Begrudgingly agreeing that there is a masculinity crisis because guys are failing to make it over even the previous incredibly low bars. Guys are not being dudes out here on these streets.

It’s very funny that the three musical tastes of this site are: The revolutionary Girlboss poptimism government in exile Having exactly one beer while listening to the FM soundtrack “How do I get my two year old to stop crying when I play him Godspeed You! Black Emperor?”

Mac Jones, dies on field, is helped off, dry heaving on the sidelines. Mac Jones in the interview: "Yeah I'm good, shout out to the defense."

“I’m not giving gaming anti-cheat ring 0 access because these companies are owned by China and Saudi.” Broke, Conspiratorial, a bit Jingoistic. “I’m not giving gaming anti-cheat ring 0 access because they’ll goof an update so hard I’ll need regedit and two priests to fix my PC” Woke, Factual, Real.

Every ad firm needs a staff nerd to “well actually“ ads before they go live to the public. The Kennedy Space Center currently has an ad counter programming Epic Universe that boldly declares “only one Mario has been to space” With respect to Lieutenant Commander Mario Runco Jr, Pic unrelated:

Unfortunately, my dad’s choice of dad rock was George Thorogood and Steely Dan so I was 40 the day the day I turned 6. “No Static at all…”

You think a studio exec saw the numbers on people reposting the "Democrats are getting dunked on by Air Bud" meme and greenlit another Air Bud movie divorced from context?

The longer that legacy press platforms AI hucksters (as subject matter experts instead of hype men), the less I think they’re being taken advantage of, and the more I see it is a symbiotic partnership. Slop goes in, slop goes out, everybody gets their numbers juiced and calls it a day.

I could have told you (and did) that the cost of 60-70USD games and what was once a 10 USD a month plan never mathed, and that was before MS bought everyone and Activision. Gamepass was a good deal, but from a business perspective it has never been viable, and I question if it ever can be.

You know how we track violent crime with the leaded gas spike? Pretty sure we’re in the middle of one of those with microplastics or something.

MNF: Between the Ram ad, USO ad, and the disaster meal prep ad I'm not enjoying living in a Paul Verhoeven movie guys.

I think if I had to have “consumer” focused nostalgia it would be discounted 20 dollar PC / PS2 games at Target. Maybe with an overly salted popcorn and an icee from the mini food court that eventually became Starbucks. Walmart always sucked. Real nostalgia is for people and experience, not things.

The hard part writing about the current political moment is that you are decades behind the writers who Babe Ruth called the shot in the GWB, Reagan, and Nixon eras. The easy part is that none of them expected the moment to be figureheaded by folks who believe in magical beds that grow back limbs.

[Dracula Flow Voice] WOAH DEXTER

Never liked the term “Science Fantasy.” Ignoring for a moment that a good chunk of sci-fi is downstream from fantasy pulp like Princess of Mars, it feels like proto-nerds over-categorizing. If you don’t tediously explain how your warp drive works it’s not hard Sci-fi, it’s sparkling space magic.

Those lovely days of summer where Lake Michigan is Caribbean blue instead of its usual knife grey.

Readin da news

Broke: Zelda has a timeline Woke: The Zelda Timeline was mostly harmless fan theory till certain folks wrapped themselves around the axel over it. Bespoke: The Zelda timeline was made canon to get you to buy a 40 USD book from Dark Horse.

Think Piece Machine in my brain: “Be Gay, Do Crimes: Exploring FVIIR’s Wall Market through a Queer Lens” Me: I am trying to fall asleep Think Piece Machine “Contrasting the enforced heteronormative and corporatist upper city with the queer free market economy of the slums” Me: please stop

Does Kyle Shannan‘s QB mentoring ability come at the cost of all of his players legs in a dark Faustian bargain? It’s time to have a conversation.

Nintendo fumbled the messaging on the Switch 2 price, and yet the price hikes on PS5 and XBSX make it look more attractive. Also sends ”maybe later” purchasers to buy on the *potential* of S2 price hikes that may or may not happen. Luigi wins the E3 minigame by doing nothing dot gif

Do the return to office advocates know that you can make yourself a little budget charcuterie at home? That you can put some prosciutto and cheese and pickles and crackers on a plate at any time while at home? Do you think they are ready for such information? For such a conversation?

Made it to a point where the kids pitching started throwing so fast I couldn’t track the ball. This was still little league, and that was the end of that, lol.

True crime girlies will describe to you the most horrendous crime in a conversational and even tone, which is, ironically, some serial killer shit.

the @maxkriegervg.bsky.social theory of soft balkanization keeps ringing true

I guess that’s further proof of Story of Seasons winning by default, what is Natsume doing with their farming sim? Why is that dog about to be incinerated by a hover scooter?

Contemplating the stolen valor of owning a piece of the Aggro Crag without winning G.U.T.S.

One reason why I read Defector is that they have the same enemies in the sports world as me (gambling, pickleball, the Savannah Bananas)

This is the second time a team has traded Laremy Tunsil and tried to make it up in the aggregate and it hasn’t worked out.

I was in stand up this morning at work and was asked what happened in the direct Virtual Boy is Back Mario Galaxy Movie Samus Has a motorbike now It sounded like I was making shit up lmao, I had to swear up and down I wasn’t shitposting.

“You’re going to buy Mario Galaxy 1+2 again, Galaxy 1 for the 3rd time” “What the fuck, no I’m not” “We added more storybook pages about your cosmic waifu” “Of Course Miyamoto San, is 80 USD enough?”

Every new iPhone cycle I want *one* of the leading two marketing bullet points to not be better cameras and a better screen. I’m not shooting a 4K commercial. I am not watching cinema on my phone, give me something tangible (lol AI). “Wait till it breaks” upgrade cycle undefeated for another year

The “Nintendo Canon” is less to do with dastardly YouTubers and more to do with fanbase grouping. If you owned an N64 you probably owned a specific overlap of 5-15 games, whereas Tekken, GTA, Gran Turismo and Sly Cooper players have very little overlap, or much in common demographics-wise.

WITNESS BEARS FOOTBALL

This is just me at Costco

Counting stats (good and bad) are always going to be inflated for long term HCs, but also lol and lmao.

the villains of your age are here, and you get the hero's journey you were sold. kick their shit in

Announcing a movie with key art from exclusive DC artists is another certified Gunn pandering to me banger. It’s all one business Promote your comics in comic book movies folks.

Blitz and Braum is a targeted attack on my person to get me to reinstall rito games. If they put Thresh in I am cooked.

UNC Belichick looking like a washed up Unc (zoomers justifiably beat me to death)

Me: trying to quietly live another day My Brain, at full internal volume: TODAYBORDAY IS LABOR DAY

Resident Evil 1 Remake (2029)

“Magneto was Right” - Really depends on the author. He rotates between tragic villain and stock villain. “Cyclops was Right” - Mostly, but it’s also been years since the Inhumans Editorial Mandate. The war is over soldier, you won. “Professor Xavier is a Jerk” - True for the past 40+ years, Kate.

LSU would be like 30x more likable without Cajun Kelly.

Hnnnng, Colonel, I’m trying to sneak past the guards, but my poor quality collector’s edition statue is alerting them to my presence.

Jerry Jones cheffing a master class *Realizes Micah Parsons is going to kill Caleb Williams many times a year* Ah well never the less

Doomed Yuri enjoyers be like “No, this is going too well”

Ready to be hurt again (Discovering there's a new Chance Album)

Fact-Checking Trump On Crime theonion.com/fact-ch...

Phil Spencer delenda est