Once upon a time I thought relationship harmony was found in sameness, but it’s also found in difference - where your strengths meet their ‘weaknesses’, and vice versa. My closest bonds don’t mirror me; they steady me. We share values, but our differences create a balance that feeds our connection.

Jealousy may show up as sabotage in disguise. Some ppl know they can’t reach your level, so they will try to pull you down to theirs. They provoke, poke, and prod, hoping you’ll lose your composure and ruin your reputation in the process. Sometimes the best form of retaliation is rising above it.

Ppl who have been misunderstood enough, eventually stop explaining themselves. They let others believe what they want because they realise assumptions come from projections. Instead of correcting false narratives, their priority is protecting their peace and joy.

If you snap at everyone who attempts to offer you constructive feedback or correction, then you will live life embarrassing yourself or making unnecessary mistakes with zero awareness. Feedback and correction encourages learning and improvement. When you reject both, you reject growth.

Being a creative means you’ll look back at your old work and cringe. But that ‘cringe’ is proof that you were brave enough to try, to experiment, to step outside your comfort zone. It’s a necessary part of your journey. Without that awkward beginning, there’s no evolution, and definitely no success…

Kindness over niceness, but also, being nice doesn’t mean being fake. The real win? Being both. Kind in intentions and nice in delivery. Because how you package your kindness (tone, timing, and approach) also matters. Some people are good at heart but careless with their words…

Some ppl feel emotionally unfulfilled in friendships because they select friends solely for strategic social advancement. They don’t asses character or values enough. They choose based on profession, looks, or popularity… Superficial friendships won’t feed you. Unless you’re superficial of course.

Men with Peter Pan syndrome avoid adult responsibilities. They’re the 40 yr olds with a 20-something party mindset - fleeing commitment but craving admiration. Overall, their lives lack depth and they often gravitate towards much younger ppl. It’s not about being youthful. They don’t wanna grow up.

Relationship burnout is a real thing. When a romantic relationship or friendship demands lots of emotional labour while lacking reciprocity; it’s easy to feel exhausted. Mismatched needs, emotional neglect, and one sided effort isn’t sustainable long term. You WILL eventually burn out.

You can learn a lot about a person’s character by how they show up when things are going GREAT for you, not just when things go wrong. Ppl with hidden envy / resentment struggle to celebrate major wins, but they’ll gladly show up in your sadness. Who is there for you when you’re at your happiest?

If someone close to you is easily influenced into disliking you by someone else, and they don’t even reach out to hear your side - it’s likely they already held some quiet resentment towards you. The new influence just gave them permission to act on it!

If you want to encourage other people to take you seriously, then YOU have to take you seriously. Don’t disregard your boundaries, don’t put yourself down, don’t dismiss your needs. How you treat yourself sends a message to others. Hold yourself in the highest regard.

Happy Mother’s Day to everyone celebrating! ❤️

Celebrate your successes but don’t let them define you.

I love that ‘Adolescence’ on Netflix addresses a very real and disturbing issue affecting society. The camera work was great and the acting was compelling and raw. I just wish the wider impact of the crime was explored more. Some scenes felt drawn out too, but still a good watch.

I love my sister 🥹

Episode 6 of #ToniToldMe is live! Listen to ‘Fine Girls Do Finance’ - audioalways.lnk.to/tonitoldmeTT

God is always RIGHT ON TIME for me. When I worry that I don’t have a solution, a solution will eventually be provided - right on time!!! 😭 🙏🏾

Defence mechanisms might feel like they work but they can often do more harm than good…

Random but, one celebrity who is even more gorgeous in real life is Ciara. She’s beautiful in pics and videos but in real life??? Her beauty is something else!

You asked for ‘Toni Told Me’ YouTube videos and we’ve delivered! The first video will be premiering at 5pm UK time (11am EST). youtu.be/KTrh5xjsdU0

No expectations = low disappointment.

Being a ‘Jack of all trades’ can feel overwhelming but who says you have to focus on becoming a master of one thing? Multi-skilled individuals who have the courage to explore their talents are unstoppable! Embrace your versatility. Being interested in many things isn’t a weakness. It’s a strength.

lmao no, TikTok users are not moving to Bluesky. They would literally rather learn Mandarin than learn how to read a feed of text posts. This is a millennial retirement home.

It’s about time! ‘Toni Told Me’ is my new podcast, bringing you your weekly dose of big sister advice. Sometimes you’ll get me on my own, and other times you’ll get me with special guests! Launching Tuesday 14th January 😃😆 I can’t wait!!! #tonitoldme

let me repost this instead of copy and pasting bar for bar 🙊 good to see you here Toni !!

Ever met someone who seems deeply emotional and completely detached at the same time? They feel things intensely and have so much love to give but it’s as if they’ve locked it away. Their perspective on the world reveals a depth of emotion but the way they guard their heart makes them appear numb…

Just finished ‘Dark Matter’. I really enjoyed it despite the holes in the plot. For example, there were so many copies of Jason 1 but what about the copies of Jason 2??? Very confusing.

You don’t have to like me, because Jesus loves me 🙏🏾

Who’s seen ‘Missing You’ on Netflix? The acting was good but boy oh boy that storyline! Everything was going on 😅

British Airways’ voluntary but inevitable detonation of its frequent flyer scheme today means that only the most tragically locked-in passengers need bother prioritising flying BA. As I’ve said before, airlines don’t really care for your loyalty and you shouldn’t either. Just fly whoever you like.

Not to get too deep about something like Tier points, but there is something about British Airways now which embodies a hollowed out management consultancy led, computer says no approach to service that pervades business and frustrates so many people and diminishes loyalty.

The wildest part of BA’s loyalty scheme change is that many ppl stuck with them despite better options, just for the Executive Club. Now, why not fly Qatar, Air France, Singapore, Virgin, or Emirates? For me, BA will no longer be my first choice unless their tickets get significantly cheaper...

I don’t know who needs this but 2025 is a year of no comparisons. No beating yourself up over things you don’t have yet. Let this year be one of faith. Especially in your own journey. Certain things are meant for YOU and nobody else. Let 2025 be a year of alignment and readiness for YOUR blessings.

2024 was a YEAR!

True statement that often makes me feel terribly sad ashamed of the world we live in. 😪🙏

Love it when I see a woman who has been through the trenches, get a happy fresh start. You deserve it boo ♥️

I can’t take all this Black beauty 😍

Down with *UnitedWealthCare* Up with Universal Health Care. 💙

After some Costco shareholders asked the company to end its DEI policies, this was their response: “Our board has considered this proposal and believes that our commitment to an enterprise rooted in respect and inclusion is appropriate and necessary." This explains why Costco is an industry leader!

I cried when I watched ‘The Six Triple Eight’ on Netflix… I love that their story is global now, but it hurt me to think about how so many of those women have passed away, and didn’t get their credit or flowers when they were alive. A tale as old as time 😔

I love seeing couples who are actual friends to each other. Not a relationship based solely on duty / societal expectations, but one based on mutual understanding, laughter, shared experiences, shared interests etc. I genuinely think these are the happiest relationships. Seems like ppl agree too…

The way some of you are traumatising your kids with that Elf on the Shelf… That creepy looking elf will never enter my house! 🤣

One thing about my Dad… He loves him some Korean tv! 🤣🤣🤣 The last five shows he has completed have all been Korean. I gotta take him to Seoul one day.

Cheating doesn’t ’just happen’; it’s a series of deliberate decisions. Whether it’s walking or driving somewhere, texting, meeting, opening a door… At each step there’s an opportunity to choose differently. So never believe someone who says “it just happened”. Cheating is a choice, not an accident.

I used to think marriage was purely about love, but many of us are capable of loving people who aren’t necessarily great longterm partners for us. You have to consider a person’s values, work ethic, money habits, crisis management style, discipline level, and so much more. Love alone isn’t enough.

Everything I said I wanted was available to me. God just needed to see that my belief in him, and myself, was stronger than the disbelief people threw at me.

Feels like everyone is on a ski trip right now.

Transparency is important in all relationships, but particularly in long distance relationships!