They should bring back celebrity telethons. For example, it hurts my heart to know that some of you suffer from the genetic mutation that causes you to think cilantro tastes like soap. What joy in life can there be for these people???

I think a cool law would be if a public a figure files frivolous lawsuits they should be required to pay the defendant the amount in their filings. www.nbcnews.com/world/united...

Random person online: Who hurt you? Me: Do you want an alphabetical or chronological list?

I was thinking about how people think it's enough to tax the rich. I mean, yeah, it's a start. But when the the liberal side was much further left, and the US did those things, both parties still managed to invade every country they could during the Cold War in the name of the Domino effect. 1/2

Honestly, I think the better side won in this exchange:

I just ordered a drum kit for my nephew's son for Christmas. Sometimes, revenge is fucking awesome! Plus, if he becomes a millionaire hall of fame drummer, he will mention me in the rolling stone interview. Right?

I woke up listening to a group of women singing a singing a song to the tune of that Russian song from Tetris. I was actually enjoying it. Im jot usually into new pop but I get the appeal. I turned around up to see that the band was an all women’s KPop group calling themselves Aespa.

My dog is a natural enemy to a properly made bed.

I do not think I have the words to adequately articulate how disgusting she is.

I love people who are skilled and creative with their hands.

Clothing sizes I wore in high school are are a bit baggy on me. What a difference 38 years and having a teensy eating disorder makes.

Today I finally bought enough to get a free turkey at the supermarket chain down the road from me. I had the option of donating it to the local food bank. I decided to donate it. So basically, like the first thanksgiving, I am more than likely feeding settlers.

In the span of about 27 years, the GOP has gone from holding an impeachment trial for a POTUS who got a blowjob from an intern to completely ignoring a POTUS who raped children.

Mark this date in perpetuity. For on this day, I am making a vow that I will no longer be one of those people who pretend that gouda has anything resembling a flavor. Honestly, if I am going to put dairy into a body that seems to not want dairy, it shall be for a cheese that matters. That is all.

Is Trump laying the groundwork to try to excuse all the times he raped children on a "rough past?"

I see they rehired the person who ran the white house pharmacy in the first Trump administration.

Me explaining to my boss why I missed our meeting, saga I need to go get a new pair of pants because the ones I’m wearing have a broken zipper all of a sudden and I suppose it’s probably not a good idea to walk around the office without zipped up pants. Boss: *clicks laugh on text message* 1/3

Well, today is my weekly therapy session. And I definitely have stuff to share.

I don't know how the dog got "let's go outside" from me petting him and saying "you're a handsome boy" but he is standing near the door staring at me like I made a promise of some sort.

Most older generations will tell you about how they walked several miles a day to attend school... back before they destroyed the concept of a walkable city.

Thank goodness it is in the distant past when people didn't know better. Just like racism and polio.

So. We are going on a little trip together this weekend. It has been more than two years since I have shared a bed (etc) with someone. Basically, I am in my late 50s and I am as nervous as a 15 year old in the back seat of a car. 😆

This is more than just a little bit "bad ass." This is all the way over, completely, in the "bad ass" territory.

Sad, but true. www.youtube.com/watch?v=41NO...

Anything resembling a healthcare policy in the USA, as horribly inadequate as it was to begin with, was killed over the weekend by eight Democratic US Senators.

If sliced bread is only about a hundred years old, what did they do before that? Bludgeon it with a blunt mace?

I sometimes feel sorry for my primary with this whole MyChart technology. I am always asking him if a specific therapy is a scam or of value. But I have to give him credit. He does research it for me.

I want junk food today. Thankfully I have none.

There are certain business partners who are the living embodiment of why I hate giving my number to automotive dealerships.

I do not keep chocolate in my house and I regularly regret it.

“.. in a group Signal chat, .. he wrote in part: ‘I fired 5 rounds and she had 7 holes. Put that in your book boys.’” @reuters.com #Chicago www.reuters.com/world/us/bor...

Christ. I lost the remote again. What’s my problem?

I so love The Dropkick Murphys.

Middle of the night. I fell asleep with the remote on my chest. I can’t find it. 🫤

At this point, I can only guess that the person behind the scenes pulling Satan's strings is Dick Cheney.

All the attempts to create an executive branch with absolute power? The roadmap was written by Cheney.

Is it literal or metaphorical to say that there is one less Dick in the world today? I guess both...

So. This past weekend I introduced her to my dog. I know. I know. It’s probably too early to be having her meet the children, but…

No. His Christian faith is more about other people not jacking off than anything.

Now I am thinking about this entire planet being a simulation and not real. Either the programmers are major dicks or QA team really phoned it in on this one. I wish to file some Jira tickets now.

I just voted. One thing Facebook is good for is weeding out school board candidates. Creepy theocratic nut-bar fascists can’t seem to control themselves on there.

I remember - as a kid - there was always that one house who gave out toothbrushes on Halloween.

Im going to admit that I am not sure what I would do without my Ring camera. It’s better than caller ID for weeding out conversations I don’t want to have.

The inbred institution that unleashed a global colonialism that resulted in mass genocides on every continent actually has a higher capacity for shame than the GOP.

Buying from Bookshop.org actually puts money into the pockets of local indie bookstores.

Amazon is helping fund a $300 million build of a ballroom for the White House. Independent bookstores are donating to food banks and organizations that help with food insecurity. They are not the same.

I just tried an instant Ramen I bought at Whole Foods, called IMMI. It is higher protein, lower carbs. The noodles are a bit weird and chewy - almost like they made it out seitan. Overall, it not bad. If you want that specific ramen noodle texture, it may not satisfy you.

Meanwhile, he doesn't even live in NYC.

I knew it! I fucking knew it!!! www.macworld.com/article/2952...