Anthony Gordon #fpl Impostor Theory ☆ He now plays out of position ☆ He doesn't smile since the headband appeared ☆ I've seen this shit before

Rob Edwards #fpl

Sums up #fpl this season. The most sold defender (by %) in the past hour is Lucky.

Whitney captaincy turned out better than Thiago or Ekitike. Kelleher did well on so little sleep. Frimpong, you star 🌟 #fpl

🤩 # FPL Mindfulness 🤩 I've gone early, sold Ndiaye before he's even played. When I did that to Palmer, it fired him up, so he scored a hattrick. Hopefully, my man management tactics work again. TV: £107.9M Zero 🏦 5-2-3 formation. Ndiaye to Mbeumo #fpl

Erling Haaland was unable to play last weekend due to an overdose of gamma radiation, altering his body chemistry. He should be fine for midweek #fpl

🤩 #FPL Mindfulness 🤩 My -8. Ndiaye 🧢 £2.5M 🏦

Liverpool have You'll Never Walk Alone. Arsenal have North London Forever. Suggestion for Spurs alternative? 🤔 #fpl youtu.be/d1gYJDQXPOk?...

Erling Haaland in emotional plea to his #FPL owners; "Don't give up on us, baby Don't make the wrong seem right The fixture isn't just one night It's written in the floodlights Painted on the stars We can't change ours"

Most #fpl benches right now

Just had Erling Haaland call me, and sing the theme from Minder, then hang up. I know team leaks are frowned upon in the #fpl community, but I'm not selling him.

My #fpl mini league with my sons is great fun. Small Hippie: Haaland 🧢 Rogers VC 43 points 1480 Total Me: Thiago 🧢 75 points -16 1470 Total Smallest Hippie: Wilson 🧢 78 points 1430 Total

#FPL is a maths game based on professional footballers' performances. Imagine fantasy games for other professions. Fantasy Bus Drivers. Fantasy Heart Surgeons. Fantasy Sex Workers. Fantasy Supermarket Cashiers. Fantasy Hod Carriers. Fantasy Strawberry Pickers. There are so many possibilities.

#FPL this season

#FPL right now

I live in Isleworth. For those who are unfamiliar with the area, this video was filmed locally in Syon Park just recently. We all dress like this around here. youtu.be/uw2eitx9Ly0?...

"Benching me, then making me Captain against West Ham when many will have sold me is a smart move." #fpl

How was my weekend? Just when it was expected to point downwards, mine pointed upwards. 😉 #fpl

Groovy 🤩 #fpl

Like many #fpl squads, Chelsea will struggle to field 11 in BGW31 🤔

I should've married Whitney Houston. We'd both have been better off. However, as a poor alternative, I'm captaining Ndiaye against Burney midweek. I'll likely lineup like this off my -8. Penalty takers everywhere. VAR, sort my season! 🤣 £2.5M 🏦 #fpl

Green arrow off a -16. Likely to change when VC's kick in for Haaland captainers. But I'm proud of how well my dudes have stepped up 🤩 #fpl

OK, so far 🤩 #fpl

My older son captained Haaland. VC Rogers. He's a Brentford fan. I captained Thiago. 🤔 #fpl

Welcome to my #fpl squad, Anthony Gordon. Penalty-taker, with combustible fixture in GW31 at home versus Sunderland. £0.3m below his starting price. Rogers had his chances with me. Penalty-takers everywhere in Hippie's Galacticos 🤩

Tonight's match is sponsored by Emery bored. #fpl

Gone early 😃 -4 Mukiele to VVD Wirtz to Wilson £2.1M 🏦 Double LIV defence with Frimpong. Differential Ndiaye in midfield. Exciting!!!

🤩 #FPL Mindfulness 🤩 Good luck, folks 🤩

#FPL is updating..... Groovy! 🤩 youtu.be/t28A6cnPxUM?...

Unai Emery seems to sign strikers to play ahead of Ollie Watkins, e.g. Rashford. It's like if Emery and Watkins were married, he'd move his sidechick into the family home and snog them openly. "Good ebening, family. This is Tammy. They're going to live here and sleep in my room." #fpl

Introducing Samantha's youngest 🥰

This #fpl YouTuber is 23 in the World 🤯 youtu.be/FexfXS6nbW0?...

#uclfantasy Green arrow off a -8, groovy 🤩 Up to 127k.

Samantha is so obedient 🥰

I'm outside having a smoke 😵‍💫 Samantha appears and sits by the back door, waiting where I can't miss her. I think that's a hint that it's feeding time 🤔

My GW28 -16. Players return to compete in my #fpl Team Of The Year. O'Reilly 14pts in 4 Semenyo 86pts in 14, 1 🧢 Frimpong 20pts in 4, 1 🧢 Thiago 54pts in 10 Kelleher debuts, to chase Petrovic 27pts in 7 And Sanchez 43pts in 11.

Dalot, on 9 DefCon. Hopefully, 1 more will be added. Oh no, silly me, it's a Monday night game. Stupid #fpl system.

🤩 #FPL Mindfulness 🤩 Not so bad. Nice cameos from Dalot and Mbeumo (already sold.) Groovy 🤩

Even Samantha's youngest, shyest cub risks coming near me for home-cooked chips. Can't see if it's a he or a she.

Sir Jim wakes up alone with a sore arsehole and a shitty finger. "An immigrant must've sneaked in and done this," he concludes. #fpl

☆ Season Highlight ☆ When Let's Talk #FPL Andy sold Bruno "Now, Bruno, he's been my pal for as long as I can remember. He's brave, like a player should be. So many routes to points. But the thing that makes Bruno special is he'll never give up on you. Ever. He'll be there for you, no matter what."

To think, yesterday could've been the last Premier League North London Derby for many, many years. 😉 #fpl

Ndiaye gets an early debut tonight, subbed on for Wirtz. Dicey, but #fpl seems OK so far 🤩

Thomas Frank, in a luxury villa somewhere warm, enjoying the football. #fpl

☆ ☆ #FPL Bearking News ☆ ☆ Mikel Arteta tells Arsenal players to do something else.

My last #fpl gameweek this season not owning Semenyo. Sold him last week. Been shaking like a shitting dog ever since. He's back in for GW28 already.

🤩 #FPL Mindfulness 🤩 Gone early. -12 sets me up to Roll until GW32. £1.7M 🏦 Semenyo, Thiago, Frimpong return. Welcome, Mumble Kelleher, I'll learn to pronounce your first name soon. Mbeumo had to go due to the Brentford players coming in, for squad harmony.

"Cole Palmer. Talented you are. Nice bloke you are. Teach you I will. But quite frankly I think you're just too fucking dim to understand all this Jedi stuff. Offence meant none." #FPL

Cole Palmer, game show host #fpl

Good luck, folks! 🤩