To those who clutch pearls when fingers come out at a restaurant: There is far more honor in getting every last delicious morsel off that bone or out of that shell than sticking to some arbitrary standard of etiquette and letting so much go to waste. Use your God-given utensils whenever necessary.

“You know that Tokyo was originally named Edo, right?” “Yes, but when did they change the name?” “………at the end of the Edo period.”

Another footnote: When celeb VO took over the big ad work decades ago, my agent astutely observed that it wasn't because of their skill or even name recognition. 99.9% of the time, listeners couldn't even tell. It was because if ad execs hired celebs, they got to be in the same room with celebs.

Footnote to the Matthew Lillard VO bit: I will never forget how — as an aspiring and *working* young voice actor in L.A. in the '90s — my agent suggested that I'd have a better chance of landing movie VO roles by making my name as an on-camera celeb than I would working my way up as a voice actor.

I’m not nearly so bullish on The Mandalorian movie as its boosters. But I really can’t help but feel like a lot of its detractors have kind of forgotten how to just have fun.

Okay, with the *possible* exception of my wife and kids, Matthew Lillard is now my favorite person on the planet. To hear a *celebrity* say this is just huge.

Holy shit, I wish Fab had adopted this.

Ever astounded by how many strangers treat me like a concierge service. Not the ones who apologize about imposing on my time, have clearly researched to a dead end and are seeking a hand. I mean the terse, presumptuous emails from people who come straight to me expecting a list of personalized recs.

I know. I KNOW. There are 72 billion more important things, but I just can't take it any longer. It's jus. JUST JUS. "Jus" means juice. "Au" is a PREPOSITION. Here, it means "with." Do you say to your server, "May I have a cup of with sauce?" No! You fucking don't! You just ask for sauce! (1/2)

Win.

Okay, look… they are not Milli and Vanilli. They are Rob and Fab, the Brothers of Soul, and I will smite anyone who comes at my beloved musical jesters with that kind of disrespect.

Incidentally, the fact that Rosenbaum is the same insufferable fuckwit who was caught publishing fake AI-generated references in his book brings to mind one of the childhood lessons my parents pounded into me: "You know who says everybody cheats? Cheaters."

As a working writer who sits in front of a computer, I'm going to say this as politely and constructively as I can. SPEAK FOR YOURSELF YOU INSUFFERABLE FUCKWIT.

Little on the nose there, innit, fellas?

NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! :-( www.timeout.com/tokyo/news/s...

We all enjoy different things and we all devote more time and money and energy to things we enjoy than we need to. Don’t fool yourself into thinking that whatever you like to do for fun is inherently more noble or virtuous than anybody else’s.

Oh man. I really didn’t want it to be José Andrés, but the law is the law.

“Huh… those looked kinda like dark trooper pods…”

Can confirm. These things are flipping great. I'm particularly fond of the hot dog. I ordered direct a couple of times, which is pricey and worth it. But I had no idea they had big bags in World Market. Sounds like it's a test program this weekend, so go buy some. For me. localstylechips.com

Honestly, all I want is for Siri to bat over .300 when I ask her to play a song in the car. Do we really need 53,000 datacenters for that?

Finally watching The Mandalorian, and even if I were inclined to ignore all of the extracurricular BS, Gina Carano's penchant for sounding like one of my second cousins bragging about getting wasted at little Joey's confirmation party every time she opens her mouth is reason enough to loathe her.

Anyone who looks at my stats and thinks to themselves, "Hmmm... I think I'll give him the maximum number of points for the food question," DESERVES to lose.

Sorry guys, it's time. Describing a dish/restaurant as a "love letter" to anything is now a crime punishable by death. I don't make the rules.

You know the feeling when you look at what you absolutely MUST get done this week and you count up the hours in the week and realize that it might be literally impossible? That, but through the end of 2026.

“Forget sharing the last picture you saved, I want to see the very first picture on your phone. Scroll back until your fingers bleed.” Both the first in my library and the oldest. The corpse of the mobster who was shot dead in the apartment I lived in from 2004-2007. No joke.

*opens social media* …………”Nope”………. *closes social media, goes back to cooking

We’re all trending toward zero, brother

Drove through a Sonic for lime slushes. Asked for “6 or 8 lime wedges on the side.” They gave us seven. Thinking about driving back through and demanding they either give us or take away one lime wedge.

Dumbass online restaurant reviews chapter 4,273: Uhhhh... steak frites?

A single shot from a foaming soap dispenser shall henceforth be known as one “bazoot.” It is so decided.

It is my considered opinion that people like different things. And so long as they are harming no-one, I see no purpose in ridiculing anybody for the ways they enjoy their free time, whether it be gallivanting around Disney, rabidly cheering a sports team, or indulging in fancypants restaurants.

“Speeders vs. Left Lane Campers”: An endless debate wherein every single argument is a tortured justification that boils down to “I want to be in front and fuck anybody who gets in the way of me doing anything I want.”

New home studio is *almost* enough to withstand both a lawnmower and a leaf blower simultaneously operating directly across the street. I consider that a win. BlueSky break while I wait them out.

Pro Tip: Calling something your “honest opinion” doesn’t make it sound more honest.

When people ask why I spend a lot less time writing about food on social media than I used to, I should just send them this as Exhibit A:

New home studio is READY FOR ACTION. Now I just need somebody to hire me :-D

This is how the scissors elite discourage first-time scissors ownership.

If only there were some way for voters to enforce this overwhelming preference without relying on legislation to do it for them. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

OMG guys, the answer is RIGHT THERE. This article argues that while MLB's recent adjustments haven't produced the bump in batting average the league intended, fans don't seem to mind. How could this possibly be, they wonder? Answer: It's staring you right in the face, guys! (1/4)

With respect to @jaysonst.bsky.social, a reminder that while the odds of a ball in play doing a *specific* crazy thing may be astronomically low, the odds of it doing *some* kind of crazy thing are much, much higher. Which is part of what makes baseball so much fun. Crazy things happen all the time.

Here in Phoenix, looooootta viral sensation restaurants suddenly going out of business this year, wondering what happened to the crowds and lines they had last year. Almost as though selling out for influencer attention isn't actually a recipe for success ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

GET. OUT.

No better way to end a tough day than a plumbing emergency right after the last hardware store in town has closed for the night.

Do it.

One of my all-time favorite recipes is for bison meatloaf. The intro extols the virtues of bison as a leaner, healthier alternative to beef. The first ingredient is a pound of pancetta. I make it all the time.

Hey, journo BlueSky... my friend Yael is not just a kick ass technology reporter who is looking for work. She is now a PULITZER PRIZE WINNING kick ass technology reporter who is looking for work. You should probably hire her.

Few things irritate me more than earnest, sentimental covers of sardonic songs.

Why choose?

I am not a filmmaker or I’d do it myself, but the holocaust film we need isn’t the one where people are exterminated by scary uniformed Nazis. It’s the one where the atrocities are committed by the perfectly nice, normal, everyday folks you can relate to, because in the end, *that’s* how it happens.

Name your top 15 TV shows ever, gut instincts only— Futurama Iron Chef (OG Japan only. I'd KILL for a complete set on disc.) ST:TNG (I *want* to say DS9, but gut says TNG) Breaking Bad The Americans The Wire Fleabag Deadwood BoJack Horseman Twin Peaks X-Files Simpsons South Park Fargo Fawlty Towers