It's not JUST that Artax dies; it's the realization that Artax has been sad this whole time and we didn't notice because he is a horse.

Why do we have to keep listening to reporters pretend that this man did not have a serious neurological event and is now basically a sausage?

Just saying, "Hundred-yard gash" was RIGHT THERE and they went with "300 foot split"

Eeeeee! I've been looking forward to this for a long time.

All I actually want for father's day is to hear myself think again.

Okay but it will be grimly amusing when we hear how "nice agents once again shot an unarmed woman in the head while calling her a bitch"

It's honestly hard to believe there will be any future generations at this point. Trump's last act in office is probably going to be to launch all the nukes, just to ensure no one ever replaces him

This man looks like: 1. He's about to berate Matilda for reading instead of watching telly. 2. A transporter accident involving Hercule Poirot and The Kingpin 3. He's about to be bested by Michael Knight, MacGyver, the A-Team and/or Airwolf 4. The Planeteers are about to let their powers combine

PIN requirements on an account: "6 numbers, no repeats, no more than two sequential" This may be the worst security I have ever seen.

King Canute orders the tide to turn back.

Okay but who will expunge Trump's NEXT two impeachments?

One of the odd similarities between Star Trek and Doctor Who is how many alien planets have their capitol city in walking distance of a barren wasteland full of giant monsters.

Is there any way we could declare Elon to be the winner of Capitalism and give him a trophy and then stop doing capitalism and get on with our lives?

This is real btw

We regret to inform you that both the Holograms AND the Misfits have withdrawn from the Freedom 250 concert.

Just found this idea in some notes I left myself 8 years ago: "Walking simulator style video game adaptation of the movie 'Stand By Me'"

Of all the lies the GOP has told about James Talarico, "A vegan who keeps it a secret and doesn't tell anyone" is perhaps the most unbelievable.

They call themselves "alpha males" because they have lower penetrating power.

"Ah, no, you misunderstand. I'm not a beta male, I'm a betta male. Siamese fighting fish." [Flares my gills and rams you]

My son suggested that we get posters for Spaceballs and Spaceballs: The New One, and posters for Shaft (2000) and Shaft (2019), and hang them next to each other on the wall.

Meanwhile, the right is claiming that Trump is actually aging in reverse, growing younger and healthier with each passing day.

Catholics who got harassed by proddies as kids looking at that statue of Trump and thinking "Oh so NOW you know the difference between latria and dulia?"

There's only a week of Colbert shows left and I am sad about that. I'm sad about a bunch of things, but "Colbert got cancelled" is the easiest of those things to deal with right now. (I'm much sadder about things like the government and my mom being dead)

At some point, Google Maps started giving me hilariously incorrect directions because it decided I could drive my car through my house, my back yard, and down the cliff to the next street over and start from there.

It seems to me like the rpgmaker-made games which achieve prominence generally are not really jrpgs as the platform is designed form, but end up being something else, usually something more akin to a visual novel that just has a (vaguely) jrpg-like overworld to structure the story

Many ways, very poorly; enough to maintain power; he will be caught red-handed but no one in power will do anything about it.

They spent a lot of time insisting that DEI hires were unqualified just to turn around and lower their standards pretty much across the board in order to find enough people willing to work for them

RFK jr wants hospitals to stop serving jello because it has sugar. I assume now if you have issues swallowing, they will feed you a cube of beef tallow.

Is it just me or has there been a HUGE uptick in marketing emails from companies you've done business with? Technically "bacn" rather than "spam", but the past few weeks, it's gone from a couple a week to 15 every few hours.

-ola is one of those dated meaningless marketing suffixes like -arama, but somehow "granola" gets a bye and is allowed to be a respectable name for something.

How did a major genre of AI-generated facebook reels become "That nightmare you've had since middle school where your skin is full of holes in a honeycomb pattern"?

This is an excuse for me to remind you that in the Berenstain Bears universe, there was a Bear Revolutionary War with Bear Washington and Bear Cornwallis, and a Bear WWII with Bear Doughboys, and a Bear Last Supper with Bear Judas. They don't actually show Bear Hitler or Bear Jesus, but...

My son just referred to a person who communes with ghosts as a "spiritual median"

This Virtual Game Card thing Nintendo came up with is super clever, because my kids lost their switch and now the games we bought are inaccessable forever.

ok the Mr. Beast lawsuit, let’s go. step 1: don’t do this, or this, or this, or this

Losing a parent is probably the worst thing that happens to the largest number of people. Like, there are many things that are worse, but they happen to fewer people. For example, losing a spouse is worst than losing a parent, but I bet no more than 50% of people go through that.

An awkward request: neither google nor chatgpt has been able to identify this. I saw a play in Baltimore between 1997 and 2001 at a respectable theatre, probably Centre Stage, about female genital mutilation in northern Africa. I can't recall the name of the play. Any chance anyone knows it?

Here's something no one tells you about losing a loved one: The day after they die is the first day in a long time that will be better than the previous day.

Today I learned that the guy who played El Guapo in The Three Amigos was the director of Like Water for Chocolate, that weird magical realism movie you had to watch for college-level Spanish class.

A Universe, 1949-2026 If you accept the "many worlds" interpretation of quantum mechanics, you are in a sense giving up the idea of "the universe" or even "a universe", really. Rather, you, as a subjectiveness, occupy a cloud of universes simultaneously. You actually occupy every universe that…

Palantir are about six months away from ordering their employees to leave audio logs scattered around their offices

If we all keep using AI for silly frivolous things, but refuse to subscribe to paid plans or buy AI products, will the resulting money-hole pop the AI bubble faster than if we all just try to boycott it?

I look at the French Horn and wonder "How did they decide to go with exactly this number of twisties?" Like at some point they were like "This needs another twisty" and then later they transitioned to "If I add more twisties, it will be too many"

The thing they're definitely going to learn is "The right candidate to beat a far-right candidate is a slightly-less-far-right candidate"

What amazed me the most is the lack of self-preservation in the moneyed classes. I'm not rich. I'm definitely doing better than most, though. And even at that level, my fear of the system collapsing and humanity resorting to cannibalism is enough to make me a leftist.

I dunno, man, if you're trying to make people forget that your leader is a pedophile, attacking the Catholic Church might be a little "They lady doth protest too much".

It's wild the way inflation fucks with my mind. If my kids want some knick-knack that costs $20, that feels outrageous but then I spend $120 on dinner for four.

The problem with the narrative of "They won't 25th Trump until 2 years and a day because they don't want Vance to be term-limited" breaks down in the fact of the fact that no one in their right mind thinks Vance could get elected a nonzero number of times.

If I am being completely honest, I did sorta stop caring about the Epstein files for the past two days when it appeared that we were about to commit an unprovoked nuclear war. But the "ceasefire" frees me up to go back to caring.