It is my understanding that women on trails who see men are afraid. I have a modest proposal: Start shoving middle-aged men who you see running. I can GUARANTEE that if I am more than 1k into my 5k, I AM GOING DOWN HARD, and not getting back up. FILM it. "WHOSE TRAILS? OUR TRAILS!"

Two life sentences for the humans sounds right. Just add in a death penalty cuz of the dog.

Got bullied this morning on my run. A cottonwood seed followed me for six blocks, catcalling @ me: "INHALE ME BIG BOY!"

An 80s Christian Saturday Morning Cartoon show with a giant robot named Metatron.

Really wish my High School had had a class called "You can stop responding to the person who is very wrong."

unbothered by clutter

Approximately 75% of my interactions with strangers is me telling them they can't get on my roof and look for storm damage.

Hating yourself for being overweight is so basic and boring. That's why I'm trying to lose some weight so I can discover some more unique and interesting ways to hate myself.

It is enraging, that the worst thing the Trump Administration has done, by several orders of magnitude are last year's cuts to USAid, but it gets zero coverage. Studies have estimated It killed half a million children y'all. Just the absolute stupidest dystopia.

My solution to the current SCOTUS crisis: rather than packing the court; Super-SCOTUS, which SCOTUS rulings can be appealed to. This Super-SCOTUS is automatically formed from a pool of public high school social studies teachers, and if a majority of them say "WTF IS THIS SH*T", overruled.

So to recap: * Social Media is addictive and bad for you * Sports Betting/Prediction Markets are addictive and bad for you * Most of our food is processed and is addictive and bad for you

I think letting SNAP recipients have hot rotisserie chicken is good, actually.

Film you’ve watched more than six times with a gif. Hard mode: no Star Trek, Star Wars, LOTR, DC, Marvel, Disney, Pixar, Spielberg, Cameron, Wachowskis, or Ghibli.

I don't know if the rest of the country still cares, but this was the week where it seemed like normalcy start to creep back into parts of MN. Kids returned to school in many places. People started feeling safe enough to grocery shop for themselves.

So there are two guards, and two doors, and one guard who always lies and one guard who always tells the truth, and it is your job to figure out what happened in that guard's life to make him like that?

BLOOB FOR THE BLOOB GOD!

The best and most persuasive argument against the admin using a nuke, is that they are fundamentally lazy, and dropping a nuke would create a F-ton of work for them going forward.

There is a Senate race in Georgia today. The odds of a D win are low. But volunteering to make GOTV calls there is probably the most impactful thing you can do as a citizen.

I made the mistake of flipping my feed from Minneapolis/St Paul to generic Follow, and man, I do not recommend that. I far prefer microcosm bsky.

Well I sleep well knowing he's doing everything he can. And by everything-he-can I mean: "Every form of lazy, bewildering bluster."

My dog has the preternatural ability to detect prostate.

If scientists are so smart, why haven't they invented a way to find out without fucking around first?

Too real AWS. Too Real.

Amy Klobuchar is speaking at the FIRST robotics competition being held at Mariuchi arena. Seems the perfect venue to disclose if she supports federal legislation to provide Ilhan Omar with a gundam.

My Daughter: "Are you watching Sad Hospital?" Me: "It is more like Sad Action Hospital" The Pitt Character: "I am so sad I don't know how to cry." Me: "Okay, it is Sad Hospital."

My Daughter: "Ugh, I have so much homework tonight." My Wife: "Life is pain, so says the Buddha." Me: "And also the Dread Pirate Roberts."

Hey bsky, I managed to coordinate a viable walking subcaucus around Uncommitted for Governor that ended up getting 2x delegates, all of whom were first time convention goers.

Happy Steam Spring Sale to those who celebrate.

I deadass think that Democratic leadership should be out there THANKING the president for the steep carbon tax he has introduced. Literally spend all day calling him an eco-warrior for decarbonizing our planet. Not with a goofy smirk, play it straight. It would get coverage, and drive MAGA crazy.

Guys, The Rise & Fall of Reggie DInkins is very funny. Never has a show had me miss a punchline so many times because I was googling if their reference from the previous joke was real (and yeah, it always is.)

My wife is wearing a hot new dress today that makes here happy, so today's not all bad. Just mostly bad.

Probably not on your radar is the humanitarian crisis the US has setup in Cuba. Between actions Venezuela and pressure we've put on Mexico, nobody is willing to provide oil/gas to Cuba anymore. Planes cannot even land there anymore as no airports have jet fuel.

Guys I know there is a lot going on, but I think that makes it all the more important to carve out time in your busy life to tell your internet router how much you appreciate it and how sad you would be if it was gone.

Post your favorite Lord of the Rings character. Wrong answers only.

My Sunday:

Hold up... if AIs have a sense of self-preservation... Does that mean... We can charge them RENT? Like, maybe we're missing some vital context in Terminator 2.

The real war is between the Low Empathy Bastards and Everybody Else.

What if we held hands while watching The Tragedy of the Commons?

The teacher in my life was shopping for women's history posters on Amazon, see if you can spot the problem with this one...

"Me? Oh yeah I'm fine, just doing something I like to call Fetal-Positionmaxxing. How are you?"

Just thinking about October 2016, James Comey licking his pen, feeling morally compelled to share vital information about one of the two presidential candidates. And then wondering how long you have to scream before you get one of those nice padded rooms.

I think they should announce a John Wick prequel. Keep it super hush, hush. Vague trailers, showing no scenes. And then on day of, just release Grosse Point Blank, unaltered.

Is Wes Anderson on bsky? 📸: Leila Navidi

What movie moment made you cry out, "This is CINEMA!"

So the El Paso closure was probably something like: Dept of War: "Let's test some of the anti-drone EM weapons along the border!" FAA: "Umm, have you tested to see how those affect commercial aircraft at various altitudes" DoW: "No!" FAA: "Well then you can't" DoW: "You can't tell me what to do!"

I love how Venezuela is now like a discarded and forgotten toy in Trump's playbin. One he wanted so very badly when he didn't have it, and now can't be bothered with.