All those Bush era neo-cons must be so livid right now, thinking "Wait, we could have just *said* it's for oil?"

If Schumer was being as useless as humanly possible on purpose, I don't know how it would look any different

Do you realize how insane and immediately disqualifying it should be for every democratic lawmaker to get out flanked to the left on anti-imperialism by *David Fucking Frum*?

Can't believe Clinton lost by running with this guy

Of course the party run exclusively by guys whose parents never said "I love you" are conflating "respect" with "fear."

I don't have to "be in awe of US military might." We've flushed universal healthcare, housing, and higher education, plus decades worth of public infrastructure projects down the toilet to funnel trillions of unaccounted dollars into our war machine. Of course they could afford a few helicopters

If the build up to the Iraq War has taught us anything, it's that within a month, American media will have the general public believing Maduro ran MS-13 and the Medellin Cartel.

"they will soon face the full wrath of American justice" suggests a lot of optimism that any American jury is going to know what the hell you're even talking about.

If any foreign country wants to do to Trump what he just did to Maduro, I won't object.

Really fucking maddening the way Republican voters have spent the last decade trying to frame themselves as being the new anti-war party just because their dumb president gave vague lip service to isolationist ideas. Watch them pivot right back to their Toby Keith brand of imperialistic jingoism now

Been working on it all week and it's getting close to done, in fact.

Stephen Strasburg owes Anthony Rendon a thank you letter for being such a publicly massive crank that everyone considers Rendon the worst free agent signing ever, when he wasn't even the worst Washington Nationals 2019 free agent.

Approximately 5 million people live within the Boston metro area, of which approx 6% are of daycare age. This would make for about 300,000 kids, approximately 25% of which (nat'l average) are in daycare. 75,000 children across 4,000 daycares is ~19 kids per. Sounds about right.

Where did this "the road to the super bowl goes through...[the number one seed]" shit even come from, man? 1 gets a bye. Goes to the division round. 7 beats 2, plays 1. 7 upsets. 3 and 4 win their round. 4 wins. 4 beats 7, goes to Super Bowl. Never took the road through the 1 seed. Shut up, dorks

If this ever happens to a flight with me on board, I'm going Todd Beamer on that cockpit door

New Key and Peele college bowl name just dropped

Surprised to hear the 28 year old's 60 year old husband isn't shooting blanks.

You're allowed to say "they violated the first amendment." Words have meaning. Their words and the constitution are both very explicit. You don't have to do the whole "some experts say" shit. Just say it's what they did. Fake objectivity serves no one except entrenched power.

"I don't think people that were born and raised in the cities can represent us to the same extent," says some dude who almost certainly voted for the president from New York City.

We already have this, it's a TV show called "Wipeout."

Someone stealing your groceries is clearly not operating as an agent of the law in any capacity, and should be treated the same way that right wingers routinely tell us they're "allowed" to treat would-be thieves in public with "second amendment solutions"

I have never felt so seen by a cookie

I do not specifically wish harm and poverty and suffering upon right wing grifters, I simply wish that they get to live in the world they try to create for others.

*Nothin' at all*

You know what? Fine. I'm giving props to NYT for choosing the banner photo of a Charlie Kirk sign in front of the wife killer's house.

They're calling it "the least serious publication in America"

Naming your little media company after the first amendment, finally getting a real job, and then turning around and immediately allowing the White House veto power over your stories is a perfect microcosm of every single right wing grift.

Starting to think the whole "let the president and his friends decide if the president did anything wrong" idea wasn't so great.

If Trump is the #1 guy on the planet with the most supporters in denial about him being a pedophile, MJ's gotta be #2. Hoping this helps bury him a little further.

Trump adding his own name but not removing the "Memorial" part. Let's goooooooo

After all of the talk about the 2024 in-roads Republicans supposedly made with Gen Z, this right wing think tank put together a 20 person focus group of them, and could only find 2 who weren't white, and 1 of those 2 walked out. Good luck with those demographics in the most diverse generation yet.

Making sure to include the giant crucifix necklace in your sketch of the guy who keeps claiming Jewish heritage while he talks about "understanding Hitler" is a real nice touch by the artist here.

There's literally one group of Americans who have sued all the way to the Supreme Court to protect their right to never ever ever have to be brave or heroic under any circumstances and have been given unimpeachable protection for defending themselves, and 80% of our country thinks they're heroes.

It's even funnier because on top of obviously talking about himself, this statement *itself* is a part of a pivot for his grift to differentiate himself enough that he can still be a mainstream grifter instead of a fringe one.

"Tend the rabbits"

Literally the only workplace race-based discrimination a white man ever actually faces in America is if he gets a job at a restaurant and continually fucks up the tickets, and every once in a while one of the Latino short order cooks yells out "El guero strikes again!" and they all laugh for a bit

"Show me a regulation"

What are Trump supporters even going to move on to when this doesn't change their miserable lives even one iota?

Crazy how so much of our country's oil somehow disappeared under another country's soil.

How the fuck you gonna be the former mayor of San Francisco and dickride Ronald fucking Reagan

This statement is serving to disgrace the long, dignified history of the FIFA Peace Prize

If Luigi Mangione had waited like 6 more weeks to shoot the UHC guy, he'd probably be sipping Mai Tais in Bali

I was gonna say that the whole "on the record/off the record/on background" stuff is something you learn like, first day in media studies classes, but no, that's not true. Anyone who has seen more than one movie with a journalist in it has also learned it.

Fascinating how much of the conservative reaction to Reiner's murder is tied up in confusion about a parent still loving their kid despite their troubles and differences.

"What if I continually shit on the fresh grave of the guy who directed Stand By Me?" is such a funny play for a guy whose only remaining support base is terminally lead poisoned Gen X latchkey kids.

Does anyone remember which celebrity it was who once said something to the effect of "If [tabloid] was reporting that I had died, I would check my own pulse"? Not saying it's a good thing, obviously, but most of the worst rags have an insane number of contacts all over Hollywood and the city.