i guess this is today’s thesis huh

is it the air and water show or are they finally done dealing with sanctuary cities

can peacock release an edit of ‘wicked’ of just the scenes with bowen yang so i don’t have to sit through it again

is chili crisp a vegetable

united healthcare just denied my prescription for a smoking cessation aid 🙃🙃🙃

i have sangria on tap in my home for the foreseeable future, i am becoming a stronger and more powerful hostess 🍷

any chicago people interested in joining our thalia hall opera box for porridge radio tomorrow?? porridge radio is almost broken up and we have space, you should join!

i’ve realized i don’t have to up any dosages, it’s just normal seasonal affective disorder and i just need a plane ticket to somewhere with flowers 💐

my calendar just informed me that inauguration day is the same day as mlk jr. day and that really doesn’t feel like great planning

wait a second, have people still been over at twitter all this time

are people starting to use this for real? i’m too whelmed to see why i keep getting notifications

Tullycraft knows I’m Maud’s friend

tullycraft knows who i am

is charly bliss just robyn for taylor swift fans?

the olympic closing ceremony is fully a waking nightmare

if you don’t already think synchronized swimming is strange, jason mamoa narrated the usa team’s routine

paris: where people don absurd outfits to breakdance

sometimes i just put on red lipstick and stare at myself in the mirror

making a mix for a 3-year-old. considering putting some beat happening on it to give the kid enough time in their life to try to understand the beat happening

this is currently happening four doors down i believe

they’re setting off giant fireworks on /irving park road/ there are no longer laws it is the purge

entering every lollapalooza contest in hopes of getting free round trip airfare out of chicago during lolla weekend

i think i finally like john mulaney, which is annoying because his whole schtick is getting people to finally like him

i think i’ve only ever felt love and grief as the same emotion, and also in other totally unrelated news, i probably have to go back to talk therapy

some free tv streamer is playing the local news coverage of the los angeles pride parade and i’m so delighted

oh a lady’s just painting her nails on the subway car ok sure

ah crap, my mom told me a neighbor kid growing up has a restaurant in brooklyn. turns out she has a few and is a famous restaurateur type, and so the “finding out what chicago kids are up to in nyc” nightmare begins

dropped the dog off at her pied-à-terre for the week and now i’m walking from room to room expecting to see her looking disappointed at me for something

the girl my friend has fallen for turns out to be a bigot, and in all the mental gymnastics i’m trying to do, i can still only come up with “dying alone is fine actually”

i am terrifically gifted at eating ice cream cake

pretty sure my brain thinks “having a crush” is just “finding a new target to project upon reasons why i should be sobbing”

i hope i never have to throw a party again (my martha stewart complex will never let that happen)

2pm: Whole day is ahead of me, anything can be done 3pm: Day is basically over/ This precious gift has turned to dust in my hands.

picked out a banger of an outfit and immediately spilled iced coffee all over it (don’t worry i threw it in the washer and doors for the show im going to are in 70 minutes and 60 minutes away, EVERYTHING WILL BE FINE)

sound mastering challenge of the year: mixing out the boos during israeli presentations on the live eurovision contest

i’m so tired of basing my behavior on the comfort of men

missing the opening band because i think i was feeling woozy: being old is so cool

there are officially more people at the show than i was expecting to deal with so i immediately walked in, headed to the bathroom, and locked myself in a stall

i am an intensely self-aware person that simply did not notice that i’ve lost 20lbs since january

two old dudes in the doctor’s waiting room are discussing their breakfast recipes, much ham is involved, these men are undiscovered culinary gods

i will never stop being upset that my employer generally spells my name wrong after four years, can’t you just copy/paste from the email or slack you are addressing me with i just don’t get it

i still don’t have a ticket to belle and sebastian, which i think really says: i would rather fly halfway across the world and board a cruise ship rife with disease possibilities than go to salt shed

literally just texting random people to ask what i should wear tonight

oh boy it’s comic con weekend so i’m not the most obnoxiously dressed up person on the train home for once

just fell asleep in the dentist’s chair while my teeth were being scaled, i can truly sleep anywhere

one of my favorite parts of being a capable adult is definitely just being able to make delicious french-style hot chocolate pretty much whenever i want

it’s a weird night when you shoot straight up at 4am thinking suddenly that maybe you should’ve gotten married 16 years ago

i would absolutely watch an hour-long super cut of all of midge’s outfits on ‘the marvelous mrs. maisel’ 👒👗👠

really tough to know what’s appropriate for a playlist when i have historically found “needy” by ariana grande to be a fine way to communicate my feelings

reminder: all it takes is an address to get added to my address book