Please send any and all business inquiries to kevkageneedsalife at gmail

I do this for you. And me, mostly

Great day to help folks who need it. Thanks Jeff!

I did not have a dessert plate today, but I did just eat half a box of Wendy’s Baconator flavored Cheez-Its, putting a squirt of Salsa Picante Tabasco sauce on each cracker. I understand this makes me unfit for society. I accept that

Shoutout to the new Munchkins commercial. 10/10

Sing it, sister

I’m thankful for Bluesky! I wasn’t into ThemeParkTwitter but thought I’d get a fresh start here, and while I do miss some people and updates from the bad place, I’m excited to have made a bunch of new Internet (and some IRL) pals! Thanks for being such a lovely bunch and hope y’all have a great day

I would like to call more attention to this video that you absolutely should watch! Bonus: it’s actually quite good and not like the trash I make and try to sell you on!

lol. 12 monthly payments of just $150 a month!

Haven't watched a second yet but I can already tell, this is the kind of content I'm here for

This is a great look, actually. Just needs some makeup and a little crown and it's Al Pithy Party

“You want to fast forward a parade? Run in the opposite direction” - Mitch Hedberg

I love this so much

I’m not even kidding, like three weeks ago I said my christmas wish was to have a Baked Alaska. VIVA BAKED ALASKA

The server said I am the 7th Viking on the planet to try this. A+

Mythos is dead. Long live Mythos

Breakfast of champions

When I was 12 years old I got Donkey Kong Country for Super Nintendo for Christmas after receiving a VHS tape in the mail about how baller the game would be. Now I’m falling asleep as the physical embodiment of Mine Cart Madness watches over me. Bonkers

Bar Helios is something else

lol it says “free” almost everywhere else

Room with a view. Absolutely ridic. See ya never

Had a delightful time with @sjlem.me at Universal Studios today, which is wild considering she convinced me to go on the Fallon ride for the first time

Having fun today. Looking forward to tomorrow

Six months after opening, I spent the day at Epic Universe. Still marinating in it to clarify some opinions, but off the cuff - it’s everything I hoped it’d be and often not what I expected it to be. We had a lovely day that’s inaccessible at press to a lot of people. More to follow, but an Epic day

I liked Mine Cart Madness more than Monsters Unchained?

In a few short hours I will be at Epic Universe for the first time. It’s maybe the last new park at this scale I will see in my lifetime, and it’s my first brand new experience since Hard Rock Park almost 20 years ago. These moments don’t come often. If you can make it happen, make it happen

This is the kind of clutch we rarely saw from our beloved Donovan. I’m all in on this next era of Jazz*!! *I did lose my Jazz water bottle today

If Volcano Bay has a million fans, then I am one of them. If Volcano Bay has ten fans, then I am one of them. If Volcano Bay has only one fan then that is me. If Volcano Bay has no fans, then that means I am no longer on Earth. If the world is against Volcano Bay, then I am against the world

Just broke a 66 day crossword streak because of a stupid british idiom and

I love Cabana Bay and the suite is clutch but being able to hear the person in the next room snoring is a first for me, personally

At least once a year, I eat cereal until I’m sick

All these foos getting on the plane with Mickey and Snow White shirts best have an Epic excursion planned

Just saw Charo in the airport and need to be resuscitated

This is really my driving motivation, pardon the swear

what we’ve all been hating for

Holiday long-sleeved tees. UGLY IS SUBJECTIVE

This is excellent

Time to put the holiday Poo-Pourri out

If you got five minutes and want to watch something incredibly stupid, you'll love this

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bingo. why i don't mind the "traitor" comments thrown at me for abandoning the Mets almost eight years ago. i'm watching the best player in the history of the world and several other incredible talents on a regular basis 15 minutes from my house thanks to a franchise that isn't stupid

A year ago was awful. But we’ve got a year behind us and a glimpse of hope for the future. Give yourself a second tonight to think about everything you’ve done in the past year to help the cause - fundraising, volunteering, getting involved or just surviving. You deserve credit. Sun’s comin up.

already one of the top regimes we've had based on this alone!

That’s what’s up

Definitely worth seeing if you’re in NYC and generally worth seeing if you’re not!

#Dodgers parade Monday 11am #MLB

Sports at its best

For any of my followers who are interested in this sort of thing, there are about to be many drunk shirtless men pouring champagne all over each other on your local Fox station

Beating the Yankees feels so much better