Our oldest turning 20 felt different than I expected. Parenting a daughter with Down syndrome has reshaped how I think about milestones, friendship, and hope. open.substack.com/pub/amyjulia...

“When your head and your habits diverge, your heart tends to follow the habits.” As we move into 2026, here’s an invitation from Justin Whitmel Earley to think about habits and rhythms that nurture health and wholeness. (Plus why I choose to eat the cheese casserole at the church potluck!)👇🏻

What does it mean for “love [for others] to be the guide into the decisions we make around food”? amyjuliabecker.com/body-soul-wh...

I suspect I’m not alone in both thinking back on 2025 and looking ahead to 2026 at this moment in time! Here are the books I loved in 2025. open.substack.com/pub/amyjulia...

Why does sleep matter spiritually? How can breathing reconnect body & soul? How do fasting, feasting, & everyday meals contribute to the spiritual life? "Why Ignoring the Body Never Works with Justin Whitmel Earley" is live now on Reimagining the Good Life🎙️S9 E7  amyjuliabecker.com/body-soul-wh...

We are in a holiday season where there is much to fear, with news of what can feel like endless tragedies. The Christmas story of a God who not only says “do not fear” but also says “I am with you always”—that is a story that is big enough to hold the suffering.

Kevan Chandler has used a wheelchair his whole life and lives with progressive dependence on others. Instead of seeing that dependence as a tragedy, he invites us to reimagine it as a path to deeper relationship, shared joy, and even hospitality.

Do not fear is a promise that God will be with us even in the midst of the most fearful, dark, & terrible moments. It can be easy for me—I’m such a rule-follower—to berate myself for fear. But with all the reasons we have to tremble in fear, we hear the reassuring words in response, “I am with you.”

Here’s what changed when 30 teenage boys met our daughter (resisting the r-word slur and honoring one another): amyjuliabecker.substack.com/i/181784057/...

Do not fear is a promise that God will be with us even in the midst of the most fearful, dark, and terrible moments. open.substack.com/pub/amyjulia...

In a season of parties and entertaining, it’s good to remember that hospitality means something very different—welcoming the stranger and caring for one another. Kevan Chandler, author of the Hospitality of Need, joins me on Reimagining the Good Life. lnkd.in/gnuGPQRN

The core message of Christmas is that we live in darkness and desperately need light that we cannot create for ourselves. That we live through grief and loss and pain and violence that we cannot rectify for ourselves. That our world is as very hopeless as it seems—unless God enters into the void.

Mary gets an exciting and troubling call from God to be the mother of Jesus. It is only after she hears her cousin Elizabeth’s words of acknowledgment, affirmation, and encouragement that Mary sings the Magnificat. Let this serve as an encouragement to us all that we can be Elizabeth to one another.

My audiobook, Small Talk: Learning From My Children About What Matters Most, is half off right now! Just $10! www.audiobooks.com/promotions/p...

We are invited to be vulnerable with the safe people in our lives, to show up with a warm welcome, to celebrate each other, to express both disappointment and delight, and to do it all with gratitude, one small step at a time.

Feeling alone in the hard parts of parenting a child with a disability? Hear how other families are finding support, encouragement, and practical ways to navigate the challenges while celebrating the joys. amyjuliabecker.com/lifeline-dis...

I was paging through Jenny Wallace’s Never Enough yesterday and loved these reminders (especially in the midst of exam season and college early decision time) of how and why to let our kids know they are beloved for who they are (not their GPA or where they get in) and they matter as they are.

Penny and I arrived in the parking lot, and I felt my anxiety engine revving in my chest. I wondered if it would be worth it to gather these students. I felt the drumbeat of my own to-do list. I worried that the whole thing would feel awkward and forced. And then…

Last year the transition to college was hard for Penny (and for me!). But I’m here to tell you… open.substack.com/pub/amyjulia...

I read Think Again a couple of weeks ago. It has a great premise—that we need to be flexible in our thinking and willing to consider changing our minds. And it is filled with ways to make sure we—and those around us—are prepared for acts of rethinking.

I'm living between merry & somber. I wonder whether this back and forth—between sparkly outfits & humble beginnings, between Amazon lists & the invitation to deep peace whatever the circumstances, between merry & bright and somber reflection—I wonder whether all of it is its own form of preparation.

What does equality look like when our bodies are not the same? Can we admit our neediness and maintain our dignity as women or as men? How does interdependence lead to a more just society? 👇🏻

I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again, I love having teenagers.

"The lie of autonomy is the idea that the basic nature of being human is to take care of yourself, to not need others, and to not have other people who depend on you." Grateful to talk with Leah Libresco Sargeant on Reimagining the Good Life.

In a culture that prizes autonomy, dependence can feel like loss. But dependence is not a flaw. It is part of what it means to be human. Leah Libresco Sargeant talks with me about how to live in the dignity of dependence: amyjuliabecker.com/feminism-dep...

Latest episode of the ERB podcast: We chatted with Kathleen Norris and @amyjuliabecker.bsky.social about disability, what it means to be human, and their experiences accompanying family members with disabilities: buff.ly/TFuJVAs

December invites both glitter and gravity. I’ve been thinking about what it means to hold joy and longing together, and how that tension might be its own form of preparation.

When people in power use the r-word to denigrate others, they belittle people with intellectual disabilities, normalize the use of slurs, suggest intellectual disability is shameful, and prop up their own positions with weak and crass appeals to our worst instincts. 1/

There’s lots of conversation right now about the roles of women and men—whether it’s the Epstein scandal or the viral “Great Feminization” essay. It’s clear we don’t quite know how to talk about gender. Leah Libresco Sargeant joins me on the podcast to talk about her book The Dignity of Dependence.

Let go of the Hallmark-movie pressure. Joy doesn't have to look like Hallmark. Instead of asking: - Is this normal? - Is this what everyone else is doing? - Is this the ideal? Ask: - Is this healthy for me? - Is this healthy for our family? If the answer is no, you’re free to let it go.

For families experiencing disability, remember your holidays don’t have to look like everyone else’s. Choose what’s healthy. Instead of asking, “Is this what everybody else is doing? Is this normal?” ask instead, “Is this healthy? For me? For our family?” If it's not, well, I'm going to let it go.

Let presence matter more than perfection. Let taking care of myself be an important part of taking care of others. Ask what it looks like to show up in love (rather than fear or worry or a need to perform).

Feeling the holiday overwhelm creep in? Psychotherapist Niro Feliciano unpacks why disability families carry extra emotional weight this time of year—and how small shifts can bring more peace. We explore how to create a holiday season that fits your family, not Instagram.

These words give me permission to live in the reality of my life & my family this holiday season. To let presence matter more than perfection. To let taking care of myself be an important part of taking care of others. To ask what it looks like to show up in love. open.substack.com/pub/amyjulia...

The best Thanksgiving conversations can begin with one good question. Here are a few questions we will be asking around our table this Thanksgiving: Who is someone not at this table you’re thankful for? Why are you thankful for people at the table? 1/

I wrote down 1 thing Sharon Hodde Miller said: “The false self walks into a room & asks, ‘Who do I need to be in order to belong?’ The true self doesn’t need to perform in order to belong.” Her words made me think about how many people with disabilities don’t seem to ask how they need to perform. 1/

Sho Baraka is a poet and dad to 2 autistic sons. He discovered that love cannot rely only on words. He says: Pay attention to the ways your child expresses connection, such as scripting lines from a favorite show or sitting quietly nearby. Receive those expressions as forms of love.

The Many Lives of Mama Love by Lara Love Hardin. It's hard to believe that a suburban mom of four boys ended up in jail with 32 felony counts against her. This book is worth reading for the many ways all of us can relate to the messy, broken, beautiful humanity on display. More👇🏻

"No study can attest to the goodness of Penny’s life or the value of her being. No list of standards can defend her existence. In a world of increasing mechanization, measurement and merit, we need people with Down syndrome among us to return us to our humanity." Grateful to write for Cognoscenti.👇🏻

Raising Boys and Girls and the Enneagram. I highly recommend this recent podcast series from David Thomas and Sissy Goff about the Enneagram and parenting. pod.link/1366344369

Going to Starbucks. Receiving a text. Making a plan for the weekend. None of these are big steps and none of them are noteworthy for most teenagers. But together they signal connection, friendship, community, belonging for our daughter with Down syndrome. open.substack.com/pub/amyjulia...

If your home feels tense or chaotic, connection might be a missing piece. Recording artist Sho Baraka reflects on his story of parenting two sons with autism and the power of proximity—how simply being with our kids can open doors to communication, trust, and calm.

What if real freedom doesn’t come from more self-esteem but from self-forgetfulness? @sharonhmiller.bsky.social explores the difference between the false self and the true self—and how thinking *about* ourselves less without thinking less *of* ourselves leads to healing, humility, and purpose.

Having a child with Down syndrome has been an irrational, unprovable good. In a world of increasing mechanization, measurement and merit, we need people like our daughter among us to return us to our humanity. Grateful to write for @cogwbur.bsky.social www.wbur.org/cognoscenti/...

The most recent annual review of states from the Department of Education concluded that only 19 of the 50 states met the requirements for serving kids with disabilities. Let’s pause on this for just a minute—that’s fewer than half of the states that meet the requirements.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: special education laws matter—for kids with disabilities, for families like ours, and for anyone who believes disability is part of our common humanity and that a just society cares for its most vulnerable. 1/

Awkward (sometimes cringey) questions about disability happen. Carrie Hahn, a pediatric speech-language pathologist & mom, joins me to share how parents can respond. We explore strategies to: 🍁navigate conversations & correct misconceptions 🍁help kids feel seen & respected w/out feeling singled out

Kids like my daughter Penny wouldn’t have been allowed in a classroom 50 years ago. Now the system that opened those doors is being dismantled. What’s happening to special education right now is alarming—and it affects all of us. open.substack.com/pub/amyjulia...

Pepper Stetler's essay about the recent funding reductions and lack of support for students with disabilities summarizes why “ending federal oversight of IDEA isn’t about giving control to the states. It is about denying the civil rights of all students with disabilities.”

For my child who will never take the SAT and for my child who will be evaluated based on that score, both need to know that... They are beloved apart from achievement. They are supported and connected to a loving community. They can walk toward a good future, held by love.