Carol Lombardini
@itsmecarolamptp.bsky.social
📤 689
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lead negotiator for the AMPTP. parody of a person.
[email protected]
please join us in recognizing Bob Iger as a leader in our industry bravely willing to take a principled stand against comedians who say things the guy who approves media mergers doesn't like. we're proud to be in your corner!
about 1 month ago
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THIS SUNDAY come relive all the fun of hot labor summer with me and this great crew of actors who will be doing a live read of my SUCCESSION spec that many people in the industry are calling “very mean to CEOs” and “an entire 60-page script written as a bit” and “an unbelievable waste of time”
add a skeleton here at some point
about 1 year ago
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reposted by
Carol Lombardini
Joe Henderson
over 1 year ago
How do you best utilize all the goodwill you created with a bitingly well-written fake account? Go even further meta and further show off some great writing skills. Well done, Fake Carol.
add a skeleton here at some point
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reposted by
Carol Lombardini
Annika (Nik) Lee 李俏玲
over 1 year ago
this is so fucking funny, thank you carol
add a skeleton here at some point
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was bored before IATSE talks started, so for funsies I wrote myself into my favorite show SUCCESSION in a very special episode about what would’ve happened if I’d teamed up with Roy kids to crush labor last summer. hope you enjoy it. billionaires forever!
drive.google.com/file/d/1oECN...
over 1 year ago
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reposted by
Carol Lombardini
Kim Shumway
almost 2 years ago
Fake Carol (
@itsmecarolamptp.bsky.social
) writing us a love letter in THR this morning!
loading . . .
A Cruel But Necessary Post-Strike Farewell From “Fake Carol” to Hollywood
The pseudonymous mid-level comedy writer behind the viral social media parody account of the AMPTP negotiator pens a goodbye to the industry’s dual strikes, and asks moguls: "What was all the suffer...
https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/news/general-news/fake-carol-writer-hollywood-strikes-1235648026/
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sorry but if one more person comes trick or treating at my house dressed as scary hollywood actor Ron Perlman I will be calling the police I can tell you that much
almost 2 years ago
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wishing everyone a safe halloween but there are a lot crazies out there so parents please be sure to check your kids’ candy for SITCOM NANNIES ENCOURAGING ACTORS TO WITHHOLD THEIR LABOR FOR FAIR PAY
almost 2 years ago
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please remember actors are LIARS they get paid to do pretend make-em-ups and you can’t believe anything they say so don’t trust any report on negotiations unless it comes directly from the AMPTP or @mollylevinson or company-friendly trades or a big 3 agent who just clearly hates unions
almost 2 years ago
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ok which one of you assholes did this
about 2 years ago
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well we laughed, we cried, we fucked around, we found out, we murdered some trees and we wished a little light homelessness on certain people, but overall i think we can all agree i personally did a great job! now if you’ll excuse us we need to go atone!!!!!!
about 2 years ago
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sorry we probably could have gotten a deal done today but the time just got eaten up by calling every single agent and manager to tell them a deal was getting done today
about 2 years ago
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okay, cards on the table. closing a deal by today isn’t about the saving our fall schedule, or not blowing next year’s entire theatrical slate, or fear of the writers’ unshakable solidarity. Zaslav’s headed to Ibiza tonight for Yom Kippur and he desperately needs a vibe cleanse
about 2 years ago
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i love having the studio CEOs in the Sherman Oaks Galleria! even though they insist on leaving for lunch, it’s such a pleasure to watch them work, marvel at the way they hate writers, and wonder how much they think about the roman empire (back when workers were just slaves)
about 2 years ago
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shout out to Rupert Murdoch! a titan of our industry who showed it’s not just about underpaying workers to build a billion dollar empire, it’s also about making the world an infinitely worse place in the process. enjoy retirement, king 🫡
about 2 years ago
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a rare joint statement after today’s negotiations. feels like we’re finally finding common ground.
about 2 years ago
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FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE in the interest of transparency, here is the AMPTP’s agenda for today’s negotiations with the WGA
about 2 years ago
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the writers may have bullied drew barrymore & bill maher into doing the right thing but that shit won’t work on me. i’ll never do the right thing! they’ll have to drag me out of the galleria clutching my 30 year-old union-busting playbook and telling Deadline the WGA is ISIS!
about 2 years ago
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I stand in solidarity with the CEOs of Ford, GM and Stellanits in their historic effort to protect profits from the greedy factory workers who make their products. The story of capital crushing labor is the American story, and we at the AMPTP support you completely. ✊🏻
about 2 years ago
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there are a lot of rumors and false reports floating around out there about our next meeting with the WGA. below is my one and only official statement on the matter.
about 2 years ago
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ugh I hate how every TV character has to be good at their jobs. can we not have ONE comically inept labor negotiator whose only skills are an encyclopedic knowledge of mall amenities and the willingness to destroy the livelihoods of an entire industry? representation matters!
about 2 years ago
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sometimes I fantasize about walking away from it all and starting over in a small town. I could just be some lady in Sedona who sells local mesquite honey and constantly talks about how much she hates labor unions
about 2 years ago
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everyone trying to game theory what the AMPTP’s doing but the truth is we just don’t care if we ruin TV & movies because we kinda hate them? you sit there for like an hour forced to look inward and feel feelings. ick. if we wanted to feel something we’d hunt poor people for sport
about 2 years ago
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seems like y’all forget the AMPTP isn’t just a consortium of greedy CEOs, we’re PEOPLE. people like: Ted Sarandos David Zazlav Donna Langley Bob Iger Bob Bakish Beelzebob Jen Salke Zack & Jamie at Apple Sony Tony Ghislane Maxwell The L.I. Serial Killer Gozer & many more! 💞
about 2 years ago
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you reached the end!!
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