Yeah no Hera's balls are freaking awesome They're huge and soft and they smell absolutely incredible and oh I just read the rest of the post

"Average Elysian warrior has c-cups" statistic actually false. Average Elysian warrior flat as fuck. @desire.gunmetolymp.us , who breasts so boobily that they're technically weapons in and of themselves, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

Did you know that fish are either saltwater or freshwater, and if you put a saltwater fish into freshwater, the water starts absorbing into the fish and it gets grotesquely swollen and dies? Yeah that's why I keep a big salt barrel next to my bathtub

@dolphin.gunmetolymp.us Do you speak fish?

fuck I forgot to add "pussy" onto that big list I posted earlier, now everyone thinks i don't like eating pussy. please put it on hte news that i like eating pussy it's like my fourth or fifth favorite activity

list of things that make caeneus hungy 1. barbecue 2. coconut 3. eidolons 4. nymphs 5. caenis 6. just the right amount of acid on the fish 👌 7. athena's aegis 8. @butchwrangler.gunmetolymp.us 9. the hesperides (love u bitch) 10. the gods 11. apollo (big glowy thing not the deer) 12. adrastus

nymph vore

nobody's gonna believe me about this but once i let Lord Hera punch me in the stomach at full 100% force and I lived. sore for a week after but i have to imagine this is a similar level of accomplishment to what graduating from college must feel like

tch. i had cannibalistic urges *before* it was cool

landcels will never know the ultimate high that comes from rubbing coke directly into your gill slits

One of the nice things about being me is that sometimes when I'm dissociating hard enough I can touch my own boobs and it's like i'm touching boobs. like hehe boobs

@nevereverlookback.bsky.social OH SHIT SAME GENDER WHAT UP. We should like. Go and have an illegal street race or something idk what happens when two bros meet each other

Is there a band named "I'm not Trygon" or something, what's up with that

Being called someone's boyfriend: 😃 Being called someone's brother/son etc: 😃 Being referred to as a boytoy, fuckboy, etc: 😃 Using he/him pronouns to the exclusion of any others: 😃 Literally having a penis: 😃 Being a man: 🤢 Somebody make this shit make sense to me i just can't

which banner-class do y'all think is the tastiest. I think my money would have to be on Laphria

Imagine having a younger sister who's just, an absolute bitch who's agonizing to be around. Could never be me.

I don't know why you're acting like it's not simple, my hands are covered in metal, whenever I snap it generates sparks that are hot enough to light a cigarette. Please call me back please call me back please call me back please call me back