Honestly one of the most irresponsible and damaging things Michigan lawmakers have ever done. Short and long term consequences for the residents of our state.

Miss Piggy is going to get imprisoned for karate chopping Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman and Kermit will have his hands cut off for planning a wacky caper to break her out.

I’m convinced that if the fart noise app from the original iPhone launched in today’s technology market, it would receive a $10B valuation.

Since we can’t pinch the butts of women in the workplace anymore we must resort to total fascism.

Considering becoming a kept man and becoming very good at making espresso drinks for my hard working wife.

We did it, y’all. We shut down the government with our woke powers.

Buddy the government has been shut down for 8+ months…

The military will happily murder American citizens. We keep discounting just how nihilistic and isolationist young men with guns are. In uniform or not.

Someday we’ll see Kolo Muani play football for Tottenham Hotspur. #COYS

I could listen to approximately 85 episodes of @pablo.show’s investigation into Steve Ballmer and the Clippers (alleged) circumvention of the NBA salary cap.

We have created a false narrative around tech = intelligence. A plumber is just as smart as a programmer.

Not by asking nice.

Listen man… for the good of humanity… we cannot let this continue.

And stand tall on ‘em.

Don’t let me into my zone. My zone: bidding on auction items at Planned Parenthood events.

ABC Always Be Campaigning

Okay maybe not today. But someday.

Ray Allen for 3! BANG!

Rich people do not know how to have money.

Antisocial creeps like Thiel cannot understand that regulation is not a tool to stifle innovation - but rather a protective measure for the people who inhabit this planet. Anti-regulation is antisocial. It is directly opposed to the greater good.

I have a laundry list of problems with this guy but I need more democrats to start saying this because it’s true. Pretending we’re just gonna retake the house and nothing is gonna happen from the insurrection party is dumb beyond comprehension.

Might sound odd, but I think tonight’s cup tie is actually a big test for Frank. Can he get this squad to not play down to their opponents? It’s been an annoying feature of Spurs for the last few years. #COYS

Hot take: the battle for the internet, at least in the US, is lost. It’s been overrun with content slop, biased algorithms, and the worst people on earth are either the loudest or have outright purchased the flow of information.

This is EXACTLY how the intro to September makes me feel.

Well I didn’t get raptured - which makes sense because I don’t think browns are invited? But I’ll be honest… I was hoping some people would finally “ascend”

Sometimes I think I don’t know what I’m doing and then I see things like this.

Yo people are getting raptured tomorrow? Sweet. Now we can finally make progress as a society.

One of my favorite footballers to watch. On his day… unreal. 🎶we’ve got Alli, Dele Alli I just don’t think you understand 🎶 #COYS always

This right here. I don’t need any more observations on the wild and open crime. When I’m currently getting stabbed, I don’t need a bunch of bystanders telling me how stabbing is illegal. That’s where we are.

Arsenal, scary to say, are so much better than City. It’s been a solid game plan by Pep, but I don’t see how City can let Arsenal have 70% possession and take 3 points in this fixture.

Can these dorks at least make sick looking spaceships? Rockets look dumb.

Matty Cash is the horrific shithousing love child of Diego Costa and John Terry.

Nations Demons Call For Civility Submitted for your consideration @bencollins.bsky.social

The world was a better place when the most popular website was icanhascheezburger

I'm not sure about this branding but I'm not the billionaire business genius

Thank you Richy! #COYS

Would like a Richarlison goal for my birthday please. #COYS

Read this like:

How to Lose a Vote in 10 Days

Everything going on right now is totally insane, but don’t forget that a lot of your tax dollars went to figuring out if baseball players were cheating in 2005. Even as a man in my 20s I thought that was an incredible waste of resources.

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL

Sorry everyone. If I am getting fired, I’m taking you all down with me.

People who bought refrigerators that require software updates deserve this.

As Bodhi in Point Break said: “If you want the ultimate, you've got to be willing to pay the ultimate price"

Eggs cost more

This should be involuntary. Your top 5 podcasts are pulled from your listening history and displayed. You cannot create an account on a dating app without giving this consent.

Gotta win the ugly ones. #COYS

The thing about launching an app is that it becomes real and you get five minutes of satisfaction before everyone lets you know how much that hate everything.

The worst people in the world have realized that Americans are all talk. The slightest hint of confrontation, intimidation, or even inconvenience has crumpled our society.