Whoever said “Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars!” is dangerously misinformed about the relative distances of the moon and stars

So… what’s goin’ on with the other 7.5 billion of y’uns

if i was just .1 flurrflügens more motivated, I would make a thing that automatically converted all .HEIC files to PNG as soon as they appeared on my computer. Because jeez.

This updated cost of my subscription is so much cleaner and more efficient than the previous version. I especially love how it went from "not quite $60" to "a bit more than $70". Thanks @1password.bsky.social !

20 years ago, brother @ethantufts.bsky.social won the Bitter Orange song fight. songfight.org/songpage.php...

a 1.6 tumble. maybe the DOW isn't how we should measure things any more.

calling bs on the Green row in Connections for 2/23/2026. Come on now.

Up from the grave he arose With a mighty blowing of his nose

Someday, when I go, I will take with me the proud history of being the last human to pronounce it as “press-tee-juss”.

How is there no official lip balm of the Winter Olympics.

Hey everybody, action A is how you succeed at stuff. If your brain can't handle action A, well then stop it. Also things should be the way I want them to be. Because they should be. Not because it suits my tastes and lifestyle better. It's a moral thing. Are you a moral person or what?

Republicans: How can we look more Republican-y without impacting our own constituents in any way? 51st.news/republican-b...

You can know that your chicken is cooked when the juices run clear when you slice the chicken but don’t slice the chicken too early because you will lose the juices therefore only check by slicing when you know your chicken has been overcooked.

production of The Muppet Show should not be dependent on petty vulgarities like “ratings” or “revenue.” it should be preserved as a vital function of american culture. it should have a taxpayer-funded budget rivaling the CIA

Never attribute to incompetence what can be explained by cruelty.

The Kennedy Center is, by congressional statute, the only memorial to John F Kennedy permitted in the city of Washington DC. You can read it in Public Law 88-260. It’s just a couple pages long. It’s not just a concert venue, it’s his memorial, like the Lincoln Memorial is for Abraham Lincoln.

When the lady at the front desk at the dmv asks “hi how you doin’”, she’s not being perfunctorily polite, she expects an answer. I don’t think she expects the truth, but she will ask you again until you get it, idiot, and say “I’m fine how are you”. Then you can get your number to wait in line.

Every ChatGPT response should start with “It says here…” and end with “…but that’s from some guy named NumbNutz69, so take it with a grain of salt”

StubHub tickets to Taskmaster Live have dropped precipitously from $600/ticket all the way down to $400/ticket!

Oh boy oh boy oh boy

i dunno man, if you want it so bad, give everybody in Greenland $1,000,000 and see what happens. take it out of the defense budget. hell, we spend $56B before breakfast.

Shiiiiiiiit. RIP Isiah Whitlock Jr. :(

Program that helps millions of people is too easy to scam. What to do? Obviously, cancel the program, duh. www.cnbc.com/2025/12/16/a...

Headline writer doing Nancy dirty here I bet...

Xmas movie update: the house has moved in from home alone, one of us finished Love Actually, and now we are in Mayja Weepa territory iykyk

It’s World Computer Literacy Day, when we salute the nation’s proud tradition of not knowing where the Settings icon lives. Celebrate by showing your Mom how to close 47 identical browser tabs.

"AI makes it easy to cheat on tests and papers" Solution: Eliminate grades.

Don’t forget to fire the bosses of the cops come next election.

Hot take: I don’t care if you use a lapel mic like a handheld mic. Much less stuff to carry and it’s phone-ready. Proximity effect makes it sound better and you need less gain than if it were clipped to your shirt. I do like it when you clip it to a pencil though, that looks more thoughtful.

One thing is certain Nothing is here to stay No matter how bad it's hurting Even the stars go away

Good riddance to bad rubbish.

Everybody and their mother has a podcast these days. And you know what? That’s freakin’ great. Growing up I never had a talk radio station that tried to speak to me, and now I do. Hundreds of them.

Dear @cnn - I know we give them human names, but please do not ascribe human motivations to weather events. How about “heading towards”? “May hit”? “Bermuda in their path”?

When I get purple last on Connections I feel like I’ve failed

The chorus of Swamp is really just David Byrne saying hi to his dog after being gone for five minutes

photoplethysmography

Apple is always focused on the convenience and efficiency of their interface for their users. Example: how they deal with blocked sources in their news app.

Happy Terms of Service Update Month

Enthusiastically pearl-clutching-yet-sarcastic regurgitation of topic summary understood at surface level without a moment of independent consideration

Devious, Wordle, devious. Wordle 1,523 5/6* ⬛🟩🟩⬛⬛ ⬛🟩🟩⬛⬛ ⬛🟩🟩⬛⬛ ⬛🟩🟩⬛⬛ 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

Dear @nymag.com Reddit is not a “corner” of the Internet nor is it the “last refuge of the human Internet”. It is the 6th most frequently visited website in the world according to SEMRush as of May 2025.

Shouldn’t it be Tony Hawk(tm)’s Pro Skater(tm) 40 by now?

retroactively dedicated to @johncarmack.bsky.social soundcloud.com/glenn-case/a...

Vibe Coder: "I have all these console errors" LLM: "Oh, let me turn those off for you"

The Molar System

Googled “Pennsylvania flag”

I mage a Chrome Extension that lets you get back to a tab with a click.

America under siege!

I was so tired last night that I thought my computer's bluetooth had died. I kept turning my mouse and keyboard Off and On again, but I was actually turning them On and Off again. I went to bed anticipating a painful day, so, I've got that going for me.