Therapist: "How are you dealing with the procrastination?" Me: "Can we talk about it later?"

Sandwich guy’s lawyer: “In his defense, your honor, my client was hangry."

Dick Cheney’s death makes me nostalgic for when the GOP only sent our armed forces into other countries

Casey Means is the person you walk away from at a party. She’d be like, “functional medicine blah blah blah” and I’d pretend to get an important phone call

I’m considering getting on Substack just so I can leave it

Just finished "No More Tears" by Gardiner Harris. There are so many reasons to sue J&J into oblivion and yet the Tylenol lawsuit is about autism. Astonishing

White House East Wing lobby (Wikipedia)

The East Wing in 1992. (Wikimedia)

Movie Theater; (East Wing). From Historical American Buildings Survey. Photo by Jack Boucher, date unknown

East Wing; View of East Elevation - White House. From Historical American Buildings Survey. Photo by Jack Boucher, date unknown

I love the COVID vaccine so much I did it twice. I went to Walgreen’s and then walked across the street to CVS

Happy New Year! Here’s my short story about Rosh Hashanah during the Korean War, “Services.” shortstoryproject.com/stories/serv...

Are there any accounts here that actually have ideas? Seems like everyone is simply repeating the latest horror to increase engagement. Even the Lincoln Project is using Kimmel as fundraising excuse.

Where the frites have no name

The Administration has published a list of priorities for future arts funding, so I thought I’d get a jump on next year’s grant application www.gordonhaber.net/my-2027-nea-...

I reviewed the new FF movie! It’s good! (The movie I mean) bookandfilmglobe.com/comics/can-t...

I asked AI image generators to draw me. See the surprising results… www.gordonhaber.net/i-asked-ai-i...

Exclusive pic of RFK Jr.'s panel reviewing childhood vaccine schedule

Linda Yaccarino: I quit Grok: Jew

You know it would be great if even more people on the Internet tell me how I should be using AI, thnx

MAHA - Make AI Hallucinate Again www.cbsnews.com/news/rfk-jr-...

I wrote about S.N. Carvalho, the painter and photographer who documented Fremont’s 1853 expedition through the Rockies. Along the way he encountered an America teeming with wildlife, Native Americans, and Brigham Young, who apparently danced with a “light fantastic toe." forward.com/culture/7232...

Has anybody been covering the blatantly obvious security issues involved with accepting a Qatari plane as Air Force One?

Chuck Schumer looking more and more like the aging cousin at the seder asking if we’re ever gonna eat

The lack of a state religion in the US is actually what helped religious pluralism to flourish. But this never sat well with some Americans. For ARC, I interviewed the eminent Jerome Copulsky on the “American Heretics” fighting for a Christian constitution. arcmag.org/a-specifical...

Hazel likes to sit on magazines. What is she trying to tell me? #Caturday

It’s time to stop kvetching. If we want a return to responsible governance and the rule of law, we’ve got to find concrete ways to defeat Trump – or at least limit the damage. I dug up some ideas. Let me know what you think, and if you have ideas of your own. www.gordonhaber.net/7-ways-to-de...

If you want a brief respite from the chaos, may I suggest you read my new flash fiction, “Little Men,” published today on Scud, "lo-fi purveyor of degenerate art." scudlit.blogspot.com

Reminder: with the CDC eviscerated, I compiled a list of state & municipal health information websites. I included info on bird flu (H5N1) where possible. www.gordonhaber.net/health-infor... #CDC #birdflu #avianinfluenza

This place sucks. On Twitter you had racists & fascists. And you had those who built their platform by dunking on racists and fascists. Now the latter is here doing the same shit, so you still have to hear about the racists and fascists, and from the people who mistake social media for activism.

Reminder: With the CDC no longer functioning, I'm creating a list of health data sites by state and municipality. I'm adding to it as time allows. www.gordonhaber.net/health-infor... @jessicavalenti.bsky.social

There is always a grift. Gavin Kliger, one of the DOGE lackeys currently destroying the gov't, has a $1000/month Substack.

RAMONA AT MIDLIFE is available for pre-order. (Written, produced and directed by my wife, Brooke Berman!)

Does anyone have a 4-year klonopin

Stockpiling flouride

Meanwhile, on Tumblr…

I deleted my Twitter before it was cool

cagibilit.com/home-economi... My short story "Home Economics" out this month in Cagibi. Race, religion and high school in NYC in 1949.

My story "the Pikeman" set in New Amsterdam published by The Greyhound Journal, a great student-run journal. It's a deeply researched slow burn — a friend called it "Dutch colonial noir." My 4th story this year, not that I'm counting. Let me know what you think.