Had to call my kid up from the basement to translate this post for me. Still don’t understand a goddamn word of it, despite kid spending precisely 7 minutes of their valuable microwave burrito time attempting to explain it. Just put me in a seniors home already I’m done.

I’d love to go to sleep but how the hell is Kid Rock 4 years younger than me, jumping around in jorts, looking like my grandpa yelling at the neighbours about the parking. 55? He must’ve found every secret stash of drugs Gen X ever forget where they buried & did all of them. ALL. OF. THEM.

Imagine being the most powerful man in the world and being this much of a whiney victim BITCH. Good god what a child

Well, I just saw a Best Western hotels commercial that had a schlocky, dentist’s office easy listening cover of The Band’s “The Weight” as a jingle and I think I’m pretty much done with this shitty timeline.

Some of the performers from the Bad Bunny halftime show kept the music going outside the stadium after the show and it turned into an impromptu street party.

L. M. A. O.

A Reddit user identifies the boy who took a Grammy from Bad Bunny in the halftime show as five-year-old model Lincoln Fox and says that he was meant to represent Bad Bunny as a child www.instagram.com/the_lincfox/... www.reddit.com/user/BabySea...

Seattle’s defense has been a fortress wall throughout this game. Outstanding work. What a battle of a game.

My family: “DID HE JUST SAY CANADA HE MENTIONED US!”

marry their first cousins.

Everything about our current timeline is exhausting and draining and I am so tired. I should really go to bend, but instead I’m going to sit in the recliner, stuffing my face with stale muffins, scrolling social media like the cure to all of the chaos will be posted by @chucklefuck4608587486.

I’m so torn over which Super Bowl half-time show to watch. Torn, I am. 😉

The thing about Helen Mirren is when you get to a specific stage of your life, it means something when you see a mature woman owning her icon status, proving that vibrancy doesn’t have an age limit. Ageing well isn’t about trying to be 21 again. We never can be. 🫶

Hillary Clinton to James Comer: “BRING IT!” (essentially).

Fell into the Toyota Tacoma rabbit hole tonight. The things you learn online.

There’s schadenfreude, and then there is whatever this succulent deliciousness is.

As he very well should. He should also go further and call out that she is inventing new grievances to get angry about, but this is a good start.

I’m not big into fast food, but I fuck with Wendy’s taco salad (hold the tortilla chips).

GOOD.

Our modern world has become a fear factory running at full capacity. Every time we unlock our phones, we're opening a Pandora's box of catastrophes, controversies, and crises — each one algorithmically curated to seize our attention by the throat.

Gotta say, the CBC News TikTok feed is 🔥. It popped up in my feed so I checked out the account and found myself scrolling for half an hour. Solid content. www.tiktok.com/@cbcnews?_r=...

What in the Tom Cruise Minority Report is this shit here now?

Absolute idiots online trying to suggest Epstein had a code name for Hunter Biden. My dudes, Hunter Biden loved him some crack, blow, sex with ADULT pros, and cashing in on daddy’s good name like any respectable nepo baby. He already told you all that, himself. That man hides nothing.

Well that about covers it.

Damn. I got duped. I shared the image on Facebook. This is rare lol It shows Trudeau in a black suit and Perry in a matching black dress. www.thecanadianpressnews.ca/national/fac... @kikkiplanet.bsky.social #Canada #cdnpoli

Gotta be honest here: the Sarah Ferguson shit hurts. She was supposed to be different in the good ways. A sassy, brassy, bold, redheaded commoner with curves and attitude. A refreshing Royal. Well fuck me if she didn’t turn out to be an embarrassment to all us gingers. Revoke her Gingerdom!

Well that happened.

Anybody want to go see “Melania” with me tonight? My blender is on the fritz, so I can’t put my penis in it as planned.

We had dinner at my fave cousin’s last night and she made the best butternut squash soup I’ve ever had in my life as the starter course and I’ve not been able to stop thinking about it since 😭😭😭

The United States of America has turned into a real life horror story. The details in the Epstein files that I’ve seen so far are beyond horrific. It’s a type and level of evil we rarely outside of serial killer files. Monstrous. How have they not at the very least removed him from office? HOW?

This is a stunning result, in a Republican stronghold district that is predominantly Christian-Nationalist. If the midterms happen unimpeded, the GOP is likely facing one of the worst showings in the history of the party. Republicans will get clobbered at the polls. They all deserve it.

It makes you sound crazy to say this out loud, but it's becoming increasingly clear that the United States government has been effectively toppled by a group of overt pedophiles

I had almost forgotten about the Jane Fonda-Ted Turner era. Anyway, THIS is who Fonda has always been, and why she’s a goddamn ICON.

Ruh roh, Shaggy.

Struggling with the fact that the entire world knows Donald J Trump is a monster who raped children, and then did every evil thing he could to keep that truth hidden and people died in the process and it’s still very unlikely that changes anything whatsoever.

❤️

That thing when you’re in a clinic and there are a dozen empty chairs and no other patients waiting and the guy who walks in decides to sit right next to you for some reason.

Good holy Connor McDavid WITAF is this maniac spewing now? China will stop Canada from playing hockey? Xi gonna melt all the ice and burn all the sticks or what, Donald? What are you even doing, USA? This man is an utter humiliation for your nation.

Carney couldn’t have upstaged Poilievre’s leadership review weekend any better had he planned it. The presser with the premiers, the Heated Rivalry photos of him in the fleece with Hudson, his comments about green lighting the series … That shit is all going viral. It’s everywhere. UPSTAGED.

Texts I send my husband.

Mr Kikki and I started watching season one of The Pitt and I know I’m waaaaay behind here but hot damn didn’t that Noah Wyle grow up GOOD? Oh my.

Tonight I watched Prime Minister Mark Carney take the actual Heated Rivalry Canada fleece from Hudson Williams, slip it on and say: “This is true soft power.”

Did not have Jason Kenney defending a LIBERAL Prime Minister while going full “yeah well your POTUS is a pedophile!” on my 2026 bingo card, and yet here we are. Surreal. #cdnpoli

If the Dems fold on this DHS/ICE funding, with the 2 recent murders in Minnesota, ICE still terrorizing the Twin Cities, Arizona, & now the Canada-Maine border, I cannot imagine anything but absolute outrage from Dem voters, in the aftermath. Deservedly so. “But the midterms” is not an excuse.

I have a question for my American Democrat pals: Are ya all gonna do something about Chuck Schumer eventually or nah? Cuz ooh lawdy. That man is not doing you any favours.

Just remembered I get to spend all day tomorrow in my jammies doing nothing so maybe I have a reason to live after all.

Trump’s Gestapo attempted to enter a foreign embassy to abduct people today. They didn’t have a warrant. Had they a warrant, it would be invalid because foreign embassies are immune from searches and law enforcement cannot enter without embassy approval. This is a big illegal. Again.

The pizza pop recall due to E. coli has been expanded to more products (Jan 26 update) Too much info to include in a post but see the link / screenshot for the current full list of recalled products. recalls-rappels.canada.ca/en/alert-rec... #Canada #Alberta #BC #Saskatchewan #Manitoba #Ontario

I’ve had too much contact with actual live human beings in the real world today and I’m gonna need a week to recover istg

You guys, Former Alberta Premier and longtime Harper cabinet member Jason Kenney absolutely ripped into some guy over on X for blaming the PM for the breakdown in the relationship with the USA and Zeus love a turtle I don’t even know what to do with myself right now 😭 #cdnpoli 1/2