How can your body perfectly allocate equal amounts of fat to your butt cheeks but when it comes to boobs they lose all idea of symmetry

Dont lie or else it'll burn your smartie pants

i'm just me 🕊️✨ patreon.com/rometwin

Your favorite character has every mental issue you have, trust me.

Phoenix Wright, Asexual Attorney

"Try to keep your feet warm when resting. Cuz little blood flows around the feet so they get cold easy." -Moon Tzu, The Art of Snore

I haaaaate sunny days uggghhh they're depressing they *hurt* they put me in such a shit mood bring back the rain 😩 I need rain I want dark gloomy days PLEEAASE

More time worldbuilding needs to be spent imagining fantastical disabilities. Ones that aren't curses they can negotiate into a strength, it isn't something they can control that's like a double-edged sword, it's a disability and they need medicine or other accomodations. I want more of this.

I kinda really hate the whole 'your bra strap is showing' thing going around. It's so icky how the whole thing is just sexually harassing a woman and her being receptive to it.

Who knew Toad of all creatures would be the one to achieve nirvana

Pregnant from a strap call that pegnant

Third-wheeling a polycule call that the spare tire

Ever wonder why ancient male wizards are wrinkly with brittle hair but ancient female wizards always look youthful and are titted up to high heavens? Really shows you how much better women's priorities are

Friend was eating candy while in call and I was like " 🥺 Can I have some?" and he said "Should you be eating chocolate?" oiahwoe

I love fat tummies

Glup Shitto is real though. starwars-universe.fandom.com/wiki/Glup_Sh... That's why it's so funny

I'm a woman wowie that's really cool I get to do that every day for the rest of my life 🥰

I think pickles are really cool And tasty !

Just watched iron lung. I have a lot of questions but I think most prominently: The fuck?

Drugs may not make me cool but they definitely make me cute #drugs #puppyweed

Crazy what lack of pussy does to a woman. I started caring about extraction shooters

today is the only marvelous sunday you can repost this

Me: "I consent!" The PVE content: "I consent!" The sweaty 4 stack about to pull out some buttfuck insane tech to insta-kill me across the map: "We dont!" Isn't there someone you forgot to ask if you could have fun?

Literally every time I try a PvPvE game my conclusion is the same: Wow this'd be peak if they simply added a PvE mode

A slutty librarian.

Y'ever see a take so stupid and artless you gain a new appreciation for what they're talking about just to spite them?

For Pride I ask you to look at what I think is one of the most powerful pieces of queer art. Electric Fan (Feel it Motherfuckers) By John Boskovich

I think my ideal job is as a librarian

My gf keeps saying she misses me while she's at work, and I'm worried her aim isn't getting any better. Or maybe it's just too hard for her to shoot at me while I'm at home and she's at work

It's just a living doll until you treat it poorly, then it becomes cursed.

The new Black Mirror episode was pretty weird

I didn't know I was dating an endangered species

Oh you're on some cute shit today huh Some tilting your head like a dog when you say the last word of a question and then keeping it like that until you hear the answer type shit

Happy Pride Month!! #dailyhexmaniac #hexmaniac #pokemon #fanart

Trans is Beautiful #Trans #TransRights

Pride

Wish I had a roomie who lays eggs. I'd save so much money

Ppl are grinding games in death match for the absurd 10 year anniversary challenges and ppl are getting so bored I spent a minute discussing who's better husband material between Hanzo and Cassidy. It's Hanzo, obviously.

Thank you gays, I love you. I will honor you by being a little more obnoxious about how queer I am and how cool I think that is.

🏳️‍⚧️ TRANS RIGHTS 🏳️‍⚧️

Banning porn wont get rid of porn. The more normal porn will go into hiding, and the absurd fetishism that can barely be recognized as porn will be unaffected. We're going to see a LOT of train fuckers.

It's sweet how nice people are to plushies. Everybody loves those little critters.

The weirdest thing about how weird I am is that people aren't weirded out with me more

Digging through settings and getting extensions and learning tricks to get rid of AI feels like if restaurants started putting feces into every order. And when nobody wants shit in their meal all they wonder is "How can we market better to shit eaters? How can we sell it to non-shit eaters?"

I am not built for a strictly slime only diet 💔

Got my wisdom teeth taken out and while recovering from the nap gas I said two (2!) funny things: Asked my mom if she could call me a good dog (she didn't 😔) Said that drinking blood is romantic. When I was told it wouldn't be healthy I said "It's worth it for love"

Got recommended "ASMR brain removal" 💎 ALERT ‼️

There's something fascinating about TF2 players. I never hear from them unless they have a chance to say their competition sucks. But even that's getting more rare. Are they ok? I think valve should give them another 3D model of an animal in a corner of a map.

It feels like I had this highly customized mech perfect for me and it got scrapped and I got a factory new one and I'm like "Fuck I haven't had to worry about how far my chair reclines in YEARS"