Damn, not Lindsay Graham?! They move fast!

It's been far too long, Americans deserve to know why Mitch McConnell has been a shitty senator his entire life.

I used to stream Fortnite on Twitch and experimented with turning the game feed into a giant "green screen" by keying out green and putting my face behind the footage. It was absolutely startling when people would forget and see my giant face pop up where grass or loot should be.

I keep seeing claims that Mitch McConnell has been declared brain dead. Cool but does anyone know why he's in the hospital?

Likelihood of Elon Musk's autocomplete suggesting the n-word over time

Tenuous peace talks with Iran this week to reopen the strait of reflection.

Ever ad from the 90s was like

Like him or hate him, you have to admit Elon Musk is now the world's dumbest bitch.

Why is it that people who like to deny, downplay and take credit for ending slavery never want to commemorate the ending of slavery?

Happy pride month!

I'm tired of people complaining about American healthcare. It's the best in the world as long as you don't get sick, disabled or old or have teeth or eyes you care about. Most people have two eyes, chill.

Like what…? Eating soup? bsky.app/profile/madd...

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Lot of people shitting on Stephen Miller just because he's incredibly hateful, but you might be cranky too if you spent most of your life trying to prevent a couple of boys from throwing your ring into a volcano.

When you bomb a country, destroy their military and assassinate their president, then they don't agree to "peace talks," what bargaining chips do you have? It's kind of like threatening to shoot someone you've already shot. You have no chips. Art of the deal baby!

Guys, after carefully thinking about it, doing coke off a toilet seat, getting a brain parasite from eating road kill, getting mercury poisoning by eating too much tuna and becoming addicted to heroin in college, I have discovered the cause of autism: Tylenol.

Obviously @maddox.xmission.com, but I'm not gonna talk about him like he's not here.

Hey guys, I'm skipping my son's wedding today to discuss war plans for a war we already won three months ago to allegedly disarm a regime that was already disarmed last June. Everything is going fine.

The left is mad because despite all their protesting, they can't deny that life has become significantly better under this president for Americans who like to fuck children and Americans who are okay with those who do.

Every website: "Hi, I'm Fucko! I'll be your AI virtual assistant. Ask me anything!" Me: asking for literally anything Fucko: I can't help with that!

I like to make a meme with layers, as Rick Harrison has personally co-signed this bullshit.

Things that society has largely deemed acceptable behavior: -It's acceptable to torture mosquitoes to any degree -It's acceptable to bully the McDonald's CEO for eating wrong -It's acceptable to bully Cybertruck drivers

I'm deep in the trenches every day

On the front page of Reddit for this banger again. +24k

It has been almost 3 years to the day, and this is still one of the most embarrassing tweets ever made.

The more familiar you are with the inside of a Cybertruck, the less familiar you are with the inside of a woman.

When the framers of the constitution wrote the first amendment, they meant free speech except for a specific arrangement of sea shells in sand. If you arrange sea shells to represent four forbidden numbers, then you can be indicted by the entire force of the US federal government.

I've mostly migrated to other platforms, but I still mill about Twitter to shepherd my followers elsewhere, and to occasionally dunk on one of the most legendary losers on the planet.

Did you know that US Secretary of Commerce, Howard Lutnick, was not in his office in the World Trade Center on 9/11 because he took his son Kyle to school, narrowly missing death, which allowed him to visit Epstein's island in December of 2012?

Guy Fieri is the Joe Rogan of Food Network.

Breaking: US jobs numbers for month of March have been revised downward.

My buddy @chadkultgen.bsky.social and I just released a new episode of Sol Ringers where we discuss some of the best bangers everyone is sleeping on. Play these or go to hell. www.youtube.com/watch?v=kOSk...

bsky.app/profile/madd... 💀💀💀🏆

That's totally disrespectful. Imagine you worked hard your entire life to create a company that manufactures trash cans only to have someone throw Pam Bondi's face in it.

If you support MAGA and feel betrayed that gas prices are up, grocery prices are up, coffee has become unaffordable, you're losing health insurance and we're embroiled in another war, there's something you can do!

Every other short / reel on social media has the hardest-hitting, grittiest/dark phonk you've ever heard and it's just playing over "top 5 low-calorie snacks for the kids to enjoy on summer break"

RIP to Chuck Norris! Back in the late 2000s, Maddox / @maddox.xmission.com wrote a book called The Alphabet of Manliness? Well, here is my autographed copy, with a chapter on the martial arts master himself. Old school. #ChuckNorris #RIP #CultActor #CanonFilms

I would love to see the fridge of an IPA drinker to see what they really drink when they're not pretending to like IPAs.

AITA for going to war without consulting my allies, but expecting them to be on the hook for the cost of said war?

now my night is ruined

DLSS 5 looks amazingly

New, from the anti-pronoun crowd: "It's not a war, it identifies as a special operation."

Hey cool, now we're bombing "just for fun." This is a real thing said by Pedolf. We've spent $11.3 billion in munitions in the first week of the war alone. So we're going to war and spending billions, putting the entire region in conflict, putting lives at risk "just for fun"?

Getting ready for Iran to strike Los Angeles like

Protect the children! Oops, jk!

The oligarchs developing AI-tech that will be used in the mechanized law-enforcement of the near-future will put back doors in their systems to give them impunity for the laws they break. The corruption will be embedded into the system.

Man, if I had an electric car company, it sure would be convenient for me to put a megalomaniacal sociopath in power to go to war in the middle east. That would cause gas prices to spike, which would increase demand for my EV cars. I bet I'd become a trillionaire if I did that.

It's nice to see that people of all political backgrounds can set aside their differences and come together to bully the CEO of McDonald's.

Get ready to ruin your panties nerds, my buddy Chad and I are starting a Magic the Gathering show. If you're not into MTG, good. More cards for us. www.youtube.com/watch?v=MmD5...

Any opportunity to repost this banger