'tis the season to be hor- jolly.

Gockscare.

A cat on your bed.

Boo(bies). Check my pinned post on X for information on how I'm doing.

~ come closer to my feet and give them a taste ~ 📸: @totallynotseiso.bsky.social

Feelings of missing out are at an all time high so I'm taking this time to recharge my social battery. Y'all stay safe out there.

Trackers have now been sold, thanks everyone

Deity.

"Sorry, Daddy, I've been naughty." "For the last time, it's 'Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.'"

Today is the Lord's Day—have you prayed?

Downtime.

What do you mean, "Is that a grenade in your hand, or are you just happy to see me?" It's a grenade. Obviously.

One more thing: a quiet life, or a blaze of glory?

Tranquillitas per aequilibrium.

Subservience.

Obey.

Chicken ______? ❌jockey ✅banana

I think you and I both know this is your fault.

It's your turn to sing. Don't tell me you're getting cold feet now.

Do care, did ask, plus I love you.

>be me >meet someone through twitter >add them as a friend >ask to hang out >get ghosted >get unfriended

Anybody in the Philippines wanna buy two unused, still sealed 3.0 trackers? Shoot me a message. Kinda need em gone for some medical expenses.

Подходи ко мне, и только закрывай дверь. 𝐶𝑜𝑚𝑒 𝑡𝑜 𝑚𝑒, 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑗𝑢𝑠𝑡 𝑐𝑙𝑜𝑠𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑑𝑜𝑜𝑟. Я хочу побыть с тобою наедине. 𝐼 𝑤𝑎𝑛𝑡 𝑡𝑜 𝑏𝑒 𝑎𝑙𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑦𝑜𝑢.

Hump Day? Hump Day.

What? It's laundry day.

I agree... the moon does look pretty from here.

You: "Is she into me?" Your friend: "Follow your heart." Your heart:

I want you, I need you, but there ain't no way I'm ever gonna love you. Now don’t be sad, ’cause two out of three ain’t bad.

The socks ARE staying on.

You may or may not be immune to boobie propaganda. Find out today!

You said you would help me carry these.

Just a moment, I'll be out soon.

I can't promise I won't be too hard on ya, but I'll try.

Official train inspector here— mind if I inspect your package?

Netflix and chill? ︀︀Nah — I prefer to procrastinate and ejaculate.

You said you wanted help passing your oral exam?

I could use your moral support. The 'm' is silent. (Oh, we hit 100 followers!)

When will Bluesky get post scheduling?

Now, why would I choose between a fun time and a good time — when with you, I can have both?

Overstressed and underfucked. (This was posted 6 hours and 55 minutes ahead of other platforms.)

Well?

We should kiss like this (wowie is that a Bluesky exclusive pic nowaynoway) ((i totally didn't forget to post a pic here when i posted it on twitter)) (((it's called x now seiso get on with the plan)))

Not really intent on posting this on the platform where I experience most of it, but hey, if you follow me here, you know what I'm thinking about.

To address all allegations that I am a bottom: As you can see, I’m on top. No further questions.

Friday again, Garfie baby.

The Venn diagram of the things I hate and the things I have is very steadily becoming one circle with each passing social interaction.

𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐚𝐡 (𝑛𝑜𝑢𝑛) ᴘᴀ·​ʀɪ·​ᴀʜ 𝑆𝑜𝑚𝑒𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑜𝑟 𝑠𝑜𝑚𝑒𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑖𝑠 𝑑𝑒𝑠𝑝𝑖𝑠𝑒𝑑 𝑜𝑟 𝑟𝑒𝑗𝑒𝑐𝑡𝑒𝑑.