I’m not sure who’s controlling the playlist at this Jersey Mike’s but in the time it took to eat my sandwich, I’ve heard “miss independent” by ne-yo and “miss independent” by Kelly clarkson (and not consecutively).

I do not know what possessed my octogenarian parents to suggest starting a six-player game of Phase 10 at 11pm

OK, I think I need to freestyle some more entries in the Paul Robalino Extended Universe #gamechanger #dropout

A never-ending vocal ruuuu-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-un

What an absolutely delightful experience it is to share a sports with people

“You bring great shame to your mathematical family when you start studying statistics.”

Today's World Cup scenarios. Link to all four days, plus a Wild Card cheat sheet - uefawomen.neocities.org/WC26%20scena...

There’s a garbage infographic I just saw on Facebook about “how the US could play England on July 4” and people are in the comments saying “not true, use ai to check it!” as if the original post was not obviously ai generated

If you see this, post a picture of you in glasses.

Dan Nigro is just so incredibly good at his job.

Demi giving answers to Anna doesn’t really seem like following the “play mean” instruction… #gamechanger

“I’m gonna sound like Pitbull. Dolly! Dolly!” Incredible #gamechanger

Aww, Paul Refereeno doesn’t get to give away a rule upon catching someone? #gamechanger

lol at Demi not giving one single fuck about what a prime number is #gamechanger

Just when you thought you'd seen it all

Post a meme made by you

a glitch led to a very concise thumbnail

I don't wanna be how you formulate opinions on astrology.

So we really are just rolling a whole bunch of dice every morning to determine what temperature it is? Looks like ones and twos today.

Today in “the most wrong answer I have ever seen on a test”: Problem - use a Taylor series to approximate sin(2x^3) at x=1.1 Answer: 0.444060 Plausible answers: something between -1 and 1 ‘cause it’s sin(something) Student: 8.522792 E88

Sundays are for sleeping in

My banking experience? I went and deposited some checks and withdrew some cash. Why the hell would that merit me filling out a "three-minute survey"? THAT'S LONGER THAN MY BANKING EXPERIENCE WAS.

I couldn’t drink enough to make this make sense / But I think I’m gonna give it a try #rhettmiller

Never say you’ll never leave / ‘Cause you never know ‘til you try

WEEEEEE (and I cannot stress this enough) WOOOOOOOO #sirens #pwhl

Having her on my brain’s like getting hit by a train #old97s

There is an argument there must be some heaven meant for hearts that are half true. - “Champaign Illinois”, #old97s

They’ve been doing this longer than you’ve been alive. Time to rock out to the Old 97’s! @officialold97s.bsky.social

Concert venue, in Hershey PA, and opening act Lizzie No @old97s.bsky.social

ok but no april fooling, we are literally less than 30 minutes away from launching people to THE MOON for the first time in more than half a century. Godspeed the crew of Artemis II.

Mission: Meet and interact with a new person. When asked your occupation, answer truthfully. Avoid a full-body eye-roll when they announce how much they dislike math. Mission failed. Twice.

I love how the Paralympic curlers don’t need to shout instructions to their teammates on how to sweep, because there’s no sweeping, but they’re still shouting instructions to their stones on how they far thy should go.

Either my sister or one of my referrals needs to submit on LL so I can share my utter anguish

Oh thank goodness. Got back inside from a futile attempt to unearth my car and saw the email that school is closed again tomorrow

I don’t know what it is that seems to automatically lend me an air of credibility and authority. I was wearing a black t-shirt, holding a tote bag filled with my groceries, and a lady asks “What aisle do you have the honey?”

What’s wrong with this picture?

Karaoke achievement unlocked: Old man walks over to me from across the bar to thank me for doing a song that he recognizes (and is happy that I didn't need to look at the lyrics).

I found it. The most boomer Facebook post of all time. Checking in at the doctor’s office to announce to all of your friends that you are getting your annual physical.

so this is the second straight super bowl where someone named drake is being utterly humiliated?

Here's another edition of "words that I tried were rejected by a British game show emulator": airbuds, airshow, bendies, biowave, depants, doorcams, fecal, gearman, hickies, molt, muralised, outgive, poller, reswum, sista, sledman, totaled, uniters, unpeels, unslain, webring

A stranger complimented my singing tonight. He followed up by asking where I was from, and when I said NJ, he didn’t believe me. “Singing country like that, you gotta be from the south” I had just sung Matchbox 20. #karaoke

Baby, where the hell is my lover? Getting down with another?

Let’s cover ten pro tips for working with the Cursor agent.

When I saw you for the last time, I sweat right through my shirt I’m no professional, heartbreak’s just a pastime That don’t mean it don’t hurt

Shortie! Jailbreak! Tie game! #sirens #pwhl

If you’re a goaltender, TEND THE GOAL! #sirens down 0-1 early #pwhl

Jacob Frey told ICE agents to get the fuck out of Minneapolis, a hugely popular viral moment, and the media has been browbeating him over it ever since. Trump flipped a guy off and told him fuck you and it’s barely acknowledged.

Why would you ever kiss me? I'm not even half as pretty

Another cool boardgame I had a chance to try over the holidays is Orbit. This one has a lot of replayability, I think, because while you're moving your spaceship around the board to visit planets, the planets are moving too. There is also a second side to the board with more elaborate orbits for […]