Last night’s #Corrie, though.

Look out, #Emmerdale has been infected by a dose of the contemporary-Corries.

Simon Armitage being on House of Games has blown my mind. (Although Carol Ann Duffy would have been better. I assume they had to shelf her week for excess swearing.)

Catching up on last night's #Corrie, and part of me has to wonder if we are actually supposed to believe Gary killed Theo? I'm quite happy to believe that. I'm less than willing to care, though.

Catching up on last night’s #Emmerdale, and praying Curly Watts hasn’t crossed the Pennines with his bobby of a wife.

(Ideally without any humour, obviously)

More episodes entirely devoted to hallucinatory villains, red murder herrings, and insulin-based suicide attempts, please, #Corrie.

Weatherfield’s new DI has quite the look of Eva Braun - a (nother VW) line I fully expect a character to utter in the coming weeks. #Corrie

Poor Rob Mallard must have quite the headache after Daniel’s week of frenzied self-righteousness. No wonder the camera operatives keep having to climb up trees and hide in holes to film his flailing limbs. #Corrie

Rather than Fathers’ Day itself, something which constantly reminds me about the death of my father is the deluge of enquiries as to whether I’d like to opt out of being reminded about Fathers’ Day.

“An ox in popsocks.” #Corrie

I just received an email entitled Start June With Your Contact Lenses Sorted.

Finally. #Corrie

More drunken Daniel pls #Corrie

SOMEONE FETCH MISS CRAWSHAW #Corrie

Finally, the return to the feature-length #Corrie bin-based drama we’ve been craving.

youtu.be/wZdpNjJakiI?... Thirty-eight years since this absolute fucking icon was sat on by Nicholas Witchell, and sadly just as relevant this week as it was then.

Give it to Gaffney

Hello Marjorie! What sort of week have you been having?

I wish wicked Doctor Todd would do that super (Bristolian) Suffolk accent that she had in that silly programme where Martin Kemp played Beelzebub and had 666 as his numberplate just in case the viewers didn't realise. #Emmerdale

Glenda and Sean's synchronised moves behind the bar make a wonderful display of Antony Cotton's natural grace. #Corrie

ALLSLOP #Corrie #LindseyCorkhill

Kind of Sean to quote a Victoria Wood line so soon after Sally doing the same. Meta. #Corrie

Making a quick list of #Corrie characters less likely to read someone else's diary than George. Here it is:

LESBIAN DARTSWEAR #Emmerdale

But it's still too good for Vanessa, obviously.

I bet wicked Doctor Todd has whisked that pancake batter using the teats of her own udders. #Emmerdale

Did I miss Coronation Street's titles' tribute to one of the final three original cast-members? #Corrie

I just caught a rear-view of Dev leaning across the counter as Roy inspected his eggs, and genuinely thought Evelyn had popped back. #Corrie

Someone please tell me that cuddly Kev has just bought himself some new trainers, a pot of petrol, and fired up Google Maps. #Emmerdale

Oh, no: Alan Rothwell. #Corrie #ClassicCorrie #CoronationStreet #DavidBarlow

@cowboykimtate.bsky.social SADIE KING!

Bin-area drama in #Corrie.

PHROGGING STORYLINE #Corrie

Will’s GCSE English exam doesn’t seem to have phased him. #Corrie

DANIEL IN BOOZE HELL #Corrie

Vanessa’s that kid in your year who thought she could behave like an arse because her dad was head of history and her mum came in to help out on swimming days. #Emmerdale

It might be an idea to whip off both Cain’s testicles while he’s under, just to calm things down a bit. Like you would with a dog. #Emmerdale

Bring back the floppy fringe and give the lad a golf cue. #Corrie

Angry Daniel is my favourite Daniel. #Corrie

Schools are notoriously understanding about their year elevens taking off to Scotland just as their exams begin. #Corrie

I’ve been meaning to read Murder on the Orient Express but I think Todd may have just ruined the twist for me. #Corrie

Kim Tate + Wicked Doctor Todd sapphic love-hate entanglement when, please, #Emmerdale?

Excellent skirt-length on incumbent poet laureate Hope in tonight's #Corrie.

AIDAN CRITCHLEY!!! #Corrie

How long does a teacher have to work at Weathy High before they are allowed to call the head by her first name? #corrie #MissCrawshaw

Can anybody lend me a copy of this week’s Hiya! magazine? Asking for my friends* Jizz and Vyrone Clobbs, Fally Jetbarf, and Jarry Jinjazz. #Corrie *Names have been changed to preserve anonymity.

It’s about time that DS Swain’s series of arresting blouses got the attention they deserve. #Corrie