There’s a contingent of people on here who feel it’s their duty to act as the “Fun Police” for everyone. To that contingent of people, may I offer this bit of advice? Remove the collective sticks from your collective assholes, you uptight spackleheads. Thank you. Carry on.

I’m excelling at those second two sentences.

Customer orders two heavy ass brake rotors, immediately sends them right back with the excuse, “I don’t have the fuckin time to put them on.” You had the fuckin time to order them, dumbass.

It’s been a long week. Me, at 10:45am Tuesday when I had Monday off.

Also today feels like a Monday and that can fuck ALL the way off.

It feels like it should be a lot later than 9:11am.

Why does this keep getting likes??? Is me doing laundry THAT interesting? 😂

It’s Tuesday. Enjoy this Mandarin Duck.

I called my alarm several names this morning that would have made Mama Duck wash my mouth out with soap.

Long weekend’s over. Back to work. Sup, y’all!

This website is not for discourse, it’s for me to talk about ducks and comics and being horny on main.

Fuck yeah.

I hadn’t seen the movie “Top Secret!” since I was a kid. I forgot how ridiculous, absurd, and funny this movie is. Also, Hilary is a German name that means “one whose bosoms defy gravity.”

Pick a Bond villain from the photos you have in your phone

When she asks you to recommend a comic book to her… 🫠🫠🫠😍😍😍

Show us how you’ve changed. Me at 17 and me at 51.

A gas gas gas? In this economy?

Why are you like this? *I drank from the water hose *I had unrestricted access to Cinemax as a kid *subversive literature *disdain for authority *comic books *I like breakfast food and pretty, dark haired women

Hey, Wilson Phillips…I’ve been holding on for one more day for 36 years. Can I just let go already?

I know a couple of ladies named Ginger and I don’t think they’d be into this.

My laundry is washed, dried, folded, hung, and put away because I am a responsible adult. Now, I’m gonna read some comic books.

Did someone mention #MonochromeMonday?

The mercurochrome of it all. I think I still have red stains from mom putting that stuff on wounds I suffered 40 years ago.

Cope and Cage vs FTR was everything I want in a train wreck of a wrestling match. That shit was amazing. #AEWDON

But I really wanna…

Reskeet with a favorite picture of yourself

When did Mick Foley turn into Captain Lou Albano?

Y’all. I don’t deserve this amazing lady.

That time I put a 2 Live Crew cassette in my cousin’s Teddy Ruxpin.

So…what do you guys wanna talk about? ngl.link/justducky2

Gentlemen, do better. There’s a line. Don’t cross it.

I’m a lucky Ducky.

I’ve been reading comics most of the day and my eyes are kinda swimming.

Some days I have to strive to be half of that. 😂

Sorry, I thought you asked for DUCK pics. Oops.

I totally just misheard that PNC commercial and thought they said, “A little whoring advice goes a long way.”

We’re exactly 6 months from my birthday. What y’all getting me?

In honor of Bob Dylan’s 85th birthday, here’s my favorite song by him. open.spotify.com/track/6q9rNS...

Happy birthday to Bob Dylan, an icon

Exactly. I’m trying to escape from all that on here.

I know nothing about IndyCar racing, but I’m rooting for Pato O’Ward today because “Pato” is the Spanish word for “duck”.

Happy Sunday y’all!

Sunday morning biscuit run! It’s Bo Time!

Stayed up way past my bedtime tonight. Worth it.

Also, I managed to fascinate a woman and I didn’t even need a piece of cheese. Imagine what I could do with some Gouda.

I might watch the Indy 500 tomorrow.

I’ve heard that recently. Very recently. Like 10 minutes ago, actually. To which I respond, I’m just…me.

Have fun with it. ngl.link/justducky2

Ruin a band by replacing a word with a bodily fluid... Pearl Jizz