I think of this scene almost every single time I put on socks and shoes. "I can hop around and stay dry!"

They already did that in Super Bowl 52.

Oysters Rockefeller means something different there.

They're literally just reading the remaining 11 tweets from Twitter that aren't by Nazis.

These NHL Network broadcasts absolutely suck. Hradek and Weekes is like someone said "what if we put together a crappy game analyst and an even crappier play by play guy?"

You know what doesn't work? Not naming and shaming the people who write this tripe. Does a journalist have to have sex with RFK Jr. in order to be called out?

I cancelled my subscription to the Washington Post.

The Washington Post and their oligarch owner tacitly endorses all of this.

The bundle may be big, but they're not in it for the money.

Every time I block someone from cutting me off in traffic, I say "oh no you don't, that trampoline is mine!"

Long lost clip from the Sopranos as Uncle Junior and Richie talk about Chuck Schumer.

Maggie would rather cavort with actual Nazis than actually stand for something.

Translation: "I got mine, screw the rest of you"

Hey everyone, gather around and listen to Hillary's shitty loser running mate!

Senate Democrats had a 28-3 lead.

Frankly, I wouldn't have even made a qualifying offer to get the draft pick if he left.

When you have a chance to retain a full blown Nazi and it only costs 13 figures, absolutely gotta do it.

Insider trading isn't what it used to be, I guess.

Let's just say there is a dropoff going from listening to Mamdani to listening to Newsom.

Imagine looking at the 2025 Orioles hitting performance and saying "we gotta hire the coaching staff responsible for this!"

Screwing children is a staple of the Republican platform, in every sense of those words.

Two more years of Tyler wearing a ski mask and carrying a gun on payday. Because of this schmuck, the Orioles will never sign a free agent to a multi-year deal ever again.

That's Shohei Ohtani-Durant to you.

Clayton was only there so that the trainer could use the HOV lane getting to the stadium. The truest passenger there ever was.

Leave it to a 2025 Orioles bullpen staple to screw this whole thing up.

Oh great, one more fucking game of the local Dodgers PBP slobbering over everything.

Pedophile lures children with candy, film at 11.

Everyone put on your best Macaulay Culkin Home Alone face.

Ah yes, those famous 100° days in Alaska which has happened <checks notes> one time ever, 110 years ago.

30 years ago today, Groundskeeper Willie died in a horrible fire at the elementary school and became a nightmare to the children of Springfield. “Treehouse of Horror VI” premiered October 29, 1995.

Idle thought: The 1986 Red Sox sure could have used the 1983 playoff version of Sammy Stewart out of the bullpen, 9.1 shutout innings.

If I could Being John Malkovich my way into Trump’s brain for an hour, I’d announce that shit sandwiches are America’s new national dish, just so we could all watch toadies like Ken Paxton loyally scarf down poop hoagies on the Fox and Friends couch. www.nytimes.com/2025/10/28/h...

The NY Times and WaPo may be lost causes but holy shite look at PEOPLE out here absolutely killing it with 100% unvarnished truths 🌟

Looking forward to the Ump Scorecard which will pretend like this wasn't -1 run for Toronto, because making calls in a timely fashion doesn't count in the metric.

I need to start making shit up about the 1990s.

The Democratic Party: "Fuck off if you were born after 1952"

twice-impeached president tears down significant portion of white house with zero oversight, good job america

Can't imagine why I'd cancel my subscription when WaPo covers important stuff like this.

Don't threaten me with a good time, CNN.

Goals in home games, 2025-26 Chris Kreider 2 (1 game) New York Rangers 0 (3 games)

Hey, it's the guy who denied the Ideal Gas Law 10 years ago!

The Oilers blowing all the savings on McDavid immediately on a 7 year deal for a #5 defenceman is so incredibly funny.

Here's the Yankee 8th inning pitcher today getting loose. Oh wait, as a felon is he even legal in Canada?

I'm sure that once Pritzker finishes his 3rd lunch of the day, he will get around to addressing this.

So glad ESPN did a documentary on the 2004 Red Sox, as that team has clearly not gotten enough coverage. Truly the most under-covered story in sports history. Hopefully they cover that one random Abe Alvarez start in July of that year. www.baseball-reference.com/boxes/BOS/BO...

And yet we will be stuck with 20 more years of Joe Davis and his Dodger slurping alongside John "I hate Baseball and Life itself" Smoltz.

Looking forward to Blumenthal saying he went to war over this when he didn't. That's his signature move.

Because the Democratic leadership is ancient, they already got theirs in life, and they don't give a crap what happens to the rest of us.

Wow, only .77 runs of favor for the Yankees in a must-win spot? Strike 3 to Stanton is called Ball 3 and then he ties the game right afterward? Frank Drebin wasn't even this obvious.

If there is one stat that sums up the cruddiness of the 2025 Orioles, it is this: in games decided by 5+ runs they were 14-35.