Finally, I can have a plastic half-orc tell me the emotions I forced them to have for me, and all it cost was all my privacy, the environment, and Nazis to be in power.

I'm just gonna say it. They probably spent all the SNAP emergency funds on gold-painted knick-knacks from Home Depot and cocaine.

"Agents were quoted as saying 'it burnsss us!' And 'the visions of upset angelic beings telling us to take the fucking hint already' was interfering with their Klan rally Lunch breaks"

Look I know it's cool when Picard is like "computer! get me a flight and buy me a bagel" BUT WE ARE NOT THERE DO NOT PLEASE DO NOT TIE ALL YOUR DATA INTO THE PRIVACY SHREDDING AND DATA STEALING MACHINE WE ARE IN LATE STAGE CAPITALISM

I haven't been in Battletech for a while but someone made a heavy Mech with 21 PPC's and called it the TC-1812 Tchaikovsky, right??

I'll go one step further--the combo of low-paid leadership and ultra-high billionaire moguls all but demands corruption to occur.

*cleaning out spam* "Hey! We need an overnight manager on-site in Santa Clara CA! From 3pm to midnight! GREAT PAY!" *...eyes narrow in The Lost Boys*

Jesus Christ they gonna get sued for a billion dollars AND THEN someone going to jail.

New TV show idea: Christine and Christine: a female Highlander and her evil immortal car find love and beheadings while wandering the American west. Possibly chased by an evil semi driven by this generation's Hasselhoff with a goatee. They keep dying but coming back

The One Thing I always want to do is meet famous superstars and tell them I loved them in that one obscure embarrassing thing at the start of their careers. "George Clooney! Man, I loved your work in 'Return of the Killer Tomatoes'!"

Ttrpgs are a great hobby. They also take up too much time, require too many schedules to mesh, require everyone to borrow/buy rules, and getting new players means getting people to act in a public setting which I remind you people fear that more than death itself. Great hobby though.

New images of New Yorkers attempting to go to a bodega hours after Mamdani elected Mayor. Our photographer was later eaten by dire rats.

HBOMax's description of "The Shining": Jack Nicholson and his family is isolated for the winter in a hotel I mean, technically correct...

An amazing self-inflicted wound by Trump and the GOP.

I mean, it's been a Good Day and a Good Night. So Good Night.

It was nice to get some verification that no, we don't actually want this garbage.

begging with my entire heart for election results across the map which force the Dems to finally begin internalizing the lesson that throwing trans people under the bus is going to fuck them repeatedly

Hmm. Starting to wonder if this "starve and die for your golden god-kings golden toilet" might not be a winning strategy in the midterms.

I got my tags renewed and voted with one guy in front of me in under 5 minutes so yes every GOP comic and talk radio DJ POS I WOULD LOVE if everything ran like my DMV.

I don't know if there's an afterlife. I don't believe in Hell. I'd like to think that at the moment of transition, you get one moment of seeing just how much pain and anguish and joy and love you caused in your life without any deflection. Just Pure. Understanding. For Cheney, that might be Hell.

"Dick Cheney, Powerful Vice President and Washington Insider, Dies at 84 - The New York Times " Don't live your life so The Entire Internet celebrates your passing.

Tried to make German pancakes/Dutch babies tonight. It didn't rise, so I have now invented the Thick Crepe--the Threpe!!

Dear The Louvre, I could improve your security for a simple Million Euro salary. Call me! If you've kept the password the same since 2014, it will be two million.

Transformers, but with just weirdly disturbingly accurate human feet.

Man, Monday after daylight savings should be a national Holiday. If we gotta do this crap give me an extra day to respond.

How do sheets work in Star Trek? Like do they just replicate a new set nightly? I don't think you could beam sheets on everyone's bed. And I like fresh sheets but I don't wanna have to make my bed every day. Did they ever figure out how to make a bottom sheet you can fold up nicely?

I love watching turtles eat because they always look like they're "anime final attack yell"'ing whatever piece of fruit or leaf they're going after. "NOW YOU WILL FACE THE ULTIMATE BACK-SHELL KAMI KAMI MECHAGAZOR 50000!! YI-AAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

Ghosts returning to the Underworld as the veil thickens: man, things are fucked up Up There, aren't they??

BEE-LAY WAS RIGHT. THERE.

I spent 7 bucks on a Deli sammich and you cut it across, not in triangles?? This is why America is failing people.

The only good use of AI would be to figure out how to keep Tom Waits alive, awake, and paid long enough to sing the entire library of human music in his distinct whiskey-soaked bluesy fashion.

8 kids out (planned on 3) 8 kids back. 80% sure they're the same ones, and I found a full sized kit Kat on the way back. It's been a good night. Happy Halloween and Samhain.

This is not a John Fetterman costume, I am just a bald man in a hoodie.

"I assure you, I am asking for women robots due to my severe insecurity about my wife's faithfulness, not because I would like to fuck a cloth robot"

So I took a nap in my dreams last night and woke up, and I don't know what that means. Obviously I'm tired, but I'm asleep already??

The only logical conclusion is that multiple communities and cultures on Earth got sick of their neighbors and went to make their own world with blackjack and "space orgasm fucked my grammy" ghosts. I can easily see a bunch of Scots going "let's find a planet without an England!"

Pumpkin Jack o lanterns can be anything from silly to scary to deep. Every turnip jack o lantern looks like it's not allowed to play with matches or be around pets after "the incident" and WILL fight you for the last Little Debbie. TO THE DEATH.

Getting emergency halloween costume stuff, and saw these little figures that reminded me of my favorite TNG villains, Omnipotent Jerry Seinfeld and Snorkeler Robot Man. (Please ignore my LOOMING BALDNESS)

If you're reading this you already know my opinion on it, but if you need a good spooky movie I recommend "The Ritual" from 2017. One of the better "Not Lovecraft but definitely Lovecraftian" movies and one of the best creepy monster designs I've seen.

Wait. "Nazis are bad, but nazis riding velociraptors would be worse" 99% of the time yes.

Sometimes you get a story that reminds you that horror is just a drama with more blood. Always love a film that makes me go "ew gross!" and "woah!" and "*tears up slightly*".

I don't think it CAUSED this, but I think it didn't help when we started giving companies silly names.

Link's perma ban is wrong and should be reversed.

Well time to turn on the 10,000 Devils machine. No I don't want to either but you gotta think how those 10,000 Devils would feel if we didn't.

Aw what a nice weird rainstorm we're getting... Kid me: when we were young this would be a snow storm. It should snow in October. ...well, still a nice rain storm. Might grab myself a scotch now though.

I put it to you that yes, a headless horseman is scary, but it would be worse if you were chased by a headless horse.

Ok, as we enter into the Spooky halloween week, I'll tell you all the only other good story I had as a telecom engineer, the Intermittent Haunted Routing *thunder crash*

All right I'll say it if Dr Dooms thing is vanity his mask should be a glorious Roman Emperor looking thing not a toaster with eye holes.

Someone said "Paul WS Andersons Event Horizon" and my brain went "Wes Andersons Event Horizon" and those are two very different movies.

Weapons added to Patterson Batman to start my collection of movies where my review is "....huh. hmm. Mm...huh."