the next time i come here emoposting out of nowhere ask me if i’ve stocked up on midol I’m not saying it’s a pattern but it’s weird it happened twice lmao

“do all my friends hate me, or do i just need to go to sleep” yeah

my head is going 90 miles a minute about crafting drag numbers and i am actively fighting back that voice in my head that says no one gives a fuck and it’s uninteresting i’m so glad my self-esteem is such a complicated tangle after being made to feel like i was second rate for years

I’m sipping gin + tonic in the back of a weird bar. I’ve made it.

“I used to pray for days like this,” and it’s just having a warm home where my bills are paid, the candle smells like fall, and my Stardew is modded.

me: I think I’m pretty much an ambivert! I like staying in and going out equally! also me after two days in a row of socializing: hey google how do I become a hermit

did unsettling, sad drag last night that’s the second time I’ve done a number and it feels like I black out and wake up afterward, unaware of what I did on stage but people seemed to enjoy the act, I’m learning to cradle those compliments close

the book nook scent from bath and body works in my room call that wizardcore

"The frontiers demanded a blade. And so I heeded." (Gift art) #wyllbg3 #wyllravengard #bg3

I really wish I could accurately explain how it feels to be inside my head right now Everything is flourishing, my work is paying off, my ass is fat, my rent is paid

WHATS SEXIER THAN WIZARDS NOTHING #baldursgate3 #galedekarios #galeofwaterdeep #bg3 #bg3cosplay #galecosplay

everyone please do the manifesting thing that this work pays off and i’m formally asked to travel to NY for my job aaaaaaah

the energy and vibe of dragoncon is what keeps me going back. you can’t beat making friends in line waiting for a panel, yapping about common interests and being in a community atmosphere like that. (I am severely overstimulated and don’t want to leave my house for the next 5 days tho)

I am so, so so so so so tired of letting this consume me If you haven’t experienced before I know I sound dramatic But imagine you get bit by a fire ant. It hurts, you brush it off but every few months it comes back to bite you again for no reason other than to remind you it exists

I really wish that she could let this go. I want to enjoy myself without the worry that any one person looking my way is there to “report back” to my ex. I am trying to heal and I need her to do so too.

I’ve been trying to be more conscious about food waste as my little ingredient-delivered-by-post-dinners often have an excess of bits. Turned caramelized onions and a garlic chipotle mayo into a southwestern omelette and I am in HEAVEN.

I got THE gideon nav boots and they’re so comfortable and I am so excited to be HOT and STUPID

I know that I’m nesting (not in the omega sense but the period/PMS sense) because I have lit fall candles, I have done the dishes, laundry, changed litter boxes, organized my end tables in the living room ALL BEFORE LUNCH

despite everything, i’m still a hater lol

lmao imagine fumbling me #tlt #thelockedtomb #gideonnav

booted up bg3 and felt /guilt/ out of nowhere I am allowed to rest, dagnabbit

The best part about all the BS surrounding this friend breakup is that she’s the one who went scorched earth and blocked the entire extended friend group in the course of 72 hours so idk what she wanted if not this

nearly posted earlier when I was full of rage and turned that into actually getting work done lol

modernizes ur viktor #arcanecosplay #viktorarcane

recently I wonder how many versions of me exist in other’s heads when I get one word responses now is it because they’ve been told I’m a horrifying gay monster out here breaking the hearts of innocent 37 year olds who’ve never done anything wrong in their life or am I just not worth knowing

small things i’m romanticizing: getting stoned, crawling into bed, eating a lofthouse cookie while watching a man make historic meals on YouTube. bliss.

recently

I completed this yesterday. The dye is splotchy, the stitches stiff. But it is whole and it is mine.

I will not apologize for my crash-outs. But I will make a better effort of recognizing that I am allowed to feel these feelings and move forward. I cannot control what someone thinks of me. I cannot control what someone says about me. All I can control is what I do with my time on this planet.

I have the entirety of next week off and I think I’m going to drive up to the mountains and find cold water and sit

lmao waking up to the knowledge that a girl who’s been on medical leave for the past 4 months got promoted but I didn’t— mmmmmmm I’m not allowed to spiral before noon

I feel like I just need to sob

I feel the need to be funny and loud to overcompensate for the fact that I am tired and on edge And every time I speak I feel myself inwardly cringing if I was too loud, too much But I can’t be vulnerable or show my belly or cry or

job stress people stress climate stress

Dandadan is an allegory for pubescence and growing up and is being told in such a weird way that I fear I have no choice but to stan

I decided to upgrade this piece to celebrate the beginning of pride month { #tlt | #thelockedtomb | #griddlehark }

No cops at Pride includes the cop in your head who tells you to police other queer people. Learn the difference between being uncomfortable and being harmed. Deal with your discomfort on your own time. Pride is for the community, not just you.

I keep having to remind myself that I’m allowed to be mean.

BACK ON MY BULLSHIT

gay mourning period over time to get a new HAIRCUT and feel hot again

one day I’ll feel alright but some days are still just BIG in the shadow of last month and I am going to get better changing my hair so it doesn’t look like yours (after copying mine) focusing on not finding you everywhere, the brick dropping into my stomach at seeing a mention of you

hold on let me train the algorithm some more to show me more Wyll. [clears throat] I LOVE WYLL RAVENGARD OF BALDUR'S GATE 3 FAME AND I SURE WOULD LOVE TO SEE MORE OF HIM. AGAIN THAT'S WYLL RAVENGARD OF—

i am a crab in a non-stick pot how do i crawl out the other side in one piece?

Moon Maiden #bg3 #dameaylin

fantasy!mage viktor based purely off of this walking stick I have but purple hexcore corruption staining fingertips purple, leeching up legs the rune dangling off a chain gilded elements fused into nature, a bog witch out of time

Clair Obscur is waiting for me upstairs and I know it will probably ruin my life

I never believed it was butter

Destroyer of Worlds

I am…stretching from a curling position, warm and cared for Talking about my favorite things comes easier Playing my favorite games come easier I’m not sitting on my couch for hours on end scrolling I want to live .ᐟ