Setting cars on fire is a fine American tradition around the culmination of a major sports victory (or loss). All the better to happen on Google's tab rather than some rando who parked wrong that night. sfstandard.com/2024/02/10/w...

DO YOU HAVE THE NUMBER FOR THAT KID WHO MOWED THE WHITE HOUSE LAWN I MIGHT NEED TO DO MORE YELLING LATER

"Something is amiss," thought Sherlock Holmes at the Miss Universe pageant. Later, it turned out to be Moriarty indirectly involved in money laundering.

This Valentine's Day, remember that nothing says, "Let's complicate our friendship" like a heart-shaped pizza.

Today I am making a card game. In related news, a lot of dishes getting washed.

Don't worry Nikki, I've been losing to "none of the above" in meaningless contests for years, look how I turned out

Good day for Twitter counterprogramming. Reruns of syndicated sitcoms and unscripted dramas and the like

I swear if one more current event happens I will lose it