New blog post: open.substack.com/pub/dreamwea...

I’m beginning to think “Let the voters decide” was a piss-poor replacement for a working criminal-justice system.

If I were in the public eye and people thought I voted for Trump, I would want to clear that shit up sooner rather than later.

SHORTER QANON: I have been hearing late-breaking reports that our government is staffed top to bottom with child-trafficking pedophiles, and hang on (touches earpiece) there is absolutely nothing wrong with this

The Right have their own “Cancel Culture” now. It’s called ICE.

I am deeply concerned that we are surrounded by millions of people who hear the things Trump says every day and act like it is perfectly normal and reasonable behavior from a U.S. President

Wait, are you telling me that a man who met his wife when he was 30 and she was 18 is in the Epstein Files

1. Better late than never 2. BUT NOT MUCH

SHORTER FOX NEWS: The liberal elites refuse to give the Trump family credit for their brilliant works of art, but that is only because they hate his masked stormtroopers kidnapping migrants and murdering people in the streets

CRIMES THAT ARE OKAY WITH REPUBLICANS: - Money laundering - Fraud - Racketeering - Embezzlement - Election interference - Obstruction of law enforcement - Sexual Assault - Child Trafficking - Rape CRIMES THAT ARE NOT OKAY WITH REPUBLICANS: - Illegal border crossings

TEN FOX NEWS COMPLAINTS ABOUT THE GRAMMY AWARDS 10. Why couldn’t we hear from more artists who supported masked ICE stormtroopers kidnapping and murdering people in the streets

Reasonable people may disagree about the limits of gun control. But not even the most extreme gun-control advocates believe that carrying a concealed weapon should result in immediate death at the hands of the police.

If nothing happens to Donald Trump as a result of the Epstein Files, then the GOP will consider the Epstein Files a nothingburger until the end of time. I’m not entirely sure what to do about this. But I thought it might help to say it out loud.

THE ACCELERATIONIST PLAN 1. Trump destroys America 2. ??????? 3. SOCIALIST UTOPIA!

2016-2024: Donald Trump is a pathological liar who was impeached twice, found liable for sexual assault, indicted for 88 felonies, convicted of 34 of them and attempted an insurrection in broad daylight 2024 VOTERS: The election is about one thing: the economy. Also, I am scared of immigrants

The average American had a choice: vote for the black woman or vote for the 34x CONVICTED felon, pedophile, admitted rapist who tried to overthrow the government, promised to be a dictator on Day 1 and promised to help Israel finish the genocide. But yeah, Democrats had bad messaging. 🙄

“That shocking accusation is an outrageous lie” + time = “What’s the big deal; everybody does it”

The problem here is that these stations are not news reporting per se. They are explicit right-wing propaganda whose purpose is to destroy Democrats and make excuses for Republicans. “What if Fox, OANN and Newsmax called Donald Trump a pedophile?” takes us to a world of fairies and elves.

The media is only part of the problem.

DEMS 2026: Trump fucks children and is murdering people on the streets of Minneapolis GOP 2026: Trump fucks children and is murdering people on the streets of Minneapolis AND THERE’S NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT 😂

Full thread: ⬇️

“Hey, Boomers! Remember how much you hate Jane Fonda and all those hippies? Well, ICE is here to blow them all away!”

REPUBLICAN RULES OF CONJUGATION: “Fascist” is only valid in the past tense. ✅ “Hitler WAS a fascist.” ❌ “Trump IS a fascist.” You are not allowed to describe any current leader as a fascist, because clearly that is liberal hysteria.

Okay, this is good.

expletive

New blog post: open.substack.com/pub/dreamwea...

Outstanding. youtu.be/GDaPdpwA4Iw?...

TEN UNEXPECTED REVELATIONS IN THE NEW FILM ABOUT MELANIA TRUMP 10. Her son Barron is only 5’10”, but he is always photographed next to Greg Bovino to make him appear taller 9. Started wearing those really wide hats during COVID to facilitate social distancing from husband

I guess “Jeff Bezos Gave the Trump Family Millions of Dollars for a Pointless Vanity Project So Trump Will Leave Amazon Alone” was too long to fit on the poster

It’s taken a few weeks to sink in that Nicki Minaj may very possibly have been serious about voting for Mitt Romney

New blog post: open.substack.com/pub/dreamwea...

I think I’ve officially reached my upper limit on “I’m going to hold your hand when I say this” posts. I don’t care who you are. You have not earned the right to be so incredibly condescending.

Megyn Kelly is on her hands and knees, furiously digging through the Earth with a rusty spoon, reaching previously-unforseen frontiers of Rock Bottom on her one-way trip to Hell.

You’re too kind!

My son has come to the belated realization that now is the worst possible time to be taking a Poli Sci course in college because our government has absolutely no fucking rules anymore

- There are not enough centrists in America to win presidential elections without help from the leftists. - And there are not enough leftists in America to win presidential elections without help from the centrists.

Hey, I’m fine with granting social amnesty to any Republican who says “I’ll never vote for Trump again.” But they’ve gotta mean it.

Well, I for one am excited to see MELANIA because I can’t wait to see what kind of big trouble she has planned for Moose and Squirrel

New blog post: open.substack.com/pub/dreamwea...

“I’m so sick of Democrats telling me to vote for them because the Republicans would be so much worse!” You know there’s a REASON we keep saying this, right?

Here’s the real problem: it doesn’t matter WHAT the Epstein Files prove Trump did if nobody is able to prosecute him for it.

This thread seems pertinent today: ⬇️

This is the exact mirror image of the Kyle Rittenhouse debate and yet in both cases the anti-MAGA side ended up dead

But hey, at least we don’t have to worry about prisoners having gender-transition surgery on the taxpayer’s dime, amirite

“A deranged dictator with dreams of world domination. An endless dehumanization campaign against immigrants and homosexuals. Masked stromtroopers in the streets. Concentration camps. Today, CBS Sunday Morning remembers the Holocaust and/or reports on current events in America.”

A MAGA troll on Substack told me “It is only through American benevolence that other countries are allowed to exist as they are” and honestly I think that would have been a much more effective Trump 2024 campaign slogan than that “No New Wars” thing he decided to go with

A reminder to the news media: “conflicting accounts” is what you say BEFORE the incontrovertible video evidence appears. After that, your job is to ask why one side is lying, not to repeat the lie and pretend no one knows the truth.