Jing-a-di-jing Hee haw hee haw He's Dominik Szoboszlai

Curtis Jones is the player Jude Bellingham wishes he was

Stopped watching the reds at 1-0 down cos I had to get my son to bed. Might stay upstairs out of the way. A move of tactical genius.

Broadly how I feel, this

Liverpool here, achieving something Amorim has failed to do by making Man Utd look like a decent team

Somebody needs to take Gary Neville's hip flask off him

Hahaha. Cody hitting the bar like your uncle at your second wedding.

Michael Oliver "doesn't see" an awful lot, for a guy whose job heavily involves seeing things

The rules on what's a foul and what's a foul on Salah are absolutely miles apart aren't they? It's wild how much licence there is to just boot him when he's on the ball

This seems less likely now (but ITV will platform anyone on this show, so never rule it out)

I'm no expert on solving the nuanced complexities of the situation in the Middle East, but the idea that a dickhead like Trump is going to deliver any kind of long-term, sustainable peace in the region beyond these initial developments is absolutely laughable.

Most common lines on #TheTraitors 1. "I am.... a faithful" 2. *peacock noises*

I thought a long time ago that you can't make this many wholesale changes to a squad and expect it to click There are two many variables for there to be good cohesion. Not just new faces in the team, stuff like the commercial pre-season nonsense, different personalities, tactical and system changes

Increasingly convinced that Ruben Amorim is playing a character in a huge scale social experiment. Some sort of mega prank organised by Mr Beast or something.

I'm running a Beatles pun contest, and I'm getting Paul McCartney to heyjudicate.

Leandro Trossard looks like I feel

Just got home and seen the penalty award. The most 'Galatasary away' penalty you could ever concede.

New! Cassetteboy vs Keir Starmer. This took absolutely ages, so if you'd like to buy us a coffee at ko-fi.com/cassetteboy we'd really appreciate it. Thanks!

RAPTCHA

Arteta is fucking mad isn't he? Sees things 'differently' to everyone else. LinkedIn manager. "Do the tenuous bit with the lightbulb again"

Running a 100km ultra marathon tomorrow. Delighted at the forecast for the entire route.

Music FACT: Placebo were originally a Cure tribute band

A government of pathetic, spineless cowards fawning over that fascist orange wanker. Embarrassing.

Em-berr-mo now is it? Not pronounced like the popular Kinder product anymore

Reijnders loves to twat a ball needlessly out of play. Pep playing 4D chess again.

The most nailed on handball ever lads

Was Kerkez's last act before getting the hook to be nutmegged by a backheel? A suitable summary of how it's gone for him today

When you consider their success as a brand, it's mad that they went with the name Sweaty Betty "We're going to use a name like a heavily perspiring gran"

RFK Jr looks and sounds like a guy who has totally disregarded medical science for most of his life tbf

Liverpool's media team should think about changing their formula in new player interviews of getting the player to say the same thing 8 different ways as the player becomes increasingly uncomfortable trying to rephrase the same sentiment 8 different ways.

Bruno Fernandes is an absolute fanny, and it's hilarious that they put so much faith in him despite him clearly being a shit example of a man. Being the best player in a team of shite for a couple of years doesn't make you a great player.

City fans getting off to beat the traffic, hilarious

"Instead, we will work hard to fix the things that we know aren't true, fully we can't because they aren't true, but pretending we can because lies are easy but convincing people they're being lied to is difficult"

Mephisto, by Joaquín Espalter y Rull, 1872, 📸 by Stu Forster

Carragher is fucking tedious isn't he?

Bournemouth manager Andy Burnham delighted with that goal

Milos Berserkez

The most handball so far this season. Madness.

Pacey, tall centre forward White ankle sock / boot combo Blonde bits in the hair That Adidas kit

Pronouncing Gen AI like Forrest Gump says Jenny

2025 reboot of memento but Leonard just has one tattoo that says “check your notes app” and the whole movie is him on his phone

Imagine having to clean up that glitter later. What a fucking nightmare.

"Have Tim Henman killed"

Been watching a load of his goals and this is still true. A thing of beauty.

So sad to hear about Diogo. Absolutely tragic. Devastated for his family.

5 weeks ago he won Premier League 3 weeks ago he won Nations League 2 weeks ago he got married Father of three. 28 years old. Heart is shattered for his family 💔

Sorted

What I like most about Booking dot com is the concrete reassurance you get from the 17 different emails they send you after you book your hotel room.