Yooooo shoutout to our beloved railway for screwing over only my train today. Appreciate you king x #PrideMonthIsOVER

Therapist taking this week off was divine intervention I swear

I’m so annoyed. I have a great meme but it’s on my Mac which is in surgery. @ Starmer why couldn’t you have held off 😠

Supreme Leader Rayner will save us

An uninspiring wet paper bag is said to have finally been removed from London landmark

Why must my neighbour smoke what can only be described as something smelling of dog shit that has been set on fire 😭

Still annoys me to this day that you can’t refund train tickets the same day as departure 😠

Shall be fan blasting my gooch for the next week

Sources tell me he’s stable. Please god.

Just curious, out of the films about: - getting thrown in to a blackhole, - a big astroid vs an oil rigger, - a posterboy getting killed repeatedly by aliens, - and the guy who gets abandoned on mars Which one these would convince you to join the Air Force?

Spider-Man 4 ticket booked we're so back

Dyslexia finally tripped me up in a diabolical way when, mid sentence, I got nonsense mixed up with noncery 😭

I will be continuing my very long tradition of only caring once England are in the semi finals. Larper AND Proud.

Madeon has an album out in 9 days so any ideas of self-termination are postponed

I think this is the first Ariana song I’ve actually fucked with

This user is accepting dating applications from those who reside on islands associated with Spain or Italy

I need to make friends in Brighton to go and do friends things in Brighton as I quite like partaking in friend activities in Brighton

I’m still under the delusion that if Kier goes suddenly some of the nonsense will stop

The Monster:

I think binging Tip Toe right before I go to a local pride event was probably the worst thing I could have done

Just finished watching Tip Toe 😟 Jesus Christ. That was dark.

Need someone to explain to me why there is seemingly a national shortage of THIS 😠

Very funny from /r/balatro

I can’t prove it but Ncuti Gatwa putting up an instagram story of him reading a book called ‘The Body Keeps The Score’ ages ago was very much an ever so subtle hint. Anyway, hope he’s feeling better.

not long left now you horrible old bastard.

WHY WOULD YOU HAVE HIM DO A FACE CAM REACTION OF HIM PLAYING A GAME THAT INVOLVES JERKING OFF THE CONTROLLER WITHOUT SHOWING HIS HANDS

Nintendo are presenting rn so I feel obligated to still wish misery on whoever designed and named joycons.

I know it’s my own undoing that I’m a little rat trapped in the maze of Apple’s economy, however, finding out the component that’s broken costs just $1 but it is SO buried in my Mac that it requires a full screen replacement that would cost $600 might just be enough to radicalise me…

*panics bisexually*

Are all the episodes of Tip Toe out yet?

I just KNEW I should have taken it to another dry cleaners

Been bed ridden with a migraine and eating plain pita bread all weekend #pridemonth

Good day my fellow skeeters

I don’t care if it’s cold but this wind can fuck off. Why am I being jump scared by a falling wheelie bin??

Forever thankful he single handedly salvaged being a throw-away monster of the week in Doctor Who 🙏

Icl Madonna’s Grindr collab is making me actively avoid even listening to it

I’ve logged out my main Twitter account and buried the app in my phone

I think it might be Vadar #dbd #killerreveal

I am in the red bit and would like to make it well known that I do NOT want to be in the red bit.

Lil bro should really get a haircut 😳 It makes his shadow looks suspiciously like Dart… HOLY SHIT

I need the media to hear my pleas. I do NOT give two fucks if a politician has gone for a jog. Stop telling me.

Would appear I have discovered every germ in existence going by how crap I feel right now

I had an absolute awful fever dream that RTD was trying to write to a definitive ending for Doctor Who which featured: a lost episode of Coronation Street with a Micheal Jackson cameo, an element of The Wizard Of Oz being the foundation of the universe and Ruby Sunday being the universe’s avatar…

This headline confused the shit out of me until I realised it was a Dutch website.

Last night I learned that gays roasting marshmallows on an open fire was a recipe for disaster. I was surrounded by balls of fire on sticks whilst I could barely get mine to brown 😭

Hello Bluesky I’m sorry I keep neglecting you 💔

HELLO! Here's when I'll be live: Mon 11th - 7pm - Mixtape www.youtube.com/watch?v=z-Pp... Tues 12th - 7pm - Dead By Daylight Weds 13th - 2pm - Directive 8020 www.youtube.com/watch?v=9CtX... Thurs 14th - 7pm - DBD / RE9 game mode www.youtube.com/watch?v=tYd5... ✨ twitch.tv/dannehdoes

If you wondered how much sleep I got last night I just got on a train and tried to put my seat belt on 🫠

Just got out of watching The Drama. It was very dramatic. Please follow for more insightful #content

Going to be putting myself through the hell of trying to get to IRI 1 Killer on the hit horror asymmetrical horror game dead by daylight for the first time over this Easter weekend... and YOU can make it as painful for me as possible :) see you at 12pm BST