brain get dumb again imma strangle you thanks

wrote a dude dying to an overdose and another one taking advantage of drunk women,,,,, yall i did this to myself 🫩

why are my intrusive thoughts so bad,,,,, aside from me putting myself into a trauma typhoon that is 🫩

Reminder to all my European fellas to not stop talking about the genocide and stop using Chat GPT XOXO

why did i, someone with extreme paranoia, think watching 2 triggering ass documentaries about serial killers while being sleep deprived was a good idea ???

watching someone write a crossover fic on stream,,,,,,, give i have to hold myself accountable too

“you write in the way that makes me feel pain- the pain the character feels” gotta be the greatest compliment i could ever receive

I do not believe there is a way to be vocally anti AI and still support/play/promote this company’s titles.

maybe im disgusting and they don’t want me there anymore,,,,,, welp life goes

I think i accidentally left a server and i can’t remember the owner’s user to see if i can be added back in

i find it insane that i feel ashamed to even tell people that at one point i was actively dying so i said i found a better job and left

the garbage that i read had proven my point. no substance, bland 2d characters that does nothing for the plot, shit smut all together, confusing morally grey characters with black flag characters, overlooking the fact that these male lead is just a piece of shit because he is pretty

did i just make myself mad by reading shitty books ? i absolutely did. do i hate myself for it ? absolutely. did that boost my ego on being able to write better than what i read ? absolutely

i hate to see a dark romance that tiktok raves about cause its not romance its just glamorized and romanticized abuse i cannot make that shit up

today feels mundane and i dont like that,,,, i slept like half of my day away and im disappointed in myself for doing that

i think my life is like,,,, over dude i need it done because i cant,,,, i cannot truthfully

i forgot that i had this light angst fic in my drafts,,,,, i will be writing it on and off actually hold up skdjskjskd

bro said “judge me by my enemies, even sinnie’s” my ops are in my head and built like supernatural horror movies and nightmares

im twenty five years old and no one was gon tell me that i had pica what the hell-

i just be wanting to chill in some tiktok streams and they be all chill and vibey and then BAM, *religion* and then i feel like i to rip myself apart and put myself back together with anesthesia

definitely keep away from other animals actually,,,,,,,, that or for euthanasia

i pray for the people who likes asra cause that mf is an abuser like a willing abuser no matter how much trauma he has, he willfully kept the cycle going and does it to everyone except children

AHUT UP MY MORNING STREAMER KS HERE

future ios themes in order !!

this was my birthday fit and makeup it’s been rotting in my drafts for a week 😭🫩

it’s asra’s turn

idk why im shocked that my thoughts are disgusting i used to watch hella true crime shows where violence is shown, my favorite animes has cannibalism, some sort of body horror, torture and extreme violence and self harm

i wanna yap like others but i tend to blur the lines of conversation and intrusive thoughts i have accidentally said out loud

i think it’s a crazy concept that im saying that i felt like i looked like i was on drugs and so high out of my mind and rather than a check in i got was “feeling and being are completely different things”

i did no such thing. i actually spiraled cause i thought i was dying and then my body kinda stopped being a body and i thought i died,,,,,, then i regained consciousness 3 hours ago

done i go die now (updating my carrd and doing other shit)

gonna go to the number generator and figure out who exactly is my next victim for my ios theme ggs

giovani's relationship stuff is done for the most part, only wrote for the core characters thats important to me and thats a reflection of myself and thats more intricately made

have been listening to a lot of deftones,,,,,,, ther's possiby a sliver for concern there or something idk,,,, i'll figure it out when i get into the car

i want to go to bed so bad but i would die violently if i do that

and there’s other disorders that does exactly what i was describing like ocd, schizophrenia and shit i have been aggravated for the last 3 hours istg I’d lose my mind if i get another person saying that im autistic

there’s people i know with autism who says im not autistic,,,,, which is great cause IM NOT

im getting tired of getting called autistic and im so deadass

i gotta write his character study soon,,,,,, his is probably going to be hella graphic,,,, mutilation, alcoholism, self harm through withdrawals,,,, could make him go through psychosis and shit idk yet i’ll figure it out when i get in the car

me: *brings back a dead oc* also me: *gives him extreme self destructive tendencies that’s tied with religious psychosis*

it's choked squidward tuesday rt if you're feeling like choked squidward

i will get a job. i will get one i swear i will

wdym you haven’t heard from me in weeks and the first thing you do is tell me that i need to help you with a business thy ain’t got shit to do with me ???

im not dead i finally hooked up my playstation and have been playing wuwa

i need to like,,,,,,, die or something idk yet i’ll decide in the car

share two of your favourite pics of yourself !

the more i remember that i was trying to save up money to go surprise him for his birthday in the middle of my heavy grieving the more mad i get

⋇⋆✦⋆⋇ first ever #promosky ⋇⋆✦⋆⋇ hi i’m nyx! 27, uk, she/they interests: ✦ cozy & life sim games ✦ visual novels ✦ film, tv & anime ✦ video essays ✦ horror & the gothic ✦ cats ✦ trinkets ✦ mental health ✦ leftist politics minors, conservatives, sh/edsky DNI ♡/⟳ appreciated!

i feel so sick i don’t like it the taste of meat is on my tongue my head is throbbing