GW3 🔒 🧢 🇪🇬👑 🗜️ 😈 Bruno ♻️1FT 🥶 🤕 Palmer ➡️ 🔵115🦌 Reindeer OR 🌎 2.7M Wildcard in either GW4, or somewhere between GW6-8 Best of luck all!

This is the Bus team - probably wildcarding in GW4 or GW7. If anyone has any clue what to do then let me know please.

www.football365.com/news/ranking... Crap website, hilarious article

Can't stand Helwani but oh my goodness do I hate Andrew Tate with a passion

💯

Onana gets his hand to the ball about 5 times and saves...1 penalty

"The system is fine" Mate if you're here for a pay cheque just say so...

GW2 Review: Free 💩 🍟 Disaster GWR🌍4.4M OR🌐🔻2.7M GWPts 🧮 53 TotPts 💻 114 🧢 🤖🔵115 💩 😈Yoro🅰️ 🍒Petrovic🚫Semenyo🅰️ 🔫Saliba🚫Saka ⚽Gyok⚽⚽ +12 points from FH vs normal team, which isn't greatl Also lost 11 points from Bruno's pen miss. Terrible stuff.

Vodka lemonade to quench the thirst and quell the pain. Handy 😄

So glad I free hit...and took João Pedro OUT 🤦🏽‍♂️

GW2 🔒 🍟 Free Hit 🧢 🤖 🔵💰115 Haaland 🗜️ 🔫 Saka OR 🌎 3.4M 3X ARS🔫Vs lee ◻️ 3X MCI 🔵💰 115 Vs tot 🐔 3X BOU🍒 Vs wol🐺 2X mun😈 Vs FUL⚪ Best of luck all!

GW1 Review: Spurs, Salah and a solid benchod boost GWR 🌍 3.4M OR🌐 3.4M GWPts 🧮 61 TotPts 💻 61 🧢 🇪🇬👑⚽ 🐔VdVen🚫 🐔 Kudus 🅰️🅰️ ⚪ Perri 🚫 🍟 Benchod Boost 12 points - more than I've ever scored! Plenty to think about but so happy the season started!

And terrible humans...apart from MMA fighters. Which is frustrating.

Guess who's back for Season 9? GW1 benchod boost 🍟 🔒 🧢 🇪🇬👑 OR 🌎: 1 LFG and good luck all!

4 X MUN 4 X LIV 3 X EVE 1 X MCI, WHU, CHE, FUL Bench boost played. All sorted. Now to to put the feet up until August and pretend Arsenal have a terrible defence and that Everton will start the season well...

FPL launches later today/this week. Until then here's 30 seconds of 40+ year old me trying to be fast and funny...and failing at both 😜 Have a great week everyone! 🦵🏽🥊💪🏽👊🏽

If you see this, quote a time travel movie that's not Back To The Future.

I remember him celebrating a last minute Bruno missed penalty in front of the crowd a few seasons back. Hopefully Forest beat Chelsea and Villa have to blame this 🤡 for their missed opportunity.

Congratulations to Spurs @planetfplpod.bsky.social @fplchancer.bsky.social

Turned off. Wife wants to watch You on Netflix. It's like Gossip Girl, but with murder. 5 seasons in. I'm invested.

Forgot how genuinely enjoyable Ally McCoist is on commentary. Really fun to listen to.

Son will score a second before United get an equaliser.

United hopeless. Spurs have this in the bag.

youtube.com/shorts/2qbbk... Weather 🌡️ getting warmer and I'm loving it.

Aged like Milk. Happy Monday!

youtube.com/shorts/R3ZKf... FPL team may be destroyed, but I think the Old Man can still move a bit.

youtube.com/shorts/JjWaS... Still pushing 👊🏽💪🏽🥊🦵🏽

And now Miles Lewis-Skelly is sent off. Arteta needs to teach his team to get better at dirty last man fouling - like Guardiola did for Busquets, Fernandinho & Rodri.

Double Arsenal Clean sheet busted and Bournemouth down to 10 meaning Django won't get a look in. Heck of a Saturday for my FPL team.

Seeing more and more face tattoos about. Don't want to seem judgemental but on immediate inspection they appear to correlate well with time spent in prison...

Quite fun watching the Spanish Taxpayers Xl absolutely handling the 115 Sportswashers. Happy Hump Day.

I'm going to call it now. By the time Arsenal go to Anfield in GW36 in May the gap will be 1 point. It's going to be a thriller. Genuinely excited.

Man Utd game was on. Mrs wanted to watch Love Island. Turned over to Love Island. Was better than watching the United game. What have we become?

youtube.com/shorts/UAO8J... First session this year. Hopefully plenty more to come. 🥊👊🏽🦵🏽💪🏽

So happy to be back at Muay Thai for the first time in months today. Am I too chunky? Yes Did I struggle? Yes Will I get better? HELL YES Back at it Friday. Have a wonderful hump day people!

Squat PB. There's definitely more in the tank. youtube.com/shorts/3AH6Q...

Thought I was a genius for hitting TC on Haaland in GW26 for 17 points. Then Mo goes and scores 16 in the 1st half of a DGW...

GW38. Old Trafford. Rashford scores the winner for Aston Villa. The media question why INEOS would allow him to be loaned to a rival. More incompetent management by the penny pinching vultures. At least this time it won't cost United a European place. 🤦🏽‍♂️

youtube.com/shorts/M8a6P... Deadlift PB. I know I have more in the tank.

Yet to find a sport with the unique combination of toxicity of both the athletes and the fanbase as MMA. Luke Thomas is a rare shining light in an absolute cesspit.

Spanish Taxpayers Xl vs Sportswashing 115 as the pick of the draw here. Atalanta, Dortmund, Bayern, Milan, Juve, PSG & Benfica my remaining picks #lukewarmtake

Fulham were trying to sell tickets to this game online - and I was tempted. But instead I'm sitting here cosy in my Jim Jams thinking it was a great decision to miss watching Man Utd on the River Thames at freezing on a Sunday night. Delightful.

Outstanding 😊

Turns out I could have waited until next week because Saliba was back. Hate you massively Arteta and I hope Liverpool win the league and Spurs beat you in the League Cup final.

Friends, I'm having some fun with a YouTube Channel this year. Mostly workout clips for now with the odd bit of commentary. I've had an Instagram page for years too. Will be on TikTok as well soon. You're welcome to come and say hi! Links are in the thread🧵 (and bio!) Big Love 💙

Interesting stat on the Kluivert family. Son Justin: More Goals at St James Park Dad Patrick: More European Cups, more La Liga trophies, more homicide and s*xua1 assault charges.

AMA. Chilling in the car waiting for kids to finish dance class. #ama

Armadillo Hat Trick. What a hero 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽😎

And now for a second! The boy is special! 😍