Lol, both of my friends bailed on my little "celebratory being back for a year" get-together thing I planned. And got excited for. Will not be making that mistake again.

Oh my god, you guys! Look at this new JD Vance costume!

Oh my god, you guys! Look at this new JD Vance costume!

A year ago today, I escaped California Here's a picture from along the 30 hour/3 day journey. It expresses exactly how I feel about it lol.

seeing all my selfies from about a year to a year and a half ago is sending me into a fucking depression. I was so much smaller.

Next week on Thursday will be the one year anniversary of me liberating myself from California and the sink-pisser ex boyfriend. i wanna celebrate but idk what to do.

feed a hot girl today as your good deed. 🖤✨️

feed a hot girl today as your good deed. 🖤✨️

would anybody like to help buy me some food this morning? 🥺 venmo is @ whimsymaxing Paypal is @ alexisbastian

would anybody like to help buy me some food this morning? 🥺 venmo is @ whimsymaxing Paypal is @ alexisbastian

The band inside of my red scrunchie broke, and I'm more upset about it than I thought I would be.

god should've made more hammerhead animals is all

"Gas Station Employee" pen and sharpie.

you ever have it where you start getting mad about how shitty someone was because now, for you, it's actively ruined all the cool shit they actually did. It's like having to mourn things you still like because they're just poison now and thats so annoying to me to be honest.

if its not super apparent I fucking hate my gas station job because people are fucking awful in every way.

"Gas Station Employee" pen and sharpie.

the teeth of the escalator hunger, mr. president

it only took a month of bussing 4 year olds to and from school for me to catch whatever plague they always seem to be passing around and machine gun coughing at each other.

Begging and pleading that today doesn't suck. But they put me on with the only male co worker we have here and he is the definitive "male coworker who doesn't do shit worth a fuck".

carpal tunnel is so ass who invented this shit

somebody turned the volume up on the sounds that my knees make while they exist.

i finally was able to re-dye my roots so now i am back to firey red and the objectively hottest version of myself.

At this time tomorrow, I will be drowning in caffeine and borderlands 4, and I'm READY.

I love going to bed at 9pm. Im totally senior maxing right now.

I love going to bed at 9pm. Im totally senior maxing right now.

Okay driving school bus is actually incredibly enjoyable and these kids are hilarious lmao

🌕✨️

My digital artbook 'POWER' is a folio of paintings from 2009-2019 including your favorites like these here, as well as a never-before-seen short story 'SWIM' that I wrote for a local zine about Taipei party culture. Get it here: ko-fi.com/s/f0c582ca07

Doctor I trust more than RFK Jr

🌕✨️

ngl I really fucking hate my gas station job solely because of people.

Starting to think that the grown ass adults that point to something and say "that one" are actually probably just illiterate.

I got my CDL to drive schoolbus and i'm pretty excited about that tbh.

can you fly, bobby?

the ultimate guy

working on labor day always feels like just an extra laugh track on the joke that is my entire life

working on labor day always feels like just an extra laugh track on the joke that is my entire life

every white trash family has at least 6 cousins who look like this

customer service work is so fucking exhausting and difficult. it's exhausting because you're on your feet eight hours a day on concrete and because people are stupid. And it's difficult because people are fucking stupid, and thats hard because I cant reach over and slap some of these people.

i am often baffled at how people are able to live

being in love with someone who wants you to cum multiple times in a row is fuckin awesome. i am living the dream. also, he cleans all the dishes with leftovers i forget about in the fridge, so.. yeah. I'm absolutely living right now. 😎🥰

So is he still alive or not lol

there's nothing like 10 4 year olds singing wheels on the bus for ten minutes straight while you're on the bus for route orientation, let me tell ya.

everyone who has ever said, "im not even a mean drunk!" I can promise you there's a 90% chance you actually are.

sometimes i open up this app and its people yelling very loudly that someone isn't doing politics exactly the way they want and that they'd rather the earth blow up or something equally as ridiculous.

omg this cat is posing for an 80s Stephen King cover

can you fly, bobby?