report any conflicts of interest”

“I don’t know what that teacher lady is worried about, we’re only doing exactly what she’s warning you about”

Looking forward to the Trump Justice Department explaining how birth right citizenship is unconstitutional but a South Africa born oligarch has the legal authority to fire every single federal employee by tweet.

Another potato win. Sad.