Tanya
@tanya.bsky.social
π€ 3469
π₯ 314
π 1261
a loser and a coward
Stop saying the US is invading Venezuela for the oil. The US is invading Venezuela for the love of the game
10 days ago
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2026 predictions: - Biden dies (old age) - Trump dies (7th assassination attempt) - anti-aging billionaire dies (chokes on a carrott) - Taylor Swift dies (private jet is a boeing) - Drake dies (testicular cancer) - Musk dies (tesla explodes)
13 days ago
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it's the war on Christmas and we're bringing democracy to the north pole
about 1 month ago
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maybe the hamburger helper is just dressing for the job he wants
about 1 month ago
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i love dating. i love finding out that i'm not good enough over and over
about 1 month ago
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a dating app where they just mail you some rope
about 1 month ago
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no i love it when you watch my stories but don't text back it's hot
about 1 month ago
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taking fentanyl just so i can touch police officers
about 1 month ago
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BREAKING: my heart
about 1 month ago
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reposted by
Tanya
Tim Onion
about 1 month ago
Okay gang, The Onion is 80 sign-ups away from our 60,000th print subscriber. This would put us in contention for the Top 10 most circulated newspapers in the U.S. So! We're giving our 60,000th subscriber a mystery box by our archivist as a nice lil thank you. Sign up now. I'd give it an hour.
loading . . .
Join The Onion
Donβt just read the news. Feel it. Be among the first to feel the news.
https://membership.theonion.com
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a hot guy getting CTE is like a hot girl getting a BBL. stop it, you were already perfect
about 1 month ago
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[texting my sister] ... and is there a mister carriage?
about 1 month ago
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i met with a trauma surgeon but he said he couldn't do anything about my childhood
about 1 month ago
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i need to hire the witch who cursed me because she did a very good job
about 1 month ago
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thank god i'm so lazy. if not i would have killed myself dozens of times by now
about 1 month ago
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a dating app where they just mail you a gun
about 1 month ago
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here for a time
about 1 month ago
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they should make a dating app that works
about 1 month ago
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magazines used to be cool. they used to be about touching girls butts and the desperate attempt to save 33 men trapped underground. now they're only about CEOs and semen retention
about 1 month ago
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they should make ignoring me illegal
about 1 month ago
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excited to announce that i'm dating a professional surfer (couch)
about 1 month ago
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awesome
3 months ago
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i can't believe it's already been a month since joe biden passed away
3 months ago
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the lion is very concerned with how things seem to be going
3 months ago
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but your honor my client was the birthday girl
4 months ago
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[dying of a totally preventable disease]... tell my sister i lover her... [cough]... and ... make an ai of me where i have an absolutely huge dumper... m-make that thing hu[cough violently for 30 full seconds]
4 months ago
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they leaked an ai video of me as the bottom half of a horse
4 months ago
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i'd like to see an ai do THIS [loses hope in an unfathomably new way]
4 months ago
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bet he won't even get to Level 2 by the 6th week
add a skeleton here at some point
4 months ago
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is bluesky good yet
4 months ago
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woke up in the middle of the night to draw a reverse cowgirl
4 months ago
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when you're being nice to me this is who you're being nice to
5 months ago
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[replying to my sister's text] ...and is there a mister carriage?
5 months ago
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wow i can't believe ghislaine maxwell committed suicide next week
5 months ago
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does anyone know anything
6 months ago
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it was a complicated 17 hour surgery but they finally managed to separate the art from the artist
6 months ago
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hey sorry i'm late for work it's just that i hate my job
6 months ago
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2025 predictions: - Biden dies (old age) - Trump dies (7th assassination attempt) - Anti-aging billionaire dies (chokes on a carrot) - Taylor Swift dies (private jet is a boeing) - Drake dies (testicular cancer) - Musk dies (tesla explodes)
about 1 year ago
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i actually read the Odyssey in the original greek. complete waste of time, i have no idea what those symbols mean
about 1 year ago
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thanks to inflation, Subway is now measuring the footlong from the taint
about 1 year ago
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phone, wallet, keys, manifesto
about 1 year ago
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about 1 year ago
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reposted by
Tanya
Travis Nichols
about 1 year ago
Category is: Snatch the Fed
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ron paul's drab show
about 1 year ago
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just invented a thing called a mentaur, it's like a centaur but it's half man half man
about 1 year ago
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[convincing a zoomer to wear a condom] babe you gotta spotify wrap it
about 1 year ago
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a girl gang called the bloods, slogan is "girls who cycle together stay together"
about 1 year ago
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[dating president biden] would you still pardon me if i was a worm
about 1 year ago
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what if that coldplay song was about piss
about 1 year ago
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for whom the doom scrolls
about 1 year ago
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