@infobooth.bsky.social
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📥 38
📝 261
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I use air quotes several times a day now. It annoys other people, but it counts towards my daily exercise goal.
#humour
#humor
#joke
#comedy
#funny
#haha
11 months ago
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Michael Myers would never find me like he did Laurie Strode because I’m never going back into the closet.
#halloween
#gay
#joke
#humour
#humor
#funny
#comedy
1 day ago
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If god is real he can text me, but I’ll probably just holy ghost him.
#funny
#joke
#humour
#humor
#comedy
#dadjoke
#religion
1 day ago
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It’s Julie Andrews’ 90th birthday! Time for my annual attempt to get Burkina Faso to change its name to Burkina FaSoLaTiDo.
#birthday
#humour
#humor
#funny
#joke
#comedy
#julieandrews
#burkinafaso
6 days ago
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I’m big in Japan. At least an XL.
#joke
#japan
#humour
#humor
#dadjoke
#funny
8 days ago
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No one wants the Rapture to happen more than atheists.
#rapture
#atheist
#religion
#christian
#humour
#humor
#funny
#joke
#comedy
13 days ago
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I guess McNeil Consumer Healthcare will be making a $10MM contribution to the White House ballroom project tomorrow.
#tylenol
#autism
#trump
#humour
#humor
#satire
#rfkjr
14 days ago
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I could start my own yard & lawn maintenance company, but I’m more of a lard & yawn kinda guy.
#dadjoke
#joke
#funny
#pun
#punny
#humour
#humor
#lazy
#comedy
18 days ago
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When I see the word “coworkers”, am I the only person who wants to pronounce it as “cow orkers”?
#language
#funny
#humour
#humor
#joke
#coworkers
#comedy
#english
#cows
about 1 month ago
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As a non-drinker, I’m less prosecco and more antisecco.
#alcohol
#pun
#dadjoke
#badjoke
#joke
#funny
#humour
#humor
#comedy
about 1 month ago
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0
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If animals need to add a layer of fat before hibernation, why don’t they just go on a cruise?
#cruise
#hibernate
#funny
#joke
#humour
#humor
#comedy
#animals
about 1 month ago
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0
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Now that Burning Man is over, next up is the Burning While Peeing Festival.
#burningman
#festivals
#funny
#joke
#humour
#humor
#comedy
#burning
about 1 month ago
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Breaking: Ivanka has rushed to her father’s bedside so that he can grope her one last time.
#ishedeadyet
#donald
#trump
#ivanka
#funny
#joke
#humour
#humor
#comedy
#satire
about 1 month ago
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I don’t care about the Little Engine That Could. I’m more interested in the Little Bloodclot That Could.
#ishedeadyet
#trump
#funny
#humour
#humor
#joke
#comedy
#health
#medicine
about 1 month ago
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2
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Sure, the Ming Dynasty might be more famous, but the Alexis Carrington Dynasty had all the drama.
#humour
#humor
#funny
#joke
#comedy
#theeighties
#eighties
#dynasty
#mingdynasty
about 1 month ago
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They really go out of their way to make you feel welcome on cruise ships.
#joke
#funny
#humour
#humor
#comedy
#cruise
#vacation
about 1 month ago
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I’ve decided to stop dusting and just let achaeologists discover my apartment and clean it for me.
#funny
#cleaningtips
#joke
#comedy
#humour
#humor
#archaeology
about 1 month ago
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I love air travel but the lift can be such a drag.
#airtravel
#airplanes
#dadjoke
#badjoke
#joke
#funny
#humour
#humor
#comedy
#travel
about 1 month ago
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0
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The best part of being away on vacation is not having to squeegee the shower door after you use it. 😉
#vacation
#humour
#funny
#comedy
#joke
about 1 month ago
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It’s a good thing salmon is salmon coloured. Otherwise it could be quite confusing.
#joke
#humor
#humour
#funny
#food
#salmon
#comedy
about 2 months ago
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Me pointing to a woman's t-shirt and saying "I've been there!" and then worrying that her boyfriend thinks I mean her breasts instead of the city on her shirt.
#humour
#joke
#funny
#comedy
#humor
#haha
#malllife
about 2 months ago
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0
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The windmills of my mind generate enough power to run the cockles of my heart.
#funny
#joke
#humour
#humor
#comedy
#windmills
#health
#healthtips
about 2 months ago
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0
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If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around, does a beaver take credit? 🦫 🌲
#beaver
#canada
#joke
#funny
#humour
#humor
#forest
#comedy
#canadian
about 2 months ago
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I wasn’t sure if my hair was supposed to turn gray or grey, so I just went bald instead.
#gray
#grey
#spelling
#humour
#humor
#grayarea
#greyarea
#joke
#funny
#comedy
#aging
#genx
#hair
#hairstyle
#bald
about 2 months ago
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reposted by
Good luck finding Jenny at 867-5309 without an area code now.
#theeighties
#eightiesmusic
#80s
#the80s
#funny
#humour
#humor
#joke
#comedy
2 months ago
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reposted by
I remembered 2 people’s names today. I am on FIRE.
#funny
#aging
#old
#humor
#humour
#comedy
#memory
#joke
#genx
2 months ago
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reposted by
USA: Can I ask a ques.. Canada: No potatoes for you!
#seinfeld
#soupnazi
#potatotariff
#canada
#tariffs
#potato
#markcarney
#trade
#tradedeals
#funny
#canadian
#humour
#humor
#comedy
#joke
2 months ago
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USA: Can I ask a ques.. Canada: No potatoes for you!
#seinfeld
#soupnazi
#potatotariff
#canada
#tariffs
#potato
#markcarney
#trade
#tradedeals
#funny
#canadian
#humour
#humor
#comedy
#joke
2 months ago
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I remembered 2 people’s names today. I am on FIRE.
#funny
#aging
#old
#humor
#humour
#comedy
#memory
#joke
#genx
2 months ago
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0
2
Good luck finding Jenny at 867-5309 without an area code now.
#theeighties
#eightiesmusic
#80s
#the80s
#funny
#humour
#humor
#joke
#comedy
2 months ago
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1
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I suffer from mail pattern baldness. I only have a postage stamp size of hair left.
#funny
#joke
#pun
#punny
#dadjoke
#comedy
#humour
#humor
#bald
#postoffice
#postage
2 months ago
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reposted by
I think I know why I’m having trouble using my chopsticks. I think they gave me a pair meant for a left-handed person.
#humour
#humor
#funny
#joke
#comedy
#laugh
#hilarious
#japanese
#sushi
#problem
2 months ago
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reposted by
Oprah: “You get a tsunami and you get a tsunami and you get a tsunami!”
#oprah
#tsunamis
#tsunami
#maui
#hawaii
#funny
#capitalism
#roads
#humour
#humor
#satire
#comedy
2 months ago
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Remember, it’s “i” before “e” unless you’re weird.
#spelling
#teaching
#joke
#dadjoke
#funny
#humour
#humor
#comedy
#education
2 months ago
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Oprah: “You get a tsunami and you get a tsunami and you get a tsunami!”
#oprah
#tsunamis
#tsunami
#maui
#hawaii
#funny
#capitalism
#roads
#humour
#humor
#satire
#comedy
2 months ago
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0
1
I think I know why I’m having trouble using my chopsticks. I think they gave me a pair meant for a left-handed person.
#humour
#humor
#funny
#joke
#comedy
#laugh
#hilarious
#japanese
#sushi
#problem
2 months ago
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Unless you want wet hair, you should never lift your glass of milk pasteurize.
#dadjoke
#badjoke
#joke
#funny
#humour
#humor
#comedy
#pun
#punny
3 months ago
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reposted by
Make fun of me all you want for being pedantic, but if it wasn’t for me you’d never know that you were walking on the wrong side of the sidewalk.
#joke
#funny
#comedy
#humour
#humor
#pedantic
#rules
#haha
3 months ago
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Make fun of me all you want for being pedantic, but if it wasn’t for me you’d never know that you were walking on the wrong side of the sidewalk.
#joke
#funny
#comedy
#humour
#humor
#pedantic
#rules
#haha
3 months ago
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@duffyj.bsky.social
Happy Birthday.
3 months ago
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Katy Perry has lost her Bloom…in more ways than one.
#katyperry
#orlandobloom
#humour
#humor
#funny
#comedy
#pun
#celebrities
#gossip
#joke
3 months ago
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If your name isn’t Paige Turner then I have no interest in reading your book.
#pun
#dadjoke
#joke
#funny
#humour
#humor
#comedy
#books
#reading
3 months ago
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2
2
reposted by
This year, July 1st will officially be called “(I’m So Fucking Glad I Live In) Canada Day”.
#canada
#canadian
#canadaday
#lucky
#proud
#july1
#notamerican
4 months ago
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This year, July 1st will officially be called “(I’m So Fucking Glad I Live In) Canada Day”.
#canada
#canadian
#canadaday
#lucky
#proud
#july1
#notamerican
4 months ago
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1
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For those worried that artificial intelligence will bring about the end of mankind, real unintelligence just took the lead.
#trump
#worldwar3
#war
#iran
#israel
#satire
#sadbuttrue
#americans
#AI
#artificialintelligence
#donaldtrump
4 months ago
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reposted by
Green Flag: morning wood. Red Flag: mourning wood.
#joke
#badjoke
#dating
#funny
#humour
#humor
#comedy
#relationshipadvice
#datingadvice
4 months ago
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0
2
reposted by
The movie Jaws was released 50 years ago. Here’s what the shark looks like today:
#funny
#jaws
#humour
#humor
#joke
#creepy
#comedy
#trivago
4 months ago
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1
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reposted by
The people I really feel sorry for in this ever-changing tariff environment are the contestants on the Price is Right.
#funny
#joke
#humour
#humor
#comedy
#tariffs
#trump
#gameshows
#badjoke
4 months ago
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0
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The movie Jaws was released 50 years ago. Here’s what the shark looks like today:
#funny
#jaws
#humour
#humor
#joke
#creepy
#comedy
#trivago
4 months ago
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1
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The people I really feel sorry for in this ever-changing tariff environment are the contestants on the Price is Right.
#funny
#joke
#humour
#humor
#comedy
#tariffs
#trump
#gameshows
#badjoke
4 months ago
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0
2
Green Flag: morning wood. Red Flag: mourning wood.
#joke
#badjoke
#dating
#funny
#humour
#humor
#comedy
#relationshipadvice
#datingadvice
4 months ago
0
0
2
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