It's that time of year again! Time for my HOLIDAY MOVIE THREAD! For those that haven't seen me do this before, this is when I watch a holiday movie I've never seen before every day until Christmas and rate it based on no criteria other than my emotions. It's fun! Join me!

Catholics really went off with stained glass didn’t they?

Nothing like going to bed covered in glitter #pridevibes

When you go into the bathroom thinking you have to pee and then sit down and have diarrhea instead

What’s the sexiest song to exist and why is it Buttons by The Pussycat Dolls

“You’ve been invited to a group chat”

Me: I’m a fully grown adult! Also me: nice.

Eating a burger with peanut butter on it and all is right in the world

Who’s watching #Survivor48?

Dropped my phone on a gay bar bathroom floor should I throw it away y or n?

A rainbow-painted cop car is so dystopian, like ok Coriolanus Snow

Best advice you ever received from a song, I’ll go first. People of the world Spice up your life

I love it when guys I’ve actively attempted to date, asked on dates, etc post V Day posts like “another year of being single guess nobody wants me!” Like bitch you ARE wanted but you’re too self-absorbed to accept the love you deserve!

Why are professional athletes the only ones who get to retire in their 30s, I wanna retire in my 30s

Listen I TRULY believe that people contain multitudes but gay men screaming at the tv on the Super Bowl are unnatural beings

Does anyone remember that old YouTube song where the Christian girls sing about getting fucked in the ass because of Jesus or did I fever dream that?

I don’t have t*k t*k but if I made one of those “hear me out cakes” videos I’d put Donald Duck on there

One thing about me is I DO be stubbing my toes on fucking everything

I don’t mean to start “straight women in gay bars” discourse but a straight woman did in fact just literally bunny hop in front of me to steal the only open table at the bar

Me vs the guy I just swiped left on

Saturday night roll call! I drank 1.25 margaritas and cried at The Sex Lives of College Girls, how about you?

One of my students decided to play “old throwbacks” at one of our events and promptly turns on OMG by Usher. I’m going to be sick.

The word sriracha has far too many r’s in it

Drink more water, they said! It’ll be fun, they said! You definitely WONT have to pee 347 times a day, they said!

I stayed in tonight and was going to drink a whiskey but I drank a ginger beer instead, so basically I’m doing dry January* *I’ve had a drink 2/3 days in January

What books did you love last year?

My instagram #topnine vs my real #topnine

I got a water pick for Christmas so naturally my bathroom mirror is covered in water droplets

My younger brother saw the Wicked movie and has never seen the show or listened to the soundtrack. It’s so adorable because he keeps sending me things he’s just learning like, “omg did you know there are notes in Defying Gravity that mirror the notes in Somewhere Over the Rainbow!?”

Coming out as someone who hates the movie A Christmas Story.

If any radio execs follow me, I know how you can keep listeners: Stop having “commercial free hour” punctuated by a commercial before every song about how it’s “commercial free hour.” Also radio? In 2024? Could only mean a visit home.

Happy #Survivor finale day to all who celebrate!

❤️❤️❤️

One of these gifts is for my work gift exchange. One of these gifts is for a sex toy gift exchange. I really hope I don’t grab the wrong gift tomorrow.

It's that time of year again! It's time for my HOLIDAY MOVIE THREAD! For those that don’t follow me over on the bad site and have no idea what I’m talking about, this is when I watch/rate a holiday movie every day until Christmas. It's fun! Join me!

The hate on Ariana as Glinda is so forced 🙄

Of the most beautiful parts of being a gay man is perusing your phone contacts

If your partner didn’t send you some sort of “gobble” or “stuffing” related dirty text today, it’s time to get a new partner 🦃😈

Some parts of the bad website deserve to live on

What do you use this ridiculous mini cabinet above the fridge for? Wrong answers only.

Whoever said “Saturdays are for the boys” didn’t know that Saturdays are for napping actually

Has enough time passed that we can say “Bluesky” is a bad name for a social media platform? Don’t get me wrong I love it here but how long until we come up with a quirky lil nickname for our girl?

There’s something about a daily commute that removes any semblance of existing as a sexual being

Maybe gays of Bluesky was the friends we made along the way

#Survivor editors LOVE when the two targets have names with the same first letter

Low of 73° in Florida tonight so I’m eating goulash, drinking whiskey, and watching Great British Bake Off under a blanket

“Starter pack this,” “starter pack that,” how about we starter pack the Supreme Court