HEAR THAT? I’M AN UP AND COMING LEADER!

- What does a winner do when life gives him lemons?! - Uhh... make lemonade? - No, HE SQUEEZES THEM RIGHT BACK INTO LIFE'S EYES!

[ #deltarunerp / #mvrp / #rpsky ]

WHAT? NOOO. C’MONNNN. NOOO!

// yeah 😭 he’s fun to write but i’m not on him as frequently as my other accounts because i need to be in the right mindset for writing The Worst Person, Ever and. tbh i feel like suddenly making him nice doesn’t feel, fair?? to the people he’s mistreated? idk i dont think i’d feel very satisfied

// kicks a rock. i kind of feel like i fucked myself by making swapton so mean and nasty because at this point hes so horrible that i dont think there’s any way for him to come back from it in a way that would be narratively satisfying for me

YOU KNOW WHY DON’T ACT STUPID

ALL YOU NEED TO DO IS SURVIVE THE SEVEN DEATH TRAPS INSIDE THE HOUSE.

YOU CAN DO ALL THAT AND MORE WITH YOUR 𝒱𝐸𝑅𝒴 𝒪𝒲𝒩 𝒞𝒰𝒮𝒯𝒪𝑀 𝒯𝒜𝐿𝒦𝐼𝒩𝒢 𝒮𝒫𝒜𝑀𝒯𝒪𝒩 𝒫𝐿𝒰𝒮𝐻! VIBRATING ATTACHMENTS SOLD SEPARATELY.

( fond chuckle ) SHE ALWAYS USED TO SAY THIS.

WHAT? NO WAY! I’M AN HONEST MAN! WIN FAIRLY, AND THE $500 IS REALLY YOURS!

THEY WILL BE MAKING A MARKETABLE PLUSH OF ME SOON

BUT THINK ABOUT HOW HAPPY THEY’D BE IF YOU WON $500 TO SPEND ON EM!

// i was trying to reference that thing mr beast did but i guess his prize was $500,000. which makes more sense actually getting only $500 after surviving death traps in a burning building would be kind of fucked

I WILL BE PUTTING ONE LUCKY VIEWER IN A BURNING HOUSE FOR A CHANCE TO WIN $500

( … what the hell are you doing? get back to work! )

AWWW. AWWWWWW. ❤️ AWWWW

( he doesn’t NEED to process anything else. just stand there and think about how it looks nice. why would you ever want the weather to be anything else? )

WOOMP WOMPPP. WAS THAT SUPPOSED TO HURT MY FEELINGS?

( the ceiling of the studio is painted like a beautiful blue sky with clouds! unchanging. )

IT’S ACTUALLY CRAZY YOU SAY THIS BECAUSE I LITERALLY AM FULLY STAFFED LIKE WITH NO JOB OPENINGS EVEN.

THERE’S A LITTLE VIROVIROKUN IN HERE!

THERE’S A LITTLE VIROVIROKUN IN HERE!

LISTEN. I TRY TO BE A GOOD PERSON, BUT IF YOUR BABY IS UGLY, I 𝓦𝓘𝓛𝓛 VAPE ON IT A LITTLE BIT.

IF YOU PEOPLE THINK YOU KNOW SO MUCH ABOUT MARRIAGE THEN WHERE’S YOUR SPOUSE. YEAH THAT’S WHAT I THOUGHT.

(i'm subscribed to a labeler that assigns deaths to accounts and i just thought his was Fucking Funny ok) @nowsyourchance.bsky.social

LISTEN. I TRY TO BE A GOOD PERSON, BUT IF YOUR BABY IS UGLY, I 𝓦𝓘𝓛𝓛 VAPE ON IT A LITTLE BIT.

IS THAT HOW YOU REALLY FEEL? WHAT A JOKE.

OOC : // "OUT HERE LIVING MY BEST LIFE" "Tenna is drowning" "THIS AIN'T ABOUT HER"

✧ @nowsyourchance.bsky.social

THIS WOULD LOOK SO GOOD IF WE JUST BULLDOZED IT AND PUT A PARKING LOT HERE

“HEWWO?” 🥺 I FEEL A TUG ON MY PANT LEG AT THE CLUB AND LOOK DOWN TO SEE MY OLD BUSINESS PARTNER, A TV A MERE HALF A FOOT TALL DRINKING A TINENKEN, A BEER MADE FOR MINI TVS. “HAVE U HEARD OF BRUCE SPRINKY? HE’S LIKE SPRINGSTEEN BUT FOR LIL GALS LIKE ME!” I PALM STRIKE HER NOSE INTO HER BRAIN

YOU’RE SO DIFFERENT NOW. WHY WOULD I? IT WAS STUPID TO THINK THINGS COULD BE DIFFERENT THIS TIME AROUND. YOU WERE ALWAYS GOING TO LEAVE.

I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHO I’M LOOKING AT ANYMORE.

WHO GAF

THAT FUCKING RED HEART SHAPED THING THAT KEEPS MAKING MOVES ON MY WOMAN.

CAN WE GET THAT FUCKING BUG OUT OF HERE???

YOU DON’T HAVE THE BODY TO PULL IT OFF. 🙄

GET OUTTTTT GET THE FUCK OUT NOW!!!!

YES IT DOES. YES IT FUCKING DOES.

EWW EWW EEWW. PUT SOME REAL CLOTHES ON!!!

SORRY, FELLAS, SHE’S MARRIED.

IF THAT WERE TRUE, YOU WOULDN’T HAVE LET THAT FUCKING LEECH KILL YOU.

( awww… she’s kind of cute .. ) WHAT THE %#$* IS THAT!!!!!!!!

EEEWWW. CLEAN THAT UP!!!

AND? WHAT ELSE?

EW EW EW EW EW. EW. JESUS CHRIST. WHAT EVEN IS THAT?

[ Shitty compressed JPEG of a corner in TV World's dark depressing basement with a small dingy busted mattress with a half eaten TVSlop on top of it and a bag of pirated DVDs next to it ] S-S-S-5-SPAMTON HHHATES J-J-JUST HOW L-L-LITTLE IT T4KES F-F-FOR ME TO BE H-H-HAPPY