I remember in 2006 when Larry Summers was talking about how women aren’t that good at math. I can’t believe it took 20 years and Epstein to get that fucker out of education.

You know what, I’m gonna start kicking people in the shins, then I’ll proclaim that I’ve taken responsibility for my actions and we can all move on

Damn, I’d kill for a Chicago style hot dog right now. And a ginger ale.

Lol at a resident that just told me “I learned critical thinking in my four years of med school” after I explained she shouldn’t use chatGPT to search for literature and that she is legally culpable for any mistakes she makes because of her use of the tool

I thought I was indulging a craving for Cheerios but instead I was starting an intense fight with my cat for Cheerios

My dog was refusing food for a few days but now she’s eating boiled chicken like a champ!

Talking to a colleague at another institution, and I asked what union her staff was in. She had no idea. Wtf? Is that normal? That seems outrageous

I want someone to pop my leg out like it’s a Barbie leg, clean the socket, and put the leg back in

The amounts that institutions police language on behalf of “federal priorities” is not shocking but very depressing.

What the fuck kind of necklace is this? This woman is a jewelry expert on Antiques Roadshow

“Well, I worked as a traveling wall stencil-er in 80s and 90s across the Wisconsin area”

Breaking: RFK Jr. has died from a butt infection

I’m really perturbed by seeing grown men wearing jeans in a sauna.

I’ve been running routinely for three weeks and the only change so far is that I get very sleepy by 9.

I have not talked about Canada’s curling cheating in the Canadian family chat. I feel like I deserve an award for not stirring shit up even though it would be really fun.

Woman eating hard boiled eggs on the subway

Character from a lost section of The Canterbury Tales: the wife of burps

I never really heard the word “tranche” before a month ago

When we first adopted Ruby, she didn’t really like being pet. Now about 4 years later, she whines whenever I stop

My boss used AI to write a speech about someone who has worked this job for 30 years. I think he should watch that Adam Sandler movie Click and really think about it.

“Beavers are like if Yabba had a job”

The Stop’n’Shop near my apartment is an actual portal to hell

When I take over the world, I am going to make sure all academics who made anything for Masterclass are fired immediately.

I exercised for the first time since getting sick three weeks ago and 30 minutes of yoga made me feel like an accordion fully extended and then flattened out (pleasantly)

2025 was the worst year of my life so far. I hope it keeps that title for many years to come.

My job now includes teaching basic critical thinking (e.g., what is the thesis of this article) to people with Masters degrees.

I once saw Gwendolyn Christie in person and damn

I’m very perfected my leftover strategy - put it all on puff pastry with an egg on top

We’ve made it to the vet and the gabapentin has accomplished very little

I just had to dose this cat with medication. Thank god for neosporin

The bathroom door at work is making a totally different sound now and I can’t figure out why

Going into manhattan is great. I just got the meanest side eye from one twink and four blonde women simultaneously

I just had to do a panel with someone that I immediately disliked and I think they disliked me

Overheard while taking the bus: “Hey you, yeah you. You look like I know you. What’s your mom’s name?”

Are you even married if you spouse isn’t keeping up by reading madrigal lyrics?

I desperately want one of those shitty cupcakes you get in an unwieldy plastic container at a grocery store. Preferably bright pink frosting

Hmm no thank you

Called in sick, got acupuncture, and am now watching TikTok’s from a bunch of Cuomo voters while in the bath 🤌

I know this isn’t a novel observation but it is really nuts that Schumer hasn’t endorsed Mamdani. “Blue no matter who” lol

I just watched a TikTok that said dishes were a “kitchen trend making a comeback.”

It’s hard to get back to feeling good moving your body after health nonsense. I will take any fun exercise (or honestly just any kind of movement) suggestions

Few movies give you the thrill of a well executed but believable robbery like The Friends of Eddie Coyle

My biggest achievement is coming up with the movie category “Men Who Don’t Know When To Leave.”

Watching another Hammer-style horror movie tonight, and here’s a good rule of thumb - if you are a cis dude, and some lady says, “I don’t know, I think we should leave. There’s a bad vibe,” just leave.

I am definitely superstitious but I’ll say this — I’m never getting got by a witchcraft cult in an English manor while in an antiques buying trip

With all my health issues, people like to note how lucky I am to have good health insurance. While that is totally true, it really isn’t the best way to comfort someone

Paprika lentils and squash over egg noodles with dill and chive yogurt sauce. I love cold weather meals.

How can a 12 lbs cat take a shit so smelly that my entire apartment becomes uninhabitable? Like damn what is that little guy eating cause this smell can’t possibly just be from digested cat food

My dumbass republican cousin has a $90 fucking teacup on her wedding registry. A teacup!

Influencers making tiropita with only feta and no farmer’s cheese is going to be the reason I take a dive off the manhattan bridge