I would be frostbit if I did what he did.

It has a hat now..... A fucking hat... I just finished taking a shower. After I left the bathroom I went to grab a cup of water. Ozma was meowing wildly, I ran to see what she was meowing at and he was inside my house again. I grabbed Ozma, ran to my room and called Avery. I recall it wearing a Hat.

Sorry for the lack of updates. I've been rebuilding my relationship with Avery and doing therapy with Serena. Slowly but surely despite everything feeling like it's against me and Chernabogs presence, I've been doing better. I've been filming here and there, nothing that constitutes a vid though.

Changed my banner, it reminded me of Avis, I'd rather not think of her right now. I'm happy and I don't want that streak to stop. I've been given the opportunity to rest and enjoy life. I have no idea when I'm going to leave again, the CoTWE has yet to tell me anything about that timey wimey shit.

@redredhat.bsky.social thanks for getting me in touch with Serena. She's been absolutely lovely with getting me ready for future sessions. It's a nice change of pace to have a therapist who can actually listen to me and doesn't see me as unhinged. Lol

What I'm comfortable showing from my meeting with Avery. Truth is she's staying with me for a few days. youtu.be/rmLY9SMZw7k?...

I got a hold of Avery, I'm meeting her on Friday. I don't even know what to say or do or how to act. I just want to break down but I can't meet her and be a mess after all that's happened. Wish me luck.

Thank you to everyone I reached out to, it means a lot that you all think kindly of me.

I'm moving the Qna to sometime in the future. Write here or in the comments of my last video if there's anything you want to ask me.

I'm going to be answering any questions given to me. If you have one write it in the comments. If I see it as interesting and not stepping over boundaries I'd be happy to answer.

Well I got confirmation that the ward that I entered near my home on that lone tree was fixed. I was looking outside today and it's gone. I asked my dad where it went and he responded with "what tree", like it never existed at all. I called up T and he said that it's normal.

I caught up with Miles last night, we went to a sushi place and drank a whole bottle of sake. It was a fun night. I felt normal for once. We talked a bit about job prospects and such. I'm proud of my lil bro getting his life together. In return I told him I was working as a private courier.

I plan on eventually updating you folks again. Though Im going to reach out to some friends I haven't talked to in a long time, well at least on my end. I've been picking up the pieces of myself for a while. I don't think I'll ever feel whole but i do think I'm ready to share a lot of things. Soon.

I did something last Monday youtu.be/oOZp_e9q6WU?...

I had another encounter with Chernabog last night, he just watched me while I was sleeping. I woke up and we both stared at each other until I got interrupted by the remnants of my dinner. I have gotten used to how he looks but the way he makes me feel never changes. I need to set up master wards.

There are a few things I'm not ready to discuss, for now I'm gonna take a rest. youtu.be/uHTo2o7Rb3w?...

Alright, I don't know when my next update will be, but I'm leaving again. I got to fulfill the role I was given by the Coven. I knew I would have to do this at some point.

I got interviewed a few weeks back before I returned home, I learned a lot and realized a bit about myself but also this guy is an asshole. I don't recommend going on this podcast. youtu.be/m333MWef7qw?...

I just arrived back and unpacked my bags. My dad's out on the road, my mom's busy with her job and Miles is living with Bri. I don't think anyone knows I returned yet. It's different being alone after 5 months of living underground with about 50 people coming and going.

I get to go home soon, though I will only be back a week or two before I leave again. Mother and the Archivists said I'm ready to leave. I learned a lot of things here. I can somewhat confidently take precautions to protect myself against Chernabog, though I've been told he's still a threat to me.

I keep thinking about the reason I was majoring in English lit. I wanted to be a librarian... After I dropped out, I actually applied for an assistant job at the Haven Hills library. I was turned down because I couldn't drive between Haven Hills and its neighboring towns.

Last night I took part in a vote. It was a split on whether S should continue their duty as an arc. Her lively hood was placed in my hands. As I stared down an audience awaiting an answer. My response. I didn't have one. I told them to let me think about it. I've got a few days to decide....

Everybody seems busy today. I wonder what's going on. It's like everyone's eyes are on me. It's anxiety inducing.

I'm making faster progress than anyone thought. Grasping these abstract ideas. Everything involves more math and science than I ever thought I'd use on top of steeling some sort of resolve in my mind. This ability I have is something else.

I'm still frustrated, I can't even focus on meditation. This bothers me and oversteps my boundaries by miles. You're lucky T and M have calmed my senses. I can't believe somebody is as insensitive as you and can be considered a leader.

I'm not fucking around..... I don't want to see you for a good while. Not after last night S.. Your "pranks" are getting out of hand. How could you do that to me..... You said you were getting rid of dead weight. That's messed up, fucking up my personal life.

The only day where I want to be seen. No selfies sadly I haven't taken one since July.

This is a bit embarrassing but it's the first time i recorded music with other people. Sorry about the bad recording it was all done on a cellphone. I wasn't ever really a singer.

I forgot to mention a week ago I was given a test. I just learned of my results... I passed... I'm ready to begin learning to use my ability. Which is still confusing in so many ways, especially since I'm not sure where to start. In other news.....

There are things I've kept hidden from you all. Maybe I'll talk about it one day. For now I think I need to process it. I wish there was a therapist in here, one that would believe me when I talk about this stuff.

It's almost been a month since my last post. I've been busier than usual. These seminars I've been attending are boring. Sometimes there's something I find very interesting. Such as a safety guide that T and M put together for me. I think they are starting to like me, hopefully.

It's still surreal that I'm not at home anymore. I feel a bit out of place. Everyone seems happy and is smiling despite all odds and especially after what happened on the solstice.... I'm still a bit skeptical on whether these people can help. I mean they helped me once. I'm still holding out hope.

Classes are going well. I've yet to start learning to control these abilities. M tells me "before you fly, you have to learn how to run". Today's lesson was on the man in the suit. So much darkness and hate wrapped up into an entity. With no goals other than causing hurt to those most vulnerable.

Wake up... Back hurts because that damn mattress... Eat oatmeal... It tastes funny because it's made with water... Head to the atrium for the first day of lessons... All I hear is Aleister Crowley this, Nema Andahadna that..... I'm confused.

A Statement

I'll see you soon Ivy

Quis ego hoc facio pro ea aut ego. Non certus sum, si super caput venero. Longum tempus fuit ...... Res nota est, sed distans.

The Aspect Ratios are never the same. What is up with this girl's phone camera.

Volo eam optimum in eius itinere Truly

Last night was interesting to say the least, Mother gave me this bag. I checked it out and the contents are just a bunch of dry flowers and stuff. On top of all that I woke up to find something more worrying in my sleep log. I'm ready to leave. Mother told me to call upon her while holding the bag.

I've been keeping my eye out. My folks are working tonight so the house is going to be quiet. I wonder what the deal with the whole Solstice is. The seasons just change. Right? Does anyone know about the solstice?

I've filmed a good bit this month, so it's disappointing to know the footage I captured won't upload to YouTube. I'm trying to figure it out. I've really never been a camera person, ironic seeing what I'm doing in my life now.

I wasn't expecting much to happen this month but I got a week left before the solstice and a lot of things happened. I've been trying to figure out my future goals. I hung out with an old friend. I'll tell you about it soon enough.

19 more days, I've been combing over my last video. I think that mother told me to meet her in my backyard. Should I be expecting one more house guest this December.

Another holiday where my folks are working and my bros away...

Wow 25 people I never expected that. I know that some of you have been going through things like I have and others have. To that I just want to say good luck and if you need anything I'm here just holler.

I figured I should say I've been sleeping a lot more recently. I still constantly have the same nightmare, but this time around I understand. It's him trying to get in my head. I'm done letting that happen. I will sleep, I will dream and when I do I won't falter.