Me watching other people's kids happily engaging with the teacher during swimming lessons

Going for a full episode start to finish tonight 🤞

I've found the trick to raising a happy toddler is to just give him whatever he wants

I'm just saying if Sturko was an NDP plant on a mission to infiltrate and destroy BC's right wing parties, what would she be doing differently

My bike was making a weird scraping noise for like 4 months and I didn't do anything about it and finally just went away on its own. Good life lesson really.

I get half an hour to myself in the evenings after the kids are in bed and chores are done so I'm watching Alien Earth chaos style: in 30 minute chunks without regard for episode beginnings and ends

Who funds the octonauts???

We need to put the people who design collapsible strollers in charge of other aspects of our society because they've really figured that one out

The 3 year old had a 10/10 meltdown at dinner and refused to touch his salmon. An hour later we get him back to the table and he takes a bite and literally his first words were "hmmm not bad". I lost my shit.

Best bit in my household right now is whenever the baby wakes up I tell my wife we have a Woke Baby

This has proved so successful that I've expanded it to potato chips as well. Turns out lying to your kids rocks

Pardon me?

It brings me no pleasure to admit that Justin Trudeau was probably the only national leader built for this moment

Sitting in a coffee shop listening to the two baristas bitching about a third. Nothing better in life

This is probably the best piece of reporting out of a mainstream outlet in Vancouver that I can remember. Absolutely nails the vpd. Really needs a more dramatic headline

Lol overcontributing to your TFSA by $200k, investing in penny stocks, losing all your money then being unable to pay the tax penalties is not really a "small" mistake ca.finance.yahoo.com/news/small-t...

My biggest movie pet peeve is people paddling canoes in bad ways. Lilly dippers all. This must be how the gun freaks feel

A nice thing about gentle parenting is when you really have to lay the hammer down the kids look at you like they just experienced the wrath of god

My mom highlighted a passage in her physical copy of The Atlantic to let me know I'm not using emojis how the youths are using them

When I was 20 living with other idiot 20 year olds we had a "system" where we took turns doing dishes. One guy got mad at me for doing the dishes too quickly instead of waiting for them to pile up like the other guys did and said I was cheating

Lmao who leaves this in an apartment lobby

Everyone knows that when bouncing a baby you need to find their resonant frequency. What many new parents don't realize is you have to bounce them out of phase. If you bounce them in phase they'll explode like the Tacoma narrows bridge

I reject job applicants who do this with their resumes even though I don't use an LLM for screening. I'm ok with people adding hidden keywords, but beyond that it just makes you look untrustworthy

This is so ugly! Are they going to spruce it up at all?

Woke the baby up by cracking a beer. Don't tell my wife

I need more podcasts. What happened to the good podcasts

Working on figuring out how to get the older kid to daycare and myself to work on time now that we have a baby in the house. Everything works like a charm as long as I don't shower, eat breakfast, or even glance at myself in a mirror.

A fun thing about having a second kid is that for the first couple of months you're allowed to act like no one else has ever had to deal with two (2) children at the same time before

Haven't had a P49 raddler yet this summer. Starting to question decision to have kids

All complaints about living in Vancouver negated when I can bike to the beach with the boy in like 5 minutes

Me: Asks my three year old a simple yes or no question Kid: Incomprehensible head motion from which I have to infer his opinion and god help me if I guess wrong

Unfortunately unusable in Vancouver because it doesn't tell you how much it's going to rain, only whether it's going to rain.

Lmao The Current did a segment on the pleasures of smoking cigarettes this morning

I was having foot pain so I bought new shoes and new insoles but it turns out I just had a piece of glass in my foot? For like six months??

We have an IVF baby and I'm happy others will have the same opportunity. We could only afford it because of private insurance.

Department Q on Netflix is good but it's the absolute worst offender for "everything is orange and teal" I've ever seen

Don't make me do a Justin Trudeau "miss me yet?" meme. I really don't want to do it

Absolute classic of the genre

Since bringing the new baby home from the hospital my wife has upped the white noise machine from "747 at takeoff" to "Saturn V rocket".

Took six whole days of having a newborn at home before the older kid brought home a daycare bug. Longer than expected!

Uncomfortable with the #1 pick in the NBA draft having the same haircut as me

Much like the solution to the housing crisis is to build new 40 year old buildings, we need to figure out how to make all children second childs

When your first baby screams you worry about what you're doing wrong. When your second baby screams you're just grateful he's not asking why he can't have a popsicle for breakfast like your 3 year old

Absolutely enthralled by this murder case. www.theguardian.com/australia-ne...

This couple has spent 3 years fine tuning their toddler's bedtime routine so that he goes right to bed and sleeps a solid 11 every night. Now watch what happens when a newborn is introduced to the house

Send the octonauts to the Hague for randomly having 20 minute episodes without warning

Old man status update: I think I have arthritis in my big toe.

Betting the house on the Pacers

I'm just going to be putting my kid's leftovers in the fridge and then tossing them a week later for the next 15 years aren't I

The octonauts are imperialists. Mind your own business nerds