I want to play the sims in theory but not enough to actually sit down and boot it, so I’m just looking at Sears catalogue houses and playing soft jazz.

Moby-Dick is one of my favorite books but I somehow never questioned the name of the whale. And it turns out, we don’t *really* know why it’s “Moby”? Alright then, you keep your secrets, I guess.

A bunch of snow melted and fell off the roof onto the balcony in one sudden THUMP and I almost wish the cats were outside when it happened. Almost.

The gentle peace of this Homer Simpson novelty phone. Aspirational. Unbothered. Yet, ready for anything. Prepared, shoes on, arms steadied.

It’s snowing again so I guess that groundhog was correct.

Ever since my husband shaved his head (I LOVE IT I LOVE IT), I can’t accuse him about stray hairs everywhere. It’s all on me. I pulled a hair out of my dinner last night and realized I only have myself to blame. Oh my god the shower drain…that’s gonna be all my fault now.

Read. Unbelievable. While the first book never solidified into more than the sum of its parts, the second stuns. Its devastating interiority brought me to angry tears several times. The crushing claustrophobia of machismo paired with capricious female friendship? It’s genius.

Apple Music describing an album’s melancholic angst and nostalgia as “like Charlie Brown” but there are no trombone voices, smh.

Okay, when in lived in NJ these two cookies were my absolute favorite but since moving, I’ve never seen them again. At first I thought they must just be an American thing but since then, other Americans have asked me wtf they are. Were these highly regional?

If anyone tells you having a cat is easy, know that since Ivy’s tooth surgery, she isn’t allowed crunchy food for two weeks. She is refusing all wet food, vomiting bile, and eating COBWEBS.

I fell asleep last night comparing old editions of Who Killed Cock Robin. Of course, I forgot, and finding this in my camera roll did feel a bit ominous today.

Trying to think of new potential hobbies when I’ve got chronic severely low blood pressure and chest pains and can’t do shit like: crossword puzzles, jigsaw puzzles, word puzzles, feeling puzzled, getting lost in a giant labyrinth and fighting a Minotaur puzzle.

Scrimshaw would be a good eyeshadow name. Or a cat in Cats (Musical).

My dear friend made Nettle and Ivy as medieval marginalia cats out of clay and it is now one of my most cherished items. You know in a video game when you can’t trade or sell a key item? This is a beloved key item. ♥️

Reading the second Neapolitan quartet book: a) I keep wanting to type Neopets quartet b) the rich interiority is brilliant, such a complex window into both female friendship and machismo BUT c) these fuckass covers look like a 90s beach read, this is evil.

They are putting Picard into increasingly lower and lower V-necks just for me. They planned this, they saw the future and said: hold it, this will fix this woman’s depression, she needs this.

Don’t ever think I’m actually smart because I sprayed some coconut perfume and then thought: “man this smells so delicious. I wish there was a way to eat something that tastes like how this smells.”

Cat update: Ivy had her check up, and thankfully the vet smells didn’t make things worse. The non-recognition aggression isn’t totally over, they haven’t necessarily cuddled but they did sit between Vincent’s legs this morning. Insane that Nettle thought Ivy got body snatched.

Shrinking myself down to play on the Star Trek bridge playset. This is my holodeck.

I love Deanna Troi, I want to be best friends with her and get stoned, eat chocolate, and do some tarot or dream analysis with her saying “exactly, I sooo feel you!!” back and forth.

Since bringing Ivy home from surgery, Nettle has “non-recognition aggression”. Ivy doesn’t smell right and so her beloved sister hisses and avoids her. Vincent had to sleep on the couch with Ivy because she was crying alone. LORD! I hope it doesn’t last long, it’s heartbreaking!

Branding is so wild. We got people out there buying a 40 dollar pretzel franchise sweater and hat. I don’t underst—wait, hold on. No, I need the ‘naturally knotty’ sweater. I take it all back.

Miss Ivy cat had to have two teeth and a lump in her mouth removed today. I gotta give the beast a gentle kiss on her stinky nose. It will improve her eating, as she’s been refusing food lately. Get your shit together babes, you gotta live to be old and grey!

There are currently four (4) avocados in my apartment. Call me Mansa Musa.

I am resistent to all vacuous “health” product advertising but damn if I can’t admit Bludwine wouldn’t have worked on me.

Do you know how unashamedly I would wear some of these out of the house? That sweater to the right is unreal.

I don’t even have a valid drivers license in my country of residence but lemme tell you, I would straight up drink gasoline for a cute little Miata.

I’ve been Going Through It. Since my flu I’ve been on medical leave and am trying to reduce my hours - my mental and physical health are, bluntly, absolutely shit. But my husband made a snowcat on the balcony. And my real cat got her paws into it. Horrors be damned, I stay silly.

Read. An adult fairy tale - not in the “edgy reductive” way but in the “what if trouble was a fake concept and true love sweeps you away into a magical forest”. She’s just like me for real, daydreaming weird looking queen. Divine nature writing and a yearning that had me smitten.

I wanted to make a joke that Goodreads is so useless that I bet my childhood read along Disney books would have better ratings than some bangers but guess what.

One cat is curious about the snow and briefly padded out to the balcony to check it out. The other? Ehhh, what’s on TV?

Not nearly impressive as the thick frosting you all got in the States but this is the most snow I’ve seen since moving and you bet I threw snowballs until I couldn’t feel my fingertips.

My mom is at a park with several hundred manatees and I don’t say this lightly, but this would cure my depression.

I couldn’t tell if I liked this look better with the velvet capelet or not but life is too short to not show you both and because capelet is a fun word.

I wanted to know what kool-aid flavors exist, as one does, and why is google so useless now that it’s showing a random woman’s Facebook photo as the thumbnail for lime?

Raymond no, Raymond don’t look at those sites, don’t search for your name!

I got my Spock earrings for a dollar from a church sale, can we get a second miracle and let me find a Data pair for a euro now? Maybe one fifty adjusted for inflation.

sertralin winthrop is a beautiful name for a baby girl

It’s so funny that The Kids are into 2000s stuff because I saw someone ask if happy bunny was “underground”. I owned a notebook from Walmart with happy bunny, man. My conservative no-nonsense aunt had a t-shirt.

My cats’ food’s assertion that it’s “…really good cat food” has me questioning. Why ellipses, what are we leaving out here.

Read. Compulsively readable fun blend of detective story with elements gothic horror. Serialized in 1860, it goes ALL in on sensation and drama. I gasped. I read for hours. (I got annoyed at the repetition.) What a ride. Wilkie, I wasn’t aware of your game and witty characters.

I can’t tell if it would be cool as hell to have a cabinet tv like this or if it’s something we evolved past and need to leave in the dust.

Swapping my usual bone jewelry with fossil jewelry so that everyone knows I’m still thinking about dead things.

Ivy doesn’t appreciate her new toy, I’m sending her to the mines.

80s catalogue browsing and are we ready to bring back the plug-in bathtub jacuzzi extension? Did anyone electrocute themselves from this?

Our cat toy order came with a little pin with a Canadian maple leaf on it. I love it, can’t wait to wear my Canadian cat pin as an American in Germany. Let’s pile it up further, what more can I add.

Thinking about the time I used Frasier as my fake name at a bar but the guy I told it to didn’t even question it. Disappointing.

Reading history books introduces you to some excellent names. Hieronymus Wolf is so strong, so solid.

Every blanket in this home slowly becomes the cats’ blankets. You may think we have a lot of blankets, but no, they’re not ours, not truly.

So on my lunch break walk I saw a beautiful grey heron and a gigantic dildo in a plastic bag. The dichotomy of life thrills me.