Nintendo suing your newborn for being born on MAR10

Heinzeken: All natural ketchup flavored beer! 😋🍺

Me calling my “porn addiction” my insane freakyness

Acting silly all day just to drop one movie-character ass line, then returning to being silly

Gave homie the optical media treatment

Driver’s seat blowjobs really give a whole new meaning to “your getting off at this exit.”

laugh so hard it felt like an orgasm

Craving some jerky, need some meat in my mouth rn gbyhgmglgmmm..

So mad. I bought a Makima vrc model, and I can’t even use it bc I’m still visitor rank. 😔

Why does wind always have to blow TOWARDS me, and fuckup my hair. Why can’t it blow from behind me? Ugh

🐦‍⬛ Look at him he’s so cool

There would be a traumatic accident where both my testicles get absolutely macerated, my parents are all serious and devasted and I’m like: Ohhhh nooo, not thooose I care about them sOoo much.. /s

Gay male doms dress up in such cool outfits omg, honestly would love to dress like that.

Jerky after jerkin it

If he ever asks you: “What is your max recorded squirt velocity?” Hit him with the: “What is your max load size in ml?”

Breathing is so annoying, I wish I had something to breathe for me.

Be applying the estrogen spray like a fragrance fr fr

Lowkey wanna cover someone in garlic butter, and lick their skin off 😋

Part of me hopes discord continues, because I’ve been having a lot of fun setting up a Teamspeak server, and trying out Matrix instead. I hope those services take this chance and improve, so discord will have bigger competition.

MAINE LMFAOOO

BluesKKKy is like the only app where I don’t use the save button for porn. (Kinda 50/50)

This dude is a fucking joke LMFAOO I remember whenever he started one of his videos like “aNd I haAte the obaAmas!” (I saw a clip, I don’t watch Nick Cucktes)

There should be government/private companies that send out people with rigged phones, with small explosives, so that when pickpockets take them, they detonate them.

Did anyone also used to copy and paste so much text, to try and crash the google doc when you didn’t have WiFi?

balls pussy

If ur seeing this u should check if you’ve got a discord nitro subscription activated, and whether or not you want to continue paying that.

Discord is about to watch their profit crash and burn.

How do all six photos I take of myself look like completely different people?

I love listening to “California Girls” while committing the greatest food atrocities, like using ketchup for bolognese.

If you see this, post a character that starts with L.

I swear, any more drops in his approval rating and trump bouta turn into an iPad

Lock in twin, more like lock up twin haha..

American beer taste test! 🤩👍

Former Olympic Gold Medalist and Sex Icon Waluigi condemns ICE publicly.

So horny I turned gay

Thought my new switchblade arrived earlier, was so excited until I arrived, and realized “COMPLETE” meant they were done with packing, and they just shipped it out. 🥲

If I had 200 cocks would they all need to cum? Or could I just cum from one and be done? Could I have multiple orgasms across all my cocks? These are the questions that need answered.

Two transgirls snuggling together like two Atlantic salmon out of water, just sloshing together, like slimey eels.

Cum flavoring pills/injections would go so hard, I want it to taste like cherries or sugary frosting. Or a full 3-course meal in my nutsack.

Avatar: Fire and Ass, was the most mid 3 hours of my life, I would play it in the background but, ʷᵒᵃʰ it was kiind of above-average

“Cow in the field” ig idk

FEED ME

Where can I get bitten? Waiter, girls that will bite me please!

This drive “SATA AF” my g

Goals.

Are you fucking serious?

I wanna build Lego sets with a girl so badly.. millennium falcon?

Just realized I can use the “It’s big for a woman.” Excuse now

Nngh!! Mff!! MGGG!! Hnnn.. MMM! “Is she masturbating?” “Nah, probably just remembering all those embarrassing moments in her life” WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN?? 😭