Until someone builds a smaller Bowser

“The real problem with America is my bitch ex-wife” is perhaps the most MAGA take ever created

Professional wrestling Harlem Globetrotters v the Generals & the good guys winning at the end of a Marvel movie are all more unpredictable than a showdown between the Dems & Repubs. This shit is as rickety & fake as a Wild West stunt show at a third tier amusement park. #DemsCave #CorruptDuopoly

Whoa they invented a word for when you’re a weird loser nobody wants to work with?

The aesthetics of a Scientology building

I bought a month of Fox to watch the World Series and as a nice little bonus I get to watch Fox News lose their goddamn minds about Mamdani

Alan, it’s time

It must have been awkward for Riley to stand so close to someone whose ideology she doesn’t identify with - a winner

He’s still cold in the middle

Every time he posts is an indictment against capitalism. We let someone that dumb have all that

When you’re a Chelsey Lately panelist trying to get to your pre-written joke

If Scott Adams dies I hope someone wears one of those bent-upwards Dilbert ties to the funeral

I’m sorry, Canada, I guess you’ll just have to fall back on having a better country in every way

I hope the teams will remember to get different scores tonight

“It’s… always been 5-5.”

Home run edging

We have to end ghost kitchens

Going forward it would be nice if people remember to not cast this piece of shit. I know it’s difficult — he’s a great actor with incredible credits

Yes. Can the one on the left not breastfeed because his BAC is too high

The Blue Jays logo looks like it has an unread notification and it’s driving me crazy

Yeah so like, that’s why

A funny thing about Misery is, you realize that the way James Caan plays off of Kathy Bates is actually the exact same way he ends up playing off of Will Ferrell in Elf

Do you think I’d explain my masterstroke if there remained the slightest chance of you affecting its outcome? I made the NYPD woke 35 minutes ago.

Someone arrest this dangerous antifa protestor

3 home runs and 9 strike-outs is some create-a-player stats

Christmas commercials play on October 17th now because the world is in a rush for us to die

Got em

Graphic design has never surpassed this

This came out while I was in college and once I heard it the first time I would call and request it while I was driving every single night

When this guy eventually dies he’s just gonna explode into drunk bats

Oh you just figured out Johnny Cash was cool? The guy who famously performed for a prison and dressed in all black? Well CONGRATULATIONS TO THE WALL STREET JOURNAL oh wait I guess that does make sense

Halloween always a reminder that I have good takes on Freddy vs. Jason

George isn’t gonna get to make the last Mad Max movie so he’s trying to make the Wasteland happen for real

Ma’am you actually just say dumb things and people yell at you

All right enough about the blood money comedians. Let’s talk GOOD comedians. I saw @davidjroth.bsky.social link to this special once and it had me dying. youtu.be/g9NT46SGqFY?...

Tech companies are revolutionizing the world of elder abuse

I feel like this description does it a disservice. It’s still a smart-dumb show with fun sci-fi, it just focuses more on being a family sitcom. Anyway, good show

Ahh I see now, they were busy planning trips to Riyadh

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I am gonna have a brain hemorrhage

Well of course he’s looking out for Argentina, he’s gonna have to hide out there someday

Mfer eating people wearing Sambas

Just gonna give conservatives a heads up that if they actually make statues like this on campuses they are gonna exist solely for college students to do bits

An important part of any memorial is to take a “fun one”

I know people have said it a lot over the years but this is quite literally a joke from Idiocracy

I have missed a lot that’s happened in this franchise