Seriously, that is the kind of effort we haven't seen in WWE for years. Everyone selling everyone else's moves, a low blow, the soccer equivalent of a kickout on 2.999, someone throws the Austrians a steel chair, bam! cover! Cut to the logo.

THIS IS ONE OF THE BEST WORKS IN SPORTS HISTORY.

BAH GOD! RIYAD MAHREZ WITH THE LOW BLOW!

HOLDS IT! HOLDS IT!

Though I think this game was fairly legit, I do wonder how Algeria dribbling this out to screw over another Muslim nation might go over.

2-2.

Austria doing its part to make this look legit!

He's gonna take that personally.

Algeria levels it just before the half.

Also, #HappyBirthdayMelBrooks.

Austria doesn't think it's a damn show, they think it's a damn fight!

Arnautovich? More like Arnauto-throwingthisgame?

I believe it was 2012 where the IOC kicked out several people from the mixed doubles badminton for throwing matches to affect the knockout bracket.

I hope Algeria goes all gas no brakes for 1982. Will they? I have my doubts.

Congo with two second-half goals and as it stands, Korea is going out.

Dammit, another Domingo sketch?

Great Moments in VAR: They're chalking off a great goal because of an inadvertant hand to the face that occurred in the OPPOSITE HALF OF THE FIELD.

Uzbekistan takes the lead for real this time!

Uzbekistan scores in just 21 seconds but it's thrown out for offside.

In case you were ever wondering where that comes from, it's the "Germany's Most Disturbing Home Videos" episode of "Sprockets" on SNL, at the 2:50 mark. dai.ly/x9p5ey

Look, ze pain is so intense he has to vomit.

Well, that's it for Scotland everyone.

Dammit. Panama goal thrown out for offside or else we would have had an official "American millenial World Cup where everybody gets to score."

Wait, Wes McCauley does soccer too?

Vlasic ... pickles up a game-winner for the Croats!

CHANNEL 5 ACCUSTRIKER OLLIE WATKINS COMES INTO THE GAME!

#ENG The Big Red ... Captain

Jude takes a sad song and makes it better for England.

What is Tyrone Mings doing in the VIP box?

These chimes they keep playing have me confused if there was a goal somewhere or a second call for the discus.

All those Middle Eastern airlines I'll never be able to afford to fly to latitudes that will burn me to a crisp in 10 minutes.

Come with me and you'll be In a world of natural hydration Lift your hand and you'll feel All of the precipitation Still we'll pause just because Of a Fox commercial obligation Grab a snack, take a pee While we count our ad money...

So it's raining and cool in New Jersey and 90s and everyone's sweating their bollocks off throughout England? Did we end up doing a "Freaky Friday" for the weather?

Kind of curious what happened to the Alan Parsons Project at the World Cup. Did Michael Jordan take it personally?

Mexico and Portugal are going to be on opposite sides (or at least quarters) of the knockout stage bracket, which means we should just replace them with Colombia today and do "OPEN WIDE FOR SOME SOCCER!" www.youtube.com/watch?v=HV0U...

Is that what the whole moving to Hammond thing is about? Because I don’t think that’s the small town aesthetic they should be going for.

If I’m reading the table correctly, Iran would make it barring all three groups going against them tomorrow, which would probably be something like Croatia winning, DR Congo winning and a close or drawn Algeria-Austria game. I think Korea needs at least one two of those and Scotland all three.

I’d say the end of this game was drunk but it’s Egypt vs. Iran so probably not.

VARred off for offside. Not like the Iranians might have grounds to blame a conspiracy or anything.

Injury time winner for Team Melli?

Rob Green is doing color on this game, isn’t he?

Fair, but we need to tend to our own house first. Looking at you, Bowling Green.

And if you're a glutton like me, both! Got any recommendations, @bruceciskie.bsky.social ?

Another good point worth considering. There are no fewer than three World Cups (1994, 2002, 2014) in which the US fell ass-backwards into the knockout rounds, two because of games in which Portugal got first-half (and in the case of 2002 second-half) red cards.

This. I'd rather Pulisic didn't get nutmegged to set up a game-winning stoppage-time goal but that's not something anyone's going to be thinking about in a World Cup elimination game. They stayed on the front foot, they were creative, they were engaged and their backups were sloppy in the back.