Paused MAD MEN while Ted Chaough’s partner was in the hospital and the HBO Max interstitial ad made it look like his dying wish was for a Whopper.

Extending Baz before he throws a real pitch for the club is certainly a move

Volume PR on the deadlift, matched my best on the bench. This has been your lifting update

the song of the day is Sunny by Bobby Hebb from 1966

What about a giant hole sitting on top of an underground parking garage directly next to a massive capacity central business district subway station at the origin point of a major city's street grid? Asking for a friend

U2's first 3 or 4 albums are really good because they are straightforward post-punk albums and post-punk is an excellent genre of music. Then they put out Joshua Tree and Became U2, Generic Rock Band and got bad. That's my 2 cents

Checo proving a carnage merchant this season

Pro: the Old 97's kicked ass Con: they did not play If My Heart Was A Car

Do any of you have a Henson razor and have you ever been able to get a decent shave on your neck? I feel like I just need to move on to another product

162-0

Does Tyler Wells have a Bob Ross painting tattooed on his forearm

STOP THE COUNT

Melanie Newman hawks the Truist Club by saying that there is dedicated parking and a private entrance so you feel like a real VIP. I hate everything about this entire philosophy toward the use of public space

The Orioles outfield is going to give me a stroke by May I fear

This commercial that refers to Eric Byrnes as a "Pro Baseball Legend" is stretching the English language to the point of absurdity

As a Coby Mayo Slanderer I am in tatters

First Orioles Opening Day in 6 years without Ramon Urias. I might cry

OH MY GOD STOP TRYING TO SAY X IS AN IMPORTANT PLATFORM ITS NOT ITS THE SIZE OF PINTEREST BUT IF I WAS LIKE 'DEMOCRATS GOTTA WIN THE COMMENTS WAR ON PINTEREST' THEYD LOCK ME FUCKING AWAY

Damn having this hairline at 22 is wild

it's incredible that as long as you do the right amount of bigotry you can just rob the country blind and enough people will not care, even though those same people will be filled with incandescent rage if someone uses food stamps to buy a 12 pack of diet coke

The song of Opening Day is Birdland by Weather Report, the opening track to the 1977 album Heavy Weather. Let's go O's

Good morning Baltimore there is Orioles baseball today

Lmao

Every time I watch THE THING (1982) it gets better and it was perfect the first time

the song of the day is Back in the Tall Grass by Future Islands from the 2014 album Singles

Farewell Transmission is one of the most compelling songs ever that only has 3 chords in it

Took 20 seconds off my mile PR and 18 seconds off my km PR today. This has been your running update

The reason that gambling is unlike other vices to me is that gambling is a direct drain on finances unlike other addictions which are indirect drains on finances, and people are very bad with money. You can make your family homeless by drinking or doing coke but usually indirectly by getting fired.

Sorry to everyone who followed me in the winter for my movie and music takes and will now have their feed filled with me posting barely intelligible animal noises and things like "SAMMY BIG BALLS GOES YARD!!" for the next 6 months

I think one of the funniest concepts is "solo dates". This apparently describes people just going and doing things like eating dinner or going to the movies but without anyone else coming along. Also known as "existing in the world"

*inner monologue* if I make it through this week I will have a baseball game to attend on Saturday

The baseball mind

Man I've just been playing Who's Gonna Mow Your Grass? repeatedly since this post reminded me that it exists. I've sung it like 8 times with my guitar today. Such a fun, brisk tune with weird chord changes

Lee was a horrible man and a traitor to the republic. The army he led into an invasion of Pennsylvania with kidnapped free black people and sent them into slavery. Whatever tactical genius he possessed led him in his most famous battle to just march his army straight into the enemy’s front.

New recent life PR on volume for both deadlift and bench today. DL form not great though, reopened a shin scrape. This has been your lifting update

The song of the day is You've Really Got A Hold of Me by The Miracles from 1962

I have now filled two full loyalty cards for @fullstorybaltimore.tours which I think entitles me to the key to the city. Do not fact check

Any time that Kansas loses is good unless it's to Duke

O's win, Walgreens lose. Superior city victorious

What is this sensation? Uncovered calves? Outside?

It is officially Baseball Week

The song of the day is The Village by New Order from the 1983 album Power, Corruption & Lies

Every time I visit CA I can feel the lure of the dark side. What if I lived in a $5 million SFH? What if I drove a Tesla to bag my own groceries in the Erewhon hemp bag? What if I voted for the “Kill All Homeless And Renters, A Kind Of Homeless” ballot initiative? What if I drank 17% ABV cabs?