I love my autistic child and am a proud parent. You MAGA and MAHA orcs can come at me.

So if the Rapture doesn’t happen next week, they’ll shut the fuck up, right? … No? The fuck.

If you haven’t yet retroactively renamed your children after Charlie Kirk, you are obviously a member of Antifa, and you should be publicly executed.

Orwell was only off by 41 years.

Dr. Indiana Jones was fired from his faculty position for hating Nazis.

Does this mean Jesse Waters doesn’t want to kill me anymore? I was kinda looking forward to him trying.

These people have all been calling for our executions for years and yukking it up when Dems are gunned down. It never occurred to them that they could also be vulnerable to the same gun violence.

So burning the flag will get me a year in prison. What about when I take a piss on it?

Nice try, MAGA. We all know Sydney Sweeney is about 15 years too old for you.

Big, bearded, beer-drinking, football-watching dude here—and I seriously can’t fucking stand the manosphere. From the loudmouth Christian dipshits in my small-town middle school, to the performative frat bros in college, to insecure clowns in the workplace. Maybe it’s because I read.

Every single Republican now endorses raping children.

A lot of Kamala-is-worse-than-Trump libs all of a sudden. And their smugness makes these blue MAGAts worse than the red ones. I suspect many are Russian bots.

Dear Leader has a full head of natural hair that sets off his natural orange skin, and he never repeatedly raped children with Jeffrey Epstein.

Good morning, MAGAts. Rape any children yet today?

Everyone who stands by him or cowers before him might as well be a child rapist too.

MAGAts and the media want Obama to die in prison like Navalny just because their orange overlord rapes children.

Qanon was right. We *are* being ruled by an elite cabal of child rapists. And they love it.

Every single Trump apologist would thank him for raping their daughters. Never forget.

Let’s call them the Washington Epsteins.

A few years ago, I was admonished for suggesting that if Trump raped the daughters of his voters on Fifth Avenue he wouldn’t lose a single vote. You see, I was being far too indelicate for reasonable discourse.

You red state rural fucks better not overcrowd our blue city hospitals with your weak shit. We’re all gonna die, as your leaders say, so get to it.

Your move, establishment Dems. What’s that? Crickets?

RFKjrs new chair of the vaccine advisory panel.

All this because Elon reminded everyone that dear leader fucked children with Epstein.

I never want to hear self-righteous moralizing shit from christians again for the rest of my life.

Nothing will make you feel older than rewatching season 1 of The Wire and realizing how old you were when tiny Michael B. Jordan broke your fuckin heart.

Turns out, we’ve always been in a class war. And they’re crushing us.

If the Trump Administration now presumably has sole access to the government weather-controlling tech, why did Dear Leader target Missouri and Kentucky with tornadoes?

If Dante were alive today and composing The Inferno, his punishments for anyone working for TurboTax in the year of our lord 2025 would be gorgeously violent.

When do we get to see MAGA stock bros jump out of windows?

Feeling strong last days of Númenor vibes. When will Trump and Vance build that temple of Morgoth?

There is no war in Ba Sing Se.

Good game, America. As a poet once said, go fuck yourself.

To those of you who voted for him and are about to lose your savings, if you find yourselves contemplating suicide, just remember … get your whole head in front of the shotgun.

Schumer and the cowardly Democratic Senators might as well be Republicans. This is beyond demoralizing and why so many people embrace the Luigi method.

🚨 BREAKING: Another one of Elon Musk’s taxpayer-funded Starship rockets just exploded—AGAIN. How many billions are we wasting on this failure factory? Everything Musk touches blows up, catches fire, or crashes—including the Trump Administration.

My 11-year-old just said her favorite X-Men characters are “Storm, obviously,” and “Don’t think it’s weird, Dad, but Magneto.” Best possible answer that doesn’t include Gambit.

Fuck every worthless American piece of shit who voted for this or sat it out.

This explains why Republicans and evangelicals are pro-Putin. This is their jam! news.un.org/en/story/202...

He gets us (because we’re a bunch of racist, incel pieces of shit who can’t find the clitoris).

Here comes that small government I’ve heard about all these years.

The thing is, we’re a country of stupid fucking orcs, and most of us deserve what’s about to happen.

"Everything I say leaks," Zuckerberg says in leaked meeting audio. "It sucks" www.404media.co/zuckerberg-s...

Only a white dude could be up for a cabinet post who’s a 14 year heroin addict, has a brain worm, thinks WiFi makes your brain leak, thinks trace chemicals in water make frogs trans, looks like a skin cancer warning ad, and talks like Miles Davis got punched in the throat. TF are we doing?

It’s almost as if Republicans and Christians are super into rape. Watch red states and Christian judges start to legalize it.

Wasn’t Dear Rape Leader supposed to have stopped the war in Ukraine already? Praise him.

Cucks say what? Next time, learn how to use Google, coppers.

My daughter, who is 11, said “Mason Rudolph is the best quarterback the @pittsburghsteeler.bsky.social ever had.” #nfl #steelers