Me after Taco Bell.

Taylor Swift has a song about Travis Kelce's wiener? Big deal Blink 182 has all the small things about mine and that songs been around forever.

Since the government is shut down that means I don't have to have any taxes come out of paychecks right? Asking for me who has his bonus hit next week

"I can make deals with the devil because my dicks bigger?" Taylor Swift I wasn't familiar with your game!

Your 2025-26 Teddy Moosevelt's. Giving the L to Kopitar for one last run! He's lead the Moosevelt's to 3 championship runs so decide to keep him and enjoy this last ride together and giving the D for dawgs to the dawgs that will help him! (Kochetkov and Brady Tkachuk)

Happy Gilmore caddy is performing the Super Bowl? That's wild good for him!

This weekend is the last weekend of the movie theater that 20 bucks could get you a 2 tickets, large popcorn, and 2 large drinks and it's a sad weekend here.

Can't decide which comment is my favorite the one calling me a pussy or the one who doesn't know I called Staal Cap because he's literally the Captain. Either way it's always the accounts hiding their face talking the most shit. Can't argue with idiots baby!

Got Jordan Martinook to announce the draft order of the Marty Animals fantasy league. Once again looking like I'm going to win best commish of the year over Gary.

This guy turned 5 today! This hurts my heart

I was recognized by my Cowboy XL tattoo today at the ripleys aquarium down here in myrtle beach. I'm kind of a big deal

Deals done. Welcome to the Ostriches Sam LaPorta! Don't let me down bitch.

Update we actually have a deal in place but now it's radio silence. Damn youths

Been a busy day. I've been working on a trade that'll send the Fighting ostriches Sam LaPorta since lunchtime with my nephew. Dynasty trading is so fun because you gotta think long term! That is all have a good night you mother fathers!

I need help! I gotta start 2 Debo Samuel, Terry McLaurin, and Jaylen Warren?

I send @chelles116.bsky.social one instagram reel of silver springs by Fleetwood Mac and every other reel is now that song! If it wasn't such a banger and she wasn't such a badass (Stevie nicks not Chelly) I would be upset.

Picking Lincoln up from preschool with my way by Limp Bizkit blasting so these hot moms know who the cool dad is

In the past 2 weeks Lo started 4th grade and we went to see our last Mudcats game, Lincoln started his last year of preschool yesterday and today Lenny started preschool! Been a pretty busy couple weeks thank God I have a job where I work once a week.

I got a Hawlucha today and let me tell you something I've peaked.

After being an HOA President or as I like to call myself the HOA constrictor for 5 year I've sent out my first letter to the neighborhood. It was just to see if anybody wanted to do a neighborhood fantasy football league. I hope I scared the shit out of them

You can still poke on Facebook and I'm going to poke everyone

Happy 11th birthday to this old girl who takes so many pills I had to buy a pill organizer for. Live it up Millie!

I've been watching hunting wives and once you get past all the porn let me tell you Salazar is by far my favorite character. She's a badass!

Waving the confederate flag is bonkers but waving one while wearing a Cody Rhodes hat is extra bonkers!

That's my boy!

I FaceTime with Xavier Legette today and my life keeps getting wilder.

I had a 6 hour work week this week. Why doesn't everyone do this?

Ahoy there!

The most Moose thing might be happening in a couple weeks stay tuned!

Long story short I'm getting an Xavier Legette tattoo.

I went to work with 3 cats came home with 1more. Damn kitten randomly showing up at the farm and being bullied by our farm cat!

My buddy sent me this on snap and you're going to sit here and tell me this logo came up in the meeting and nobody said anything? Haha

In what's going on with Moose I've come out of a 20 some year retirement to leag a bunch of youths to becoming Babkyard baseball league champs then super entire nation champions, then the holy grail the ultra grand champions of the universe! I'm blessed to be back coaching in the BBL.

Locked Stank up for 8 years Traded for and locked Miller up for 8 years Signed Ehlers to a 6 year deal Chef Tulsky ladies and gentlemen!

You're welcome Caniacs.

Nipples get ready to be sore I'm twisting tf out of you! Ehlers is a Cane!

K'Andre miller?! Buddy somebody send me some nipple cream these bad boys are going to be raw by the end of the day the way Tulsky is cooking.

Like it or not a shade below "obese" Is peak male performance now a days.

Had a pretty sweet lunch date yesterday no worries I got him on the line Tulsky gets it done today.

If you're ever feeling like you don't have anybody in this world or if you're better off not being in this world just know you are and if you need somebody to talk to you can always message me or call. I Lost a good one and an absolute legend today. Just know you are loved!

Hand tat complete bitches! Look at that swelling!

TATTOO DAY BITCHES!

This hot chick asked for my number yesterday.

The boy done got his first catfish today!

A week later back at the vet with this old girl! Let's hope she keeps it under 500 unlike her brother.

Had a hole in my buildings door Lincoln had an action figure with missing legs now both problems are solved.

I was drunk scrolling instagram found my favorite yu-Gi-oh card in shirt form for 5 bucks so I bought it! If you see me wearing it I swear I'm cool.