not only do i have high cortisol but i’m also prediabetic… and it’s all from prolonged overconsumption of nicotine. my feet hurt bro.. my face is so puffy, my skin is flaky and blotchy, my hair is so brittle and i have a bald patch of grey hair. i’m irritable and i never relax my jaw. this sucks ass

i lack discipline hahahaha

i can still do a somersault!!! if you’re reading this, go try

working at this vape store has taught me so much about nicotine and how horrible and disgusting this drug is. it’s so addictive. it’s so bad for your brain and nervous system. i am in the worst shape i have ever been in from overconsumption. but how can i stop? this helped me stop cigs, but what now

when i think about my bad habits from an outside perspective, it becomes so obvious how to solve all of my problems. so much of what i do stems from my inability to admit my faults and accept my conditions, i never let myself relax even when i’m sitting and doing nothing, i’m never not stimulated

oh man i think i have high cortisol and the internet isn’t good for it! i better uhhhhh find something to do that relaxes me and stop worrying about internet dot com so much

i took a microdose and within 20 minutes i began feeling incredibly light and smooth and like nothing could possibly bother me, and then i dropped my phone hahahaha there’s a bright white and green line cutting my screen in half. it’s mildly annoying but i’m just glad i can still use my keyboard 😌

it’s very funny to me how different everyone is, many things that make logical, ethical sense to me are absolutely abhorrent to so many other people hahaha it’s funny but it also makes me crazy

the psychedelic renaissance is in full swing. people recognize that psilocybin is medicinal, it’s not a boogeyman anymore. it won’t fry your brain, it won’t make you think you can fly. yes there is risk, some people should not take it, but for the majority i believe it is a useful tool for healing

i often wonder if i would have a different perspective if i hadn’t been allowed to be as free as i was growing up. if i weren’t allowed to ask so many questions, would i still be seeking answers? i can’t imagine being oppressed to the point of fearing curiosity itself. i dread that reality

i love pigeons so much!! i love watching the males strut around with their chests out and the females ignore them completely hahahaha

i always regret posting my art, people always tell me to hang my paintings at cafes to sell them. why on earth would i do that? i’d have to charge double for my paintings because of commission, the art cafes here charge 30-50%.. that grosses me out. why don’t these fuckers just BUY MY ART

making the internet safer for children??? hahaha i was a kid with unlimited private access to the internet and i saw some dark shit bro. i satisfied all curiosities early man. i can’t imagine how vulnerable my mind would be if i hadn’t been desensitized by 12, i’m rock solid bro nothing shocks me

teenagers should have their own fucking planet i’m so tired of seeing them

i wish i could tell people to fuck off when they say i should sell my art at the market hahaha like just fuck off

people should be casually tested for more things, like you should have to pass a quiz to be allowed into an event venue or a festival.. there should be tests for everything and those who don’t pass should have to fucking study

I would like a physical copy of my game please.

i don’t use AI for my art, i don’t type prompts into engines and i especially don’t just take credit for the work of others, but there are folks out there shamelessly doing it and getting away with it and making money with it. it’s so… disturbing

i made my first ever phosphorescent painting!!! the skulls are painting with glow in the dark pigment mixed into white paint and i’m so happy with how they turned out!!!

someone told me encino man is brendan fraser’s best role, but i could tell they hadn’t seen bedazzled. he plays like 7 different characters in that one, each feeling authentic while capturing the essence of the original persona the characters are derivatives of, a magnum opus film, a masterpiece!!

i love girls so MUCH

watching call of duty montages with my bf and it’s all dope ass banger songs then suddenly they chose australia by attic abasement and now my mascara is running hahahaha fuck off

spotify keeps playing the songs that helped me break away from the abuser!!! and the songs don’t hurt me anymore!!! i’m actually happy to hear these songs now

being a bisexual girl who never got to be gay with anyone because of my relationship circumstances has been an unsatisfying and disappointing journey to say the least. i wish i came out earlier, i wish i had the opportunity to date more.. i’m full to the brim with regret and very horny about it

so stupid how i only want to get active and better myself when i’m at work hahahaha soon as i get home it’s back to the snacks

i’m on a dark path to becoming seriously unfit if i don’t change something right now, fuck

i can’t even believe that they greenlit the storyboard for pocahontas, maybe in the 30s sure i’d buy it, but in 1995????? how did they think that was an appropriate way to introduce kids to the concept of colonization??? sure, it has its charm as an animated film, but the subject matter is.. uncanny

molly shannon getting her star on the walk of fame is something i didn’t realize would heal me

i made another one !!!

i made a painting y’all !!!

i drew venjent three years ago and he responded to it with love and told me to keep creating, i think i’ll get that drawing tattooed along with that message. i didn’t realize how much it meant to me until recently

gummo is just diet pink flamingos

MY GREATEST FEAT OF ALL TIME IS LEARNING ALL OF THE WORDS TO NO TEARS BY SCARFACE BUT I CAN NEVER RAP IT FOR ANYONE BECAUSE I AM A SMALL WHITE GIRL FROM CANADA

why are so many things named “milk and honey”??? is that appealing to most people, thinking about milk…. and honey?? i just picture someone dripping honey into milk, but the milk is greasy and the honey just clumps up in the bottom of the … milk… idk man. restaurants, cafes, bookstores… milk… honey…

i’ve been working on eliminating suffering in my own life since i was a kid. i remember being 12 and realizing that expectations shape outcomes. i’ll never be disappointed if i never expect anything to happen. as long as something happens, expectations have been exceeded. i need to return to that

i used to work with this old man who is a known asshole, says disgusting things to young girls on the job but never got in trouble because he’s “from a different time”. well, he got punched at the bus stop and now the whole town is defending him. they don’t even know he had it coming, but i know…

fuck i love drum and bass

i’m bi but i fucking hate the bi flag. the rainbow was good enough for all of us i declare

it must be fun to believe in things that can’t be proven but holy fuck i literally can’t. my mind won’t let me. if it cannot be tested or proven, i can’t believe it. it’s incredibly frustrating to see other brains functioning like that, accepting information without challenge… it creeps me out

i’m gonna get a venjent tattoo

so basically always fuck up your plans because you never know when the right choice is actually sitting down at a bar and crying about life and talking about the bad things. she never even considered that she’s a victim, and i helped her realize that. i’m so baffled that i was helpful, i was so high

i can’t believe i thought i ruined saturday night, turns out my bf’s boss actually took in all the advice i gave her about her divorce and she finally fired her abusive spouse who’s worked for her company for their entire marriage, so he could abuse her and control her at work… i’m so proud of her 😭

i’m so sad that i ruined my saturday night by getting too high and literally overdosing in front of my boyfriends boss hahahahaa we couldn’t go to any of the shows we wanted to see because i was too fucked up and now i’m dealing with the guilt of ruining the biggest night of the year

i got absolutely obliterated on mdma last night with my boyfriends boss and our plan was to go to a punk show but we got too high and went to a pub across the street instead. someone got stabbed at that punk show and we got to watch all the cops and ambulances clear it out from the pub window 😟

oliver tree is dead and i cannot even believe it. i don’t want to believe it

cheesy michael been stuck in my head for fucking days. open up the door

people think they can tell an antinatalist not to have kids hahahaha “i hope you don’t have children” me too

encyclopedias were my favourite books as a kid. i never wanted to bother straining my eyes for fiction. now as an adult i’m tired of facts. i want to get lost in a fantasy world

i have an overactive sympathetic nervous system does anyone have any TIPS and TRICKS

it actually infuriates me that people believe nonsense which can’t ever possibly be tested or proven